Spiritual Networking

Spiritual Networking - Chapter 10

i’m afraid that once my wall is gone

u'll just walk away

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:
u have nothing to fear
i’m not going anywhere
:-)
and i will wait until u r ready
to meet me

MilliVanilli:
:-)

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:
BUT i won’t give up!!!!

MilliVanilli:
:-)

Tuesday after the staff meeting, Pastor Davis asked Paul to stick around and talk. This was not uncommon. Pastor Davis cared about everyone on his staff. He was Paul’s mentor and a good sounding board for thoughts and ideas.

“We haven’t talked since Sunday, how do you feel that you did?” Pastor Davis was a sincere man. He was nearing sixty, but still had a  lot of life and energy.

“I think it went good. I was happy with the outcome.” Three people had come forward for the prayer of salvation afterwards, and Paul considered each one a success.

“Yes, I was very pleased. You did great. And if I was honest, I even enjoyed the texting thing you did. Although at first I wasn’t sure how that would go over. But, everyone seemed to like it. Maybe I will consider doing that from time to time.” Pastor Davis smiled a heart warming smile and Paul knew he was truly pleased.

Then, he took a deep breath and said, “It has come to my attention,” Pastor Davis looked away, “that you are, I don’t even know the words to say... I guess the best is ‘involved’ with a girl you met on the Internet.”

“Wait. Did Sydney say something to you about this?” Paul could not believe she would go to her father, his boss over Millie. He thought she was OK with them not being together. Was this because she couldn’t have him? Was she trying to sabotage anyone else that wanted a relationship with him? He tried to control his thoughts and attitude. He took a deep breath in hopes of calming down.

“Paul, she is worried about you.”

“Pastor! Is this because she is jealous?” Paul sprang to his feet and began pacing. “We didn’t work out. She is like my sister. But I thought she was over this. Really Pastor, I thought she understood.”

“Now hold on Paul. She has told me you and her are not, and are never going to be together. So, I don’t think she is trying to hurt you. I think she is truly worried for you.” Pastor Davis took a deep breath, “Now come back over here and sit down, please.”

“Pastor, I am sorry. Sydney has it in her head that all Millie is going to do is hurt me. But, I know her, she won’t do anything to hurt me intentionally, like I wouldn’t hurt her.”

“OK, tell me about Millie. No matter what, I care about you and your ministry. And maybe I can help you in some way.” Pastor Davis’ eyes were pleading asking Paul to open up. He had always had a way of getting people to talk. Paul admired that, especially now when he was on this side of the desk.

“We met on line over a year ago, we have been honest with each other one hundred percent. She is the smartest, funniest and most caring person I have ever met.”

“So, when did you meet, in person I mean?”

“That’s it, we haven’t. We met online. At first I thought maybe she didn’t live close to me, and she told me we could never meet anyway... because of her fears and phobia.”

“What type of phobia?” Pastor Davis leaned back in his chair watching Paul and taking in everything the young pastor said.

“Without getting into all the details, something happened to her that made her afraid of people and contact with them. So, she stays in her apartment and only comes out when she has to. And when she does, it is normally at night and wearing a hoodie covering her face.”

“I see.” Pastor Davis steepled his fingers at his lips.

“Until Sunday, I thought she lived far away. I knew she went to college in Atlanta, but I never expected her to still live here.”

“How do you know she lives here?”

Paul smiled, “She came to hear me preach.” He shook his head in wonder, his eyes looked past Pastor Davis like he was remembering, “She has been watching our streaming services for a year now, sometimes we watch them at the same time and she asks questions,” again a smile crossed Paul’s face. “She always has questions, mostly about how our services are different than the services she grew up attending.”

Paul took another deep breath, “But, she knew more than anything I wanted her here to watch me preach, and she came. Later, when we met online, I confronted her about living close and she said that she didn’t want to give me hope when she was scared.”

“You really do care about her don’t you?” Pastor Davis leaned forward putting his arms on the desk and not clasping his hands on the rich mahogany desktop.

“More than anything. And I knew she cared about me before Sunday. But her taking the risk to come, well that proved it to me.”

“Well son, it looks like you need to take your own advice!” Pastor Davis said with a smile.

“My advice?” Paul looked puzzled.

“You can’t help her overcome her fears without baby steps. Help her learn to walk again.” Pastor Davis nodded his head like in dismissal. Paul was halfway to the door when he spoke again, “And Paul, you have my blessing. But, don’t take it out on Sydney, she is just worried about you.”

“Yes sir, I will try.” Paul turned to walk out and he left the church without stopping by Sydney’s office. He wasn’t mad at her, but he was very disappointed and thought it might be best for both of them to cool off a little.