The Bucket List

some things are just private

"Yeah. Yeah. Sure."

"Thanks." I mutter under my breath. I feel like I want to cry, and sulk in my bedroom, and that's probably what I'll go do.

"Morgan?"

"What?"

"Why didn't you tell me?" His voice is soft, sentimental even, if you can believe it.

"I don't know, I figured it wasn't important."

"Your death?" I flinch when he says it like that. "You dying is pretty fucking important. I don't know that might just be my opinion."

"Yeah, but not to you." I mutter.

"It kind of seems like that, doesn't it?"

"What do you think?"

"I mean, obviously, it would seem like that. But, I've known you for like ten fucking years. Even if I do hate you, I've known you forever, and it would still hurt. Even a little."

"I thought you couldn't feel pain."

"Not really."

I roll my eyes as we pull up into the driveway. I get out of his car as quickly as I can and speed walk into the house, flip off my shoes and walk up the stairs. The first tear falls from my eye and I wipe it away, and start to run up the stairs. I hate when people see me cry.
"Hey. Morgan." Liam calls after me.

"Fuck off." I say to Liam sternly, angry that he told Kevin about my situation.

"Morgan." He says back, again, we're both in the hallway now, staring at each other.

"Liam, I said, fuck off."

"No, listen."

"FUCK OFF LIAM! HOW HARD IS THAT? I DON'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU RIGHT NOW!"

"Morgan, please just listen-"

"No." I say, in a low and quiet voice, and walk into my room, and quietly shut the door. For some reason, I'm not crying.

That's right. I would never cry over something that had to do with Kevin.

I hear muttering from downstairs, and so I slowly and quietly open the door and I hear Liam's voice clearly.

"I don't know why she's so mad." Liam says, and I roll my eyes.

"I don't think she wanted you to tell me."

"Why not?"

"I don't know, I mean, she's always hated me and maybe it has something to do with that." Finally, he finally understands something.

"Yeah, maybe you're right. I should go apologize, right?"

"Probably." I don't want to talk to Liam right now.

So I do what I always do. Climb onto the roof.

I go up the staircase just outside my bedroom into the sunroom, and from there, I open the window, put a chair underneath so I can reach, and pull myself up. I close the window after and lock it from the outside, so that Liam can't get up here. I sit on the roof, hoping that maybe there would be a gust of wind hard enough to send my flying off the roof.

There's a faint knock on the window.

I look over and see Liam's face looking up at me. I roll my eyes, and look away.

"Come on, Morgan, please let me in." I hear faintly through the glass.

I give in and unlock the window. Liam pulls himself through a second later, and closes it back up again.

"Where's Kevin?" I say coldly.

"Downstairs. Look, I'm really sorry. I didn't realize you didn't want him to know."

"Well, I didn't want anyone to know, really. I thought you knew that."

"But then you told Addison and Rachel."

"No I didn't. They don't know."

"Oh. I thought they did. I didn't think it would be a problem, if I only told one person, and Kevin really wanted to know."

"But it's not just one person."

"What do you mean?"

"All Kevin cares about is being popular, now that he knows something that nobody else knows, he knows that he can tell everyone and gain so much popularity from it."

"Kevin isn't like that, at least not anymore. He understands that you didn't want people to know, and he'll respect that. I'll make sure of it."

"Thanks."

"No problem. Now, if you want anything I'm going to Starbucks."

"Surprise me."

"Okay. See you later.

I'd never had Starbucks before, I don't think Liam has either.

But it's on my bucket list.

Kevin is trying to help me.

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