The Beast Enslaved

❤ Catherina

Saturday came way too soon and before I knew what was happening, Carmen had me all dressed up in a short black dress with slender glittery straps holding it on my shoulders. She combined it with silver strappy high heels and a pretty glittering collier. It looked almost like a collar - most likely that was why Carmen stuck it on me. When I asked she just grinned.

AN: These aren't exact matches to what I'd envisioned, but just go with it 😉

"Now they'll leave you alone and you'll have no reason to desert me again."

I didn't point out that it was her who usually deserted me in the middle of a club full of Doms on the hunt for a sub for the night. Instead I brushed my fingers over it gratefully. This necklace was the kind of collar that would only be recognized as one by the people in the lifestyle. To them it meant I was taken, claimed. Kind of like a wedding ring. To everybody else it was just a fancy piece of jewlery that went exceptionally well with the dress I was wearing.

At the club we hit the dancefloor first. Carmen liked to scope out the subs before doing anything else. As it was, a pair of young men who just screamed the word submissive were grinding against eachother in the middle of the dance floor. I could see Carmen's eyes light up as she stalked over to them. I watched as she walked up to them and they both snapped to attention. Carmen said something to the both of them and they submissively dropped their heads. She wrapped herself around one of them while she motioned the other to grind against her butt. And that was that. I sighed.

It always ended like this sooner or later. Carmen chose a sub to persue and forgot all about me. Not that she wasn't a good friend. It was just that she tended to become a different person at the club.

So I ended up doing what I always did. I resided to sitting on one of the bar stools at the counter and stare deeply into my glass, contemplating life. Unlike Carmen, I didn't pick up men at the club. I had had a handful of Doms since I came to LA, something I would have never dreamed of under my father's reign in NYC. The first Dom I ever had was a gentle man who liked the controlling aspect of BDSM more than the sado-masochism one. He taught me how to behave and I was only too willing to comply. He didn't have to punish me once - and we were both happy for that. It lasted about a month. He said he saw me more as a little sister and couldn't go on completing sexual actions with me because it felt like incest. Cory was still a very close friend to this day. The way I knew him, he was sitting at home in front of a crackling fire with a good book in one hand and an even better wine in the other, his doting pet to his feet. I enjoyed my time with Cory, but when he broke it off, I had become strong enough to put myself in other Doms' hands. After Cory came Asher. Asher was harsh and strict and every bit as domineering as my father, but he was always fair. He taught me what it meant to stand up for mistakes made, and believe me when I say that with him I made a few. At the beginning of my time with Asher I was so charged up on the feeling of power I had with Cory, that I deliberately disobeyed and messed up over and over again to see how far I would get. It took two weeks and I was as compliant as a sheep. Finally after not even a full month, he got bored with me and passed me on to a friend of his, Josh. Josh was... Josh. He was level headed but strict, calm but passionate. I didn't love him and he didn't love me, but we lasted for the better part of a year. We were good together, in bed and out. With Josh I was able to practice all I had learned with Cory and Asher, and it worked well. In the end, it wasn't enough, for neither of us. Being together for a year with no romantic feelings whatsoever wasn't enough. And Josh proved it when he fell in love - however not with me. I ended it before either of us could get hurt. That was around ten months ago. I hadn't had a Dom since. Every now and again, Asher and I would land in bed, or his playroom, sometimes Josh even let me come play with him and his wife. For now, that was enough. I wasn't as desperate for love and attention as I was two years ago. I was capable of living mostly by myself, even if Carmen liked to boss me around every now and again. Looking back on the past two years, having my father arrested was the best thing I ever did. It freed me to be myself, and to find strength in that.

I let the melting ice cubes in my drink clink while I contemplated that thought.

"Trouble in the playroom?" A familiar voice asked.

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XOXO M