Secrets (An Andy Biersack Love Story)~[Completed]

21. Cold

Alice's PoV:

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You know that feeling when you do something so small, and then it leads you to something so huge? That's what I've remembered every time I was with my friends . . . Alone.

Now I was on a bus, just finished wrestling Andy, who've I found out who lied to me about his identity, that I met only a few days ago because I just skipped their concert. I just want to be friends and here he was, kissing me like there's no tomorrow.

Every feeling seemed to rush through me. I thought he was just going to play funny and kiss me on the cheek or something! But, no. Oh, no! He has to go and put his cold freaking lips on mine! I didn't care if my friends were here. Andy's band have become my friends. Yeah. I'm friends with Black Veil Brides. A position any girl would want. Actually, I bet any girl would want the position I'm currently in right now. Kissing Andy freaking Biersack. Well, almost any girl.

Any girl but me.

Every single thought rushed through my head. I mean, it's my first kiss. I never kissed Zach. Zach usually was the more. . ."physical" type of guy. We only dated two weeks. Two, cold, stupid, lame, and awkward weeks. Zach and I were just friends, then he went and asked me to date him right out of the blue! I think he just wanted to date me to . . . Well, you get the idea.

I hate this moment. Andy's lip ring was even warmer than his lips! My eyes were still open. Andy's were closed tight, as if for desperation for me to do something. I honestly couldn't do anything. That's all I did, was just stand here, shocked with my heart beating miles and miles a second. This wasn't shock. This was adrenaline that was just overheated by something more. Something I couldn't place. Every single memory I remember flooded back into my mind.

It didn't matter if it was something good or bad. I remember everything. I remember Max. I remember the accident that happened in the crash. How Max was always bullied in school. How I lied to Andy and everybody about the car accident. How Max ran away. How I would meet Max every week, secretly. Max was my only brother. He was a year older than me. He ran away because everyone treated him badly. The crash was just his escape. Everything he did was for the best, but everyone just hates that he was an "emo." I miss him. I haven't seen him all week. He'd always call. We'd always meet up. It was our little secret. Not even my mom or dad knew. Well, they know, they just want to know where we always meet. They need to see him again. My brother is just scared.

I hated this moment. It's why I never loved. It was the same night me and Zach broke up. He broke up with me because he thought I was a liar. He lied too, though. All he did was call me over to his house that night. He was talking to the two girls he got pregnant. I remember the minutes we spent together that morning. How he put his arm around me. It was a loving way to tell me he was sorry. It's one of the reasons I never loved again. He called that night and told me to go over to his house in the morning. He hugged me. It was as if every memory wanted to be screamed out. I never loved again because if it happens, all the lies want to come out over guilt. I just know I can't love someone without having to tell them the truth to such a huge lie. Andy has already told me everything.

I also don't want to love him because if he lied, what if I kept my life? I just can't do that to him.

The world slowly started to come back to me. How long had it been? It felt like hours. I think it was only a few seconds though. My eyes slowly came from the world of my life to Andy's closed eyes. I'll have to admit it sometime, but he looked at peace. I'll admit he was very hot. I'll admit I've seen him once a year ago on my friends shirt. I'll admit I forgot it was him when I first saw him. I'll admit I listened to the mix tape my friends da got me. I'll admit I wished it had a cover to their album. I'll admit I wished it didn't have a blue cover. I'll admit I missed the face to the Black Veil Brides tape. I'll admit I lived Andy's voice in the music. I'll admit I loved it because it made me think every night about how I missed my brother. I'll admit to everything! I'll admit that I even like this kiss! I just can't admit every truth to every lie I've said to Andy!