Swing Life Away [Kellic]

Chapter Eight

It has been a couple weeks since my nightmare. It hadn't stopped there. I was haunted by the same dream almost every night. It was always the same dream. Vic would be missing, and the official looking people with no faces would take Copeland away. I'd wake up every time in a cold sweat and with a heavy weight on my chest. Sometimes, I woke up by myself and stayed up for the rest of the night tossing and turning. Other times, I'd be roused from my dreams by Vic. Those times meant I was starting to shout and scream in my sleep and he had to stop me before I woke the baby. Childishly, I'd ask him to spend the rest of the night in bed with me.

This did nothing but make the confused little feelings I had for even more intense as the days go by. He never made a big deal about our strange little relationship but it never left my mind for a second. Whenever I saw how happy Copeland was with him, the more I felt like I needed to have him around. I'm doing a horrible job at describing my feelings right now because that was how muddled up I was inside. I wanted us to be something else, but something was holding me back and I couldn't quite put my finger on what.

"Hey, can I ask you something?" I plopped down on the floor one night beside Vic, making him jump and look up from his reading. Copeland had been sent to sleep already so it was just us and peace and quiet.

"Yeah, sure," he said. "What's up?"

"How did you find out you were gay?" I asked, not letting myself beat around the bush.

Vic put down the book he was reading, contemplating his answer. "I dunno, really. I just never felt for a girl the way I felt for a boy," he replied in measured words. "One time I was fooling around with a bunch of friends and I kissed a boy and it just felt...right. I've tried hooking up with girls before but it never felt right. That's how I knew," he concluded. "Why are you asking?"

I shrugged. "I've just been feeling rather confused lately," I admitted, mumbling my words.

"Ah, I see," he said. Then he gave a teasing grin. "Who's the special guy?"

I choked on my spit. My cheeks flushed red hot as I sputtered in a failed attempt to regain my dignity. Vic found it mildly amusing, chuckling at my suffering.

"Well, I'm glad you've found someone, sorta," Vic smiled kindly. "He must be really cute if he can steal your heart," Vic commented casually, returning to his book.

"Yeah, he is," I murmured, watching Vic chew on his lip distractedly as he concentrated on the words before him. If only he knew exactly how cute that guy really is.

"Ah, so there is a boy," Vic spoke up like a teenage girl's best friend, not looking up from his book. "Tell me about him. Where and when did you meet him?"

I blinked a few times. Oh boy, this is going to be tough. I might as well do it, there's no point avoiding it. "I met him more than a month ago," I answered, watching his response. He only nodded, still reading. "I, uh, I met him right outside the apartment," I continued. He didn't seem to have connected the dots yet and every second was killing me. "It was dark and it was raining and I offered to let him stay the night in my apartment. He said yes, and I've been seeing him every day since," I pressed on.

By then, Vic got the message and he was staring at the page before him in shock. It took him three seconds to move from his frozen stance to look at me. "You're serious," he said. It was more of a statement than a question.

I nodded solemnly.

"I'm not that cute," he murmured, the tiniest hint of a smile on his lips. "I'm not worth it, Kellin."

I shrugged. "It wasn't exactly a conscious choice," I told him. "But the very least you can do is help me find out whether it's right or not. Because it has been messing with my head for some time now."

"So what do you want me to do?"

"Kiss me," I said, looking him in the eye.

"Are you sure?" He asked.

I nodded again. "I need to know, Vic," I pleaded.

"Okay," he said. He put his book on the floor and moved in nearer to me. We both leaned in and I felt like I was in a teenage movie cliché.

He closed the distance between us. There weren't any fireworks. It was a hundred times better. The butterflies in my stomach were fluttering more violently than they've ever had before. His lips were soft and sweet, but there were electric shocks running up and down my spine. Something clicked. In my head, a puzzle piece was placed down. A shattered window was restored. It felt...right. Damn.

Our lips parted, but we kept close proximity. My lungs seemed to have stopped working and my mind was running wild.

"How did it feel?" Vic asked me, his breath tickling my cheek.

"It felt right," I breathed. "You?"

"I can't say I didn't like it," he whispered back.

"Can we do that again?" I asked.

The question had barely left my lips when I felt his again. The electric shocks and butterflies were back. They only intensified as the kiss got deeper. I wasn't complaining at all. I could get addicted to the feeling. It ended all too soon when Vic moved away.

"I'm not worth it," Vic repeated his earlier words. "You're too good, and I'm just a bag of broken bones."

I shrugged. "We're all a little broken inside," I stated matter-of-factly. "And you're perfect, Vic. We'll make this work."

"Okay," he murmured as I rested my forehead against his.

"Now, could we go back to kissing? Because, frankly, it's quite addictive," I told him.

He giggled. "Of course."

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