Beyond Words

Fifth

My Zaira Leigh,

I really miss those days that I will arrive from work and be greeted by you -- my wife, my love, my peace. Everything was at peace whenever I see you helping the kids do their homeworks, making their milks before they go to sleep and telling our youngest bedtime stories. Yes, I've been listening to those too and honestly, I am stalking the both of you and sometimes, Lexus will ask you to sleep by your side and I really can't help but to smile everytime he is using his puppy-dog eyes just to convince you to sleep by your side. Of course, you can't refuse because he used that style on you.

I also remember those times that you will open the door of my -- our room and let yourself watch me for minutes and I could hear you silently crying and gently closes the door before you will go back to your room and sleep.

Again, I let myself be enveloped by what you've done.

And again... I am so sorry.

But most of all... I love you. I love you.

--X.M. Del Valle

//-//

This time I forced myself to go to the guest-room -- where she chooses to sleep. I smiled bitterly when I opened the door. Her scent stays here but I can still feel her presence. She's not here anymore but I can feel myself hugged by her at my back.

"Xander... 'Wag ka nang umiyak. Nalulungkot rin ako. Just let the kids be the source of your happiness, okay? Sayang lang kasi hindi ako nand'yan para sa inyong tatlo. Pero, nandito ulit ako dahil nangungulila ka na naman sa akin. Mahal na mahal ko kayo, tatandaan niyo 'yan."

Jusy how the wind flew over the window, that's also how I felt empty again...