All We Were

Heartbreak all over.

Sprig didn't stop until she was parked in her driveway. She had thought that if she could run away from the entire situation, the weight in her chest would subside.

She was wrong. Dead wrong.

Tears puddled in her eyes and began to slowly trickle down and land softly on the steering wheel.

She knew she was acting like an idiot. She'd already slept with Caleb, why wouldn't dating be the hard part?

It was. She had thought she'd healed, that she could handle seeing him again. That being with him would further heal this hole she had in her chest.

A part of him did. A part of him made her feel so alive, and that was why she was running away like the coward she felt she was.

Sometimes heartache happens in situations you least expect it.

Sprig remembered the day. It had started like every other day that year. She woke up, readied herself for another boring day at school.

She had smiled that morning, thinking after the last bell, she'd go and find Caleb and they'd go fund trouble all on their own.

He had been a year older than her and at seventeen and eighteen they had caused all kinds of hell. Caleb had been such a bad boy and one that she couldn't resist.

They had spent many wild, booze filled nights locked in each other's arms... Among other things.

Which is what had led her to the moment right after third block. She would remember that day for as long as she would live.

She had just sat down and began working on a note she was going to boldly pass to her friend Jeanne, boldly talking about Mrs. Peterson, when it started to happen.

At first, she thought she had eaten something bad at lunch, but thirty minutes into class she couldn't focus on the note.

Fifteen minutes after that the pain became more intense and she had to excuse herself. She ran to the bathroom, where she heaved up whatever was in stomach.

She thought maybe that would solve all her issues but it had only made the cramping worse. So she undid her pants and sat down on the toilet.

There was blood everywhere. Everywhere, in her underwear, her pants, clots were falling out into the toilet.

Sprig really thought she was dying so she did the only thing a seventeen year old would do.

She called her sister.

It seemed like decade before she heard the bathroom's door swing open. Enya called out to her and Sprig weakly sobbed out for her.

Enya slowly opened the stall door and seen what was taking place. Enya was nineteen and had already graduated so she gathered Sprig off the seat and helped her put her pants on.

Once at the office she signed Sprig out claiming that she was ill and had a doctor's appointment.

The rest was a chaotic blurr but Enya Pulled into the hospital and got her to the emergency room. They seen her quickly for a Thursday.

Enya did all the talking, since it was apparent that Sprig couldn't even speak through the pain. She had curled up into a ball and was quietly sobbing.

Enya tried her best to comfort her sister, and while Sprig was glad, she was terrified of what was happening.

An hour after being admitted and having blood and everything under the sun done, a doctor came in.

"Sprig? We found out what is going on and I'd like to talk to you if that's okay?" The young doctor asked calmly.

"Am I going to die?" Was all she could think to ask.

"No, you're going to be just fine. I regret to inform you that one of tests we ran came up positive. Your pregnancy test came back positive for HCG. The hormone found in a pregnancy. The blood test put your hormone levels at about eight weeks pregnant."

Holy shit. Her life was over, was all she could think of in that moment.

The doctor continued, "but with all the blood and clotting, I want to have an ultrasound done to see what's going on in there okay?"

Sprig felt like the blood had drained completely from her face, and judging by Enya's facial expressions, she was just as shocked.

A few moments passed by and a technician entered her room, wheeling in an ultrasound machine.

She was another young person, short with long blonde hair. She smiled meekly at Sprig. "Hi Sprig, I won't take too long okay? If you could lift your gown up, I'd like to take a peek into your belly."

Sprig lifted her hospital gown up and the technician tucked a warm towel into her panty line and then spurted warm gel onto her abdomen.

She then picked up something that was a cross between a wand and computer mouse and began rolling it around her stomach, pausing every few second to click away at the keyboard.

Sprig couldn't see the screen, and the technician didn't give away any clues as to what she was seeing and it was agonizing to Sprig has the minutes ticked on.

Finally, the technician took another warm towel and wiped away the gel and began packing up. She smiled and said that the doctor would be in soon.

Twenty more minutes passed before the young doctor returned. He came in and sat down, lacing his fingers together he sighed.

"I regret to inform you Sprig, that while we do think you were a bit further than eight weeks, because of the size of you uterus, that the baby's heart stopped beating and that's what's causing the bleeding and clots. There will be more tissue that will pass and eventually the bleeding will lessen. I am very sorry for your loss."

Sprig had stopped listening after he had said the baby's heart had stopped beating. She could only blame herself for not paying attention to her cycles, and worse, for not having safe sex with Caleb.

Her whole world was crumbling. First she had thought her life was over because she would be bringing a kid into this world, and now her heart was breaking because a piece of her was missing.

She left the hospital in a silent daze, trying to process the events that had just transpired.

Later that evening after locking herself in her room, Caleb knocked.

She opened the door for him and launched herself into his arms.

"Nice to see you too Babe. What's going on? Enya called me and told me it was urgent. You sick or something?"

She burst into tears, scrambling for the words to tell him.

He began to looked worried after she couldn't find the words.

It was now or never, the words spilled out in one breath. "I was pregnant and now I'm not."

Caleb sat there, minutes ticking by. At first he looked shocked, then disgusted, and finally he looked cold. Distant.

The atmosphere between them changed and without a word, a hug, or a condolence, he got up and left.

And for the second time that day her heart broke and it completely destroyed her.

She spent the rest of the school year either in trouble, or skipping to be away from him. She couldn't even be around their friends. Eventually everything about her changed and she started doing things to feel something more than the numbness she was feeling.

She began finding comfort in women. Men. Sometimes both and trying to figure out what she was doing in her life.

That year forever changed her and it took years for her to start feeling human again. It took years to get over the pain of every thing she had lost in one day.

Now he was back and wanting to fix things and it scared her. Would he leave again?