The Rockstar Chronicles

The Song

Blew you a kiss goodbye

I blew you a kiss goodbye.

Then you went your way,

And I can't even cry,

bidding you farewell,

With a kiss goodbye.

Yeah, they took you away,

I was too late to try,

bidding you farewell,

With a kiss goodbye.

The guitar stopped and in the silence he sang the final words.

Now I wonder why,

Tell myself a lie,

When we said hello,

Was it a kiss goodbye?

After the last strains died away, everyone fell silent. The lyrics reminded me of Ryder. A lump formed in my throat and the sharp sting of tears came to my eyes. I glanced at Ryder and he turned away quickly, laughing at something someone had said.

I shivered in the dark, treading water.

#

My final days passed quicker than I had ever imagined they would and before I knew it, fall was upon us. As I waited in the air-conditioned recording booth, watching the heat waves roll off the concrete sidewalk outside, I thought about how quickly the summer had flown by.

I had once thought it would last forever.

Only a few more years and I'll be free, I thought. No one will be able to tell me what to do.

But somehow, this time, it didn't make me feel better. I just felt lonely.

"Ready, Lindy?" the man asked through the microphone and I nodded, waiting for the music.

My part wasn't large, I only echoed a few lines in harmony with the boys and hummed a few bars, but in years to come, every time I heard that song on the radio, I would think of those heat waves rolling off the concrete and the smell of mimosa trees in the middle of the summer.

#

Nerves were on edge that final week. I felt like I was on the verge of a panic attack constantly and I'm pretty sure the boys felt the same way. We began to snap at each other over every little thing.

"Not like that, Bridge," Hardyn groaned. "Are you ever going to get it?"

"I'm doing my best, Hardyn," Bridge replied, but even he sounded stressed.

"What about the lyrics to that second song, Hardyn? Have you got them down yet?" Ryder asked. "Because we're going to look like idiots of we mess it up."

"I've done this, like, a thousand times," Hardyn shot back. "I'm the last person you need to be worried about. What about Tom? Or Grady? They've never performed in front of a crowd as big as this one will be. They might freeze up."

Bridge glared at him and Ryder rolled his eyes. "Way to give them stage fright, jerk."

"Hey, now," Tom said. "Let's not get into name calling."

"I'm sure you don't want to," Hardyn chuckled. "Since we could think of a million for you."

"Leave Tom alone," Grady said, rising to his feet with clenched fists. "He never did anything to you. Neither did I."

"You did when you joined this band," Ryder said. "You asked us to trust you."

"And you can," Tom jumped in.

"Just get along, already?" I groaned, sinking back in my seat and covering my eyes. I have to say, I was the most effective. I really brought them together as a band.

Against me.

"You don't even want to be here," Hardyn scoffed at me. "Grady told us."

I glared at my brother. "Grady!"

"Sorry," Grady said, but then he scowled. "But it's true. You don't."

"How do we know you won't sabotage us?" Hardyn asked.

"Um, because you know me and I won't," I said.

"But you were planning on leaving us all summer and you never said anything," Bridge said.

I glanced at Tom for backup but he looked away.

"Are you serious?" I asked. "Are you really doing this right now?"

"You made us think you were in this with us," Ryder said. I could tell by the hard set of his mouth that he was mad. "You made me think..."

"What, Ryder? What did I make you think?" All the times he had led me on only to back off at the last minute came to mind and I glared at him, challenging him to blame me.

"That you were going to stay," Ryder said evenly.

"Look, guys, I'm sorry, okay?" I threw up my hands in the air. "Mom signed the contract and I'm stuck here now so why can't we just all get along?"

We all lapsed into angry silence.

We were getting good at that.

#

The final week was a nightmare. I don't know how much sleep I got, but I doubt it added up to two full nights. If we weren't at practice or rehearsal, we were in costume fittings, taking photographs (I escaped every one of those), doing interviews (I just had to watch, not participate, besides telling the world what an awesome brother Grady was as I gave him a death glare), and a million other things. We didn't have time to do anything fun.

And then the week was over and it was time for the show to go on.

***I hope you enjoyed this section! What did you think of Lindy's lyrics? We're getting ready for the end guys!!!!