Part XXVIII

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"Oh..okay".

Namjoon enters Taehyung's room and closes the door behind him. He follows Taehyung and sit on Jimin's bed next to Taehyung's. Both of them can't help but feeling awkward now that they're actually sitting, facing each other. Namjoon leans forward a little and rest his elbows on his thighs. He clamps his palms together with his lips quivering; he tries to deliver whatever's roaming on his mind at the moment clearly and simple.

"Why did you lie to me?", Taehyung starts off quick with the heated up topic. His gaze never left the marble floor that feels cold under their feet. Coincidentally, Taehyung is also in the same posture as Namjoon. Knowing Namjoon for quite some time now; he was pretty sure Namjoon is going to defend his act and continue with his team-centered opinions.

"I'm sorry".

Both of them said, at the same time. Both Namjoon and Taehyung look at each other's faces. It's like facing a goddamn mirror; they are in completely shock, utterless state.

"I'm sorry for lying", Namjoon immediately continue, "I'm very sorry..I- I don't know what's got into me-"

"I'm sorry too. For being ignorant all this time", Taehyung rakes his hair to the back, "I don't realize- it's been hard on you".

Namjoon even more surprised after listening to what Taehyung just said.

"No- Taehyung-ah, please forgive me, it's my fault, and I'm really ashamed for doing that. I regretted and I deserve your hatred- I deserve your outburst-".

"You did it for me; for us. I'm so selfish that I didn't see how grateful I am to have you as a part of the team; as a leader. And a family". Taehyung's eyes shone with glitters of regret and grateful at the same time. He meant every single word that he said. And Namjoon felt it. "But I still can't get over it; how- why you lied to me, hyung? You know how school is important to me. I told all of you how my late mother have always wanted me to finish school-".

Namjoon retreats his head and looks away from Taehyung. He shuts his eyes firmly.

"I envy you".

Taehyung freezes at his position. The words flew from Namjoon's mouth are practically played around his head before Taehyung can eventually digest it.

"Envy? Me? Hyung-"

"Yes. I envy you. Look around, Taehyung. Look at yourself". Namjoon's voice filled with sorrow but he tried to pull a out a bitter curve at the edge of his lips. "You have everything. You are handsome, you can sing very well, and most of all you have the gift to make everyone around you happy; and everyone is pleased to be themselves around you and they accept you the way you are. And then the fans, they always favored you the most. And you have that special someone to love you-".

"Hyung!", to Namjoon's surprise, Taehyung pulled him into a brotherly hug.

"Meanwhile, you guys had me as the leader. Haha..", Namjoon scoffs. "I don't have anything but my music to brag about. I never thought I could lead you guys and I never will. I thought b- being cold, heartless and stubborn will actually let me to bring the whole  team forward. Instead, I'm breaking all of us. I let everybody down".

"I've let you down..I'm sorry", Namjoon said as he weakly lands his head onto Taehyung's shoulder.

"No, please stop. Hyung," Taehyung calls for him and Namjoon looks back at him. "You are not as worse or as low as you think you are! God, hyung, I'm jealous of you instead! You have the ability to produce such heavenly and meaningful music, a- and those who didn't see you for yourself are in fact missing out; a lot! Because of you, we're here now. You might not really look at yourself, but to me, you're awesome and you don't need faces like mine to be awesome; you're awesome as well. I always adore you; you lead us with such charisma, you took everything for us first before we eventually had an effect on it and you dealt with it yourself as much as you can!".

Namjoon suddenly laughs at Taehyung, there are faded colours of light red emerges on his cheekbones. "You're talking like you are some kind of a sasaeng fan of mine".

"Indeed I am, hyung. With that sexy brain of yours-" Taehyung smirked but then Namjoon stops him from going further.

"Now now, are you sure you're not only wanted to kiss or suck my ass or something?". Namjoon uplifts his eye brow at Taehyung.

"Eyy how did you know?".

"Ijasshika (this brat-)!", Namjoon swings his leg slowly and hits Taehyung's balls playfully. Causing Taehyung to groan.

"Oh my f.ucking God! Hyung! What the f.uck?!", Taehyung takes a hold of his unaffected balls and throws himself onto his bed.

"Stop playing around, you idiot. You want to go full power?", Namjoon teases Taehyung as he lifts his leg and sways it.

Both of them laugh hysterically before they eventually become quiet again. Namjoon clears his throat lightly before he speaks.

"So, I heard you're seeing someone now?".

Taehyung shyly nods. He is actually not yet ready to come clean about this to the members, especially Namjoon.

"Fine, fine", Namjoon sighs. "I believe in you".

His sentences blows a spark of hope and contentment inside Taehyung.

"You're old enough to think about your actions and its consequences. This private life of yours; I promise I'll keep my hands away from it, as long as you don't do anything stupid that might involve other members' or my attention to it. I promise, I'll support you and try my best to get the others' as well. Just that; always think about your position as a part of Bangtan and don't disappoint me, okay?".

"I promise I won't, hyung, thank you very much! That's all I ask from you. Thank y-"

Taehyung stops talking when they heard someone's at the door. Taehyung tells the person to come in and after the door is opened, shirtless Hoseok and Jimin appeared.

"Ahem, uh, excuse me, are you guys done? It's almost dinner time and we need to get a shower", Hoseok snorted.

"God, says the one who is prioritising his nudity for health's sake; nothing that I haven't seen before", Namjoon rolls his eyes before he stands up. "You're lucky we just finished talking".

Just when Namjoon is about to exit  the room, Taehyung calls for him.

"I- I really meant for what I said just now. And I hope you can forgive me like I do".

Namjoon gave him a meek smile. "Thank you, Taehyung . And yes, we're 0 - 0 now. Don't worry about that".

Between the silence filled the gap in the air..

"Ppoppo hae, ppoppo hae, ppoppo hae (go kiss, go kiss, go kiss)-".

And Hoseok gets a free hit on his head as a return from Namjoon.

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this chapter is kind of like a filler, sorry if it sucks but we have to wrap it up anyway. don't forget to vote and comment! ily my pretty little things xx

thoughts on this chapter?

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