Nothing Really Matters

Chapter Seven ~ Stewards Inquiry

Flashback ~

My hands are grasping to the mares mane as I push her on to the final fence. We've got this one in the bag. The heavy ground spirals up to meet us and I'm grateful for my goggles. My only view of the fence is through the ears of the fast moving mare.

"Looks like you've got this one Conway." a jockey behind me shouted as we approached the final fence. A small smirk appeared on my face.

It all happened so fast. I set the mare up for the fence perfectly and I began to fold into my crouched jumping position. For a split second the smile grew on my face as we sailed over the fence however the landing was going to have me in tears. With the ground being so wet the little mare was unable to hold us after the jump. As her hooves dug into the ground her knees started to buckle and she came crashing down. The last thing I remember was a thud on the back of my helmet.

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I come back to my senses to realise I'm in Paddy's jeep driving like a mad woman to the nearest hospital. I need to know Jack's okay. When I tried to reach him on the track the medical team had gotten in before me. They put an oxygen mask on his pale, lifeless face. As they began to move him onto a stretcher and into the ambulance I quickly followed.

"I'm sorry" one of the ambulance crew began. She looked at me sympathetically. "due to his condition we can't bring anyone in the ambulance with us. We need all the room we can incase..." her words drifted off.

"incase what?!" I shouted feeling more frustrated by the second. I glanced over at Jack as they took him up on the ambulance. He looked like a ragdoll.

"incase he needs to be resuscitated." she finished quickly and ran off to the ambulance.

So now I'm here. Driving to the hospital to see him.

I pull the jeep into a free parking spot and sit for a second afraid of what I might find in the hospital. Hospitals and I go way back. Firstly the weeks in a coma, the weeks in recovery and then the monthly check ups for six months after that. I silently pray that Jack doesn't have to go through that. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. I take a deep breath and bag all of the courage I can muster up. Stepping out of the jeep and entering the big building I'm hit straight away with the familiar smell of disinfectant and sickness. That alone makes me want to turn and head back to the jeep but I remind myself why I'm here. Who I'm here for.

I approach the front desk to see a middle aged woman typing frantically on a computer. I open my mouth to speak, the words are there but I can't voice them. The receptionist pauses her string of typing aware someone is looking at her, looking up at me from under her glasses.

"Can I help you?" She enquired slightly irritated.

"Um, yes. I'm here to see Jack. Jack Longwood I mean. He came in an ambulance from the races." The woman types on her computer once again and returns to look at me.

"he's in surgery at the moment. Take a seat and I'll get the doctor to call you when he's finished." A faint smile was all I could give her as thanks.

Sitting on one of the chairs in the waiting room I wonder why they make them so uncomfortable. I mean the least they could do for people is give them comfortable chairs to sit on while they wait for what might seem like eternity. I stop my train of thought as I realise I'm avoiding it. This gnawing thought that I just can't shake. There was something funny about the race. Something out of the ordinary. Jack's been riding Imperial Dust all season. He knows how to ride him. When to stay and when to go. So why didn't he let him run? It was the perfect time to let the gears go up and to move up to lead position. I knew that, Imperial knew that, and I know Jack did too. Why did he hold him back?