Beyond Words

Sixth

My Zaira Leigh,

Our hearts mourn for you every single day. Sa sobrang lungkot ko nang gabing iyon ay pinili kong matulog sa kwarto na 'yon. I imagined myself sleeping with you again and it makes me forget the longing for a while. I imagined your beautiful smiling face, your sparkling eyes, your soft skin enveloping mine. I also imagined you saying sweet words that will always melt my heart.

By imagining those, I can at least tell you how much I love you dearly. For the remaining years that you will be with us, I never said those and I know you are waiting for that.

Forgive me my wife. Please forgive me.

My heart aches when I found myself remembering what I have done to you. Parang hindi ako makahinga sa tuwing naaalala ko ang mga 'yon, Zaira. I just suddenly got down on my knees and ask God for forgiveness what I have done to you. I was just holding your picture and cried my heart out.

Sometimes, I already want to just give my life up because I badly want to be with you, but I am always reminding myself that I have to responsible for what you left me -- our blessings in life -- our kids. They're my hope now, wife.

Babawi ako sa lahat ng mga ginawa ko sa 'yo sa pamamagitan ng mga anak natin.

--X.M. Del Valle

--//--

It is one of the nights that I know she would love not to go to sleep and just tell endless stories to me. This kind of bonding is what I really love aside from making love to her.

I closed my eyes tightly. I can feel her presence again...

"Xander... Xander!" I heard her called me and I opened my eyes and she was sitting right beside me now.

"Hmm?"

"Ang ganda ng buwan 'no?" She pointed up and look at the night skies. But I chose to look at her. "Xander, ganyan ang pagmamahal ko sa inyo ng mga anak natin. Kahit saan pa 'yan, kahit ano'ng lugar pa 'yan... nand'yan pa rin. Buong-buo. Maliwanag. Hindi nababawasan."
"I know, my wife..."

Humarap siya sa akin at ngumiti. "Tulog ka na. May pasok ka pa bukas. Kailangan mo ng sapat na oras ng pahinga para bukas." She kissed me before she stood up. "I love you, Hub." She slowly fades while waving at me.

It was indeed a magical night...