Change - (boyxboy)

Chapter 9 - Please Come Back

But he couldn't say that.

And that's why he was still at Oliver's, trying to pay attention to the motifs in The Crucible, while his boyfriend watched Top Gear, of all things.

"Can you turn that down a bit please, Ol?" Will asked, his brain was starting to hurt from having to listen to Jeremy Clarkson's voice.

"What's the matter with you?" Oliver asked in return as he turned down the volume of the TV.

"Nothing, just couldn't pay attention to the book with that being so loud," Will explained, skirting around what really was the matter. He really didn't want to get into anything right now.

"No, there's something up. Tell me what it is," Oliver pushed, swinging himself around so he could get a better look at his boyfriend on the floor, all his book spread out around him. The blonde had noticed the ever-growing aura of anger emanating from his boyfriend ever since they got back to school two weeks ago. He hadn't said anything, waiting for Will to just telling him what was on his mind, but it was Will, so that never happened. But he was getting sick of it, so they were gonna talk about it.

"Nothing," Will repeated, jotting down some points into his notebook.

"What a load of bull, Will. Don't give me that crap and just tell me what's on your mind," Oliver prodded on, trying to rein in his emotions.

Will looked at him intently in a sort of glare, an internal battle raging over whether he wanted things to blow up right now or not. Fuck it, he thought. It's on.

"Why'd you call me an effing queer yesterday?" Will accused, his glare intensifying.

"I-wha-no, I never called you that!" Oliver spluttered, shock clear on his face at the accusation.

Will scoffed, not believing him for a second. He hadn't wanted to bring this up, not in any mood to get into a fight with Oliver, but the blonde seemed so intent to sort things out and get into a fight, so here they went.

"Don't give me that crap, Ol," the brunette shot back. "I heard you yesterday with your friends. One of them pointed out that you were spending so much time with me and joked that we might be dating, and you, you, said, 'Nah, I wouldn't touch that fucking queer like that, that's so gross,'" he continued on, recounting what he'd heard. "And then you all laughed! What the fuck is wrong with you? What happened to you being all gung-ho about coming out and proclaiming your love for me from the rooftops?" he asking before spitting out, "You're the one who's a load of bull, Ol."

"Oi, don't go jumping down my throat, alright?" Oliver snapped back defensively. Will was completely right but the blonde wasn't taking any of Will's attitude. "You're not the one here who has to come out, ok? That's bloody terrifying for me!" he continued on, his voice getting more louder. "It was dumb of me to call you that, yeah, but I wasn't ready. So I panicked!"

"Panicked?!" Will repeated incredulously. "You always bloody panic!"

"Is this about the Vanessa thing again?" Oliver retorted, almost with a scoff, boiling his boyfriend's blood even further.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Will growled, hands curling into fists and turning ghost-white from the pressure. Where was this Oliver coming from, being all blase about all this?

"You said you understood and accepted that whole thing and you'd moved on from it!" the blonde exclaimed.

"Understanding and accepting about you flirting with that skank with her tits all up over you? Are you really that thick?!" his boyfriend exclaimed right back. "Seeing that hurt me so much, Oliver, but I didn't say anything 'cause you were talking about how scared you were about coming out and how guilty you felt about backing out of what you'd been telling me. I didn't say anything because I was being a supportive boyfriend to you, even though you hurt me, really bad. I care about you way more than I probably should, Oliver, but I don't really think you care about me as much as you say you do," Will ranted, muttering the last bit when his emotions got too much and he had to hold in his tears.

Oliver's lips stammered as he tried to work out what to say. "I do care about you!" he tried to reassure Will, continuing on with, "I care about us, I swear!"

"Have you told Stacey about us yet then?" Will asked, rubbing at his eyes to wipe away some falling tears. He was kicking himself inside for crying. He was stronger than this, dammit.

"I... no, I haven't told her yet," Oliver admitted quietly, eyes cast down in shame. Of himself. Of his stupidity. Of his idiocy. Of what a shameful human being he'd been.

Will nodded slowly before beginning to collect his books around him and piling them up, sniffling every few seconds.

"What are you doing?" Oliver asked, though he already had an inkling of what was going to happen.

"I, umm, I think I'm gonna head home," Will replied, his voice raspy from his restrained emotions, as he pulled his school bag out from under the bed and dumping it in.

The blonde's heart sank into his stomach as he watched his boyfriend packing his things up. "Are you leaving me?" he asked, expressing what his heart was feeling, dreading that it was true.

Will looked at him, thinking about it. He hadn't really thought it through. Was this it? The break-up?

"No," he answered. "I-uh, I just need a break for a bit, I think. Some space so I can think. And you can too. Decide if you wanna actually commit to this or not," he explained, standing up and hefting his school bag onto his back.

"How are you gonna get home?" Oliver questioned, eyes flicking to his clock to look at the time. Worry set in as he saw it was nearing 1am and Will was about to venture out with no way of getting home.

Will grabbed his phone off the bedside table, showing it to Oliver, and said, "I'll call someone." The blonde nodded, not having much else to say. They waited in tense silence for a few moments before Will cleared his throat. "I'll see you later," he said, turning around and heading out the room.

"Bye," Oliver rasped, about to cry as he watched his boyfriend walking out the door. A big part within him felt like that that was the last time he'd ever see Will again. Will would break up with him and it would all be his fault 'cause he was such an idiot.

He so badly wanted to jump up and race after Will, begging him to come back and never leave him. But he knew that that wouldn't work. He had to let Will go.

He just hoped that he'd come back.

Please come back.