Emeralds

Forty-two.

I wake up the next day feeling an awful headache. I get up from the bed with difficulty and pull my legs to the bathroom. I wash my face with cold water and brush my teeth then come out to find Leen sitting on a chair in the balcony.
"Morning!" she says turning around to face me. It's scary what blind people can hear. Seriously. I was walking absolutely soundlessly--at least that's what I thought.
"Morning," I say with a sudden grimace at the headache.
"What's wrong?" she asks, getting up and walking towards me. She can even hear my face expressions in my voice. I guess people who do not see are not easy to hide anything from, they are better at catching people than we are, their concentration ability is pretty amazing, their reflex actions and level of accuracy is unbelievable.
"I have a terrible headache," I say holding my head, thinking it will probably explode or shoot off.
"I put the painkiller Ahmed brought in the drawer, wait I'll get it for you."
"Okay."
I wait as she fishes around one of the drawers. She finds it and walks with her hand in front of her, hanging low, not to run into anything. She hands me the medicine and I take a pill followed by a glass of water that has been on the desk.
"Lee, massage my head," I say holding her arm before she leaves. "It might make it better."
She smirks and pulls her hand away playfully, "You were really mean last night, why should I help you?"
"You can't be that bad!" I exaggerate.
"You started it," she shrugs.
"Ugh," I roll my eyes. "Fine, whatever."
"I'll massage your head when you say it."
"I won't," I smirk.
"Fine then," she walks towards the balcony again.
Well, I loved messing with her, but I really need the massage right now. "Lee! Saranghae!"
She laughs loudly--really loudly. "You're amazing, seriously!" She walks back to me and I catch her midway. I guide her to the chair at the desk, and sit on the floor in front of her.
"Now work," I say leaning my head back on her knees, and she starts massaging my head with her long and slim fingers delicately. Her hands are cold, dropping down the burning temperature of my own forehead.

She keeps doing that for a long time, and meanwhile the painkiller starts working as well and I gradually feel better.

"Do you wanna watch a kdrama?" I ask her.
"Watch?" The thing is, we haven't really watched anything or even turned on the TV at home since the accident. But why not? She can still hear, and I can tell her what's going on.
"Yeah," I say enthusiastically. "What about you re-watch That Winter The Wind Blows?" I remember Mariam watching it like Leen before we got married. I remember it was about a blind girl.
"That?" she asks absentmindedly. "Did you watch it before?"
"I saw Mariam watching it once, long time ago."
"It's about a blind girl," she says almost to herself. "Should we watch it?"
"I think we do," I nod. Mariam has told me the entire plot when she was watching it. I remember lying on the bed, trying to sleep, when Mariam would break into the room and keep telling infinite stories, about her friends, her friends' friends, her friends' husbands and fiancés. She once told me about her friend's golden fish, I'm not kidding. She would talk all the time I'm home, since we were kids, she just talks, all the time, about anything. When she was watching that drama--or any drama or movie or cartoon by the way--she kept me updated with the events, like I cared, or actually fully listened. But I remember some of the things she had said about that drama. The girl, Oh Young, lives with her father's secretary, she's a tough woman, whom the father has chosen over Young's mother. The mother left the house with Young's older brother, Oh Soo, when they were too young, and they haven't met since then. A while later, the girl became blind. All the time it talks about how people use her for the fact that she can't see, although she's really smart. It shows her insecurities as a blind person, her innocence, and how she gets in trouble because of her handicap. However, it shows how blind people are still capable of living through the hardship, how their life never stops just because it's dark. It shows they can still read and use the computer and smartphones if they learn to. Oh Young talks about her handicap all along in a bitterly sarcastic way, she's so realistic, she says what's on every blind person's mind. Leen will connect to that; she will relate and she will feel it in her bones, and she needs that. She needs to know her life is not easy, she needs to know the not-so-beautiful truth. But she also needs to know that her life goes on whether the surgery succeeds or not, she needs to know that there will be people who'll use her out there, but there are also others that will sacrifice everything for her. She has to know it all. Maybe watching a drama heroine--even if it's just a drama--like her, she will want to be the heroine of her own life, she will not just subside to the margins because she feels like she's lacking something. Focusing on her handicap will make her find out many of its side, and she'll think about the whole thing from more than just one narrow perspective.

We watch four episodes in a row, munching on chips and gummy bears Mariam have brought us.

"It's been a while since I watched it, I don't really remember how they look or what the theme is like."
"It's a bit gloomy and less bright than other dramas we've watched," I say. "The male lead is--"
"Of course I remember him!" she says in a high pitched tone. I look at her irritatedly and snatch the pack of chips from her hands. She reaches out for it.
"Hey! What's that?!"
"Remember him," I snort, focusing back on the mobile screen.

It's a scene where the male lead brings the girl cotton candy and they eat it.
"What is happening?" Leen asks shaking my arm.
"He got her cotton candy," I say, "and he bends to eat with her."
"Aaah," she squeals, "he's falling for her. How does he look at her?"
"I. . . don't know," I say tilting my head a bit in thought. "Lovingly?"
"Awww," she shrieks, piercing my ears.
"I'm deafened Leen! For God's sake!"
"That is so cute!"
"You know I didn't want you to watch it for the love story. . ."
"But it's good," she mumbles.
"Let's watch," I say in defeat, putting some chips in my mouth.

"You know what?" she says after a while. "I really love watching dramas with you, they're totally different then, better actually. And now I even love hearing what happens from you." I smile and she goes on, "I faintly remember a scene in this drama when he watches TV with her, he tells her what happens just like you're doing now. I thought it was the cutest thing when I first saw it, I never imagined it'd happen to me."
"Well, that means you have a life like kdramas?" I laugh.
"I guess so," she says excitedly.

I keep thinking that before marrying Leen I would have never thought of doing the things I do now. I wouldn't have watched romantic shows or read girly books or combed someone's hair and tied their hijab. I would have never liked it in a million years, but I admit that although it's still pretty weird to me, unusual and quite silly, I really love and enjoy it. Not for anything but for Leen herself, she made me love what she loves, and I'm pretty okay with that.

Girls are not silly, they are not some squeaky creatures--at least not all the time--like some men think. Girls, no matter how moody, easily angered, childish, dramatic, unexpected, jealous, and sometimes indirect, they are actually simple. As simple as a word of reassurance, an act of caring, sharing of interests and good times, even sharing of problems. All you need to do is be there for them, think of the small things like they do, they actually affect them more than bigger things.

After marrying Leen, and when I started to put as much thought into my life with her as I put into work, sports, money, and other things I care about, I found out it's not too hard to be happy. Girls are overthinking all the time, and some thinking from your behalf puts their minds at rest.

Later in the day, I receive an e-mail from Omar attached with some files I need to work on. While I'm taking a look at the files I receive another e-mail, from Dr. Herrmann. I read it carefully. It says the surgery will be in a week, and that week is scheduled for loads of tests and checkups.

No matter how I try to be positive about it, I really want Leen to see again. It's unthinkable, the seventy percent of failure.

~~~

Now that was quick! :D
About 4 chapters are left, I'll try to make them long like this one. I hope you enjoyed it though; and forgive any mistakes.
I want to really thank you for everything, and for reading, because I really enjoyed writing this story, and I enjoyed your feedbacks. I'm glad everyone of you has been reading my work, and I hope I haven't disappointed you.
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Nouran.