Nothing Really Matters

Chapter Three ~ Helping Hands

"Paddy I was wondering if I could get race times of you from your top four horses?" I asked him before he headed into his house after the morning jobs.

"Sure. I have them in the house here. I'll bring them out to you now. Anything else you need?" He asked being very helpful and co-operative.

"No I think that's all for now, thanks." He headed into the house while I waited outside.

"Don't think you're getting away without cooking breakfast this morning!" Jack called out heading towards me from across the yard. "And I think along with my breakfast I'd like a kiss?" He teased. I burst out laughing. The hard man jockey is the cheesiest lad I've ever came across.

"You're a twat." I joked giving him a kiss on the cheek before Paddy came back out.

"Here you go Molly. Later on could you exercise Kelly Rock? He's the chesnut in the stable round the back. Just a trot out the road will do." To anyone else that wouldn't have been a big deal but I felt myself begin to sweat.

"Oh ehm.."

"That's no bother. She'll do it." Jack cut in. I was about to kill him. How could he say that? He knows what happened?

"Great. Thanks for that." Paddy turned and went back into the house.

"Jack?!" I practically screamed. "One small problem. I haven't been on a horse in two years!"

"Relax Mols. I've got this under control. I'll be with you I promise. Even if you just sit up on him and I'll do the rest with him after. You need this."

It was time for me to face up to something that's been holding me back for a while now, that is riding. Taking a deep breath I put on a spare skull cap helmet that was in the tack room. My hands were shaking as I fastened the clip under my chin. The weird thing is I know I want to ride again, deep down but my fear surfaces and I chicken out.

"Here, you can use my body protector. It's got fasteners on the sides." Jack hands me his protector while studying how I am. I slowly go to grab it but he stops me. "I got this." He states putting it on me.

"Thanks." I murmer still unsure whether or not this is a good idea.

We ventured out to Kelly Rock's stable where I tacked him early. He seemed like a genuine horse. Quiet to handle and didn't seem too phased by the bundle of nerves tacking him up. I stroked the blaze on the front of his face before bringing him out to the centre of the yard. Jack helped me put down my stirrups.

"It's okay Mols, you're doing great. I promise everything will be fine." Jack whispered into my ear trying not to be heard by the nosey stable hands eavesdropping. I gave him a small smile. "I'll give you a leg up." And within three little jumps I was up. I felt like such a beginner. My hands clung to the front of the saddle, my shoulders hunched up and I was gripping with my knees. Yet I could feel pride tingle inside of me. "You know you can breath now. This is a big step forward." Looking at a smiling Jack I take a breath I hadn't realised I'd been holding. Relaxing into my position I begin to feel my old self again.

Flashback~
"And it's Gallant King and Molly Conway who win the Murphy's Market Maiden Hurdle here in Ballinrobe!" The commentator announces as we pass the finishing line. I gleefully punch the air, my first victory under my belt! A dark bushy haired man in a shirt came up to me.

"Congrats Molly! Brilliant race. He's a great wee horse so he is. The hard work is finally paying off. I'm delighted for you. Now you're next race is in twenty minutes so you'd better get a move on." I dismounted my horse giving him a final pat and took of the saddle and headed back to the weighroom.

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"Molly? Are you okay?" I snapped out of my train of thought to look at a concerned Jack. Did I just have a flashback? It was real. I'm sure of it.

"I..I think I just remembered something." I said not really sure myself.

"As in from before the accident?" Jack asked, his head tilting to the side slightly.

"Yeah, my first win on a horse called Gallant Oscar." I racked my brain to think of more memories but I couldn't.

"Hmm..I think I might have heard of him before. His trainer is Gary Hasting." The man in the flashback?

"Dark bushy haired man?" I quieried becoming more and more comfortable on Kelly's Rock by the second.

"That's him. He's kind of a one hit wonder. Not too many good horses that kind of thing."

"Hey! Jack! Are you gonna stand about all day schmoozing your woman or are you gonna do some work?" My 'friend' from the first day yelled. His manners obviously haven't improved since.

"Well Vincy, even if I don't do damn all it'll still be more than what you do." Jack retorted quickly, anger building up inside of him.

"Hey." I said softly placing a hand on his shoulder. "I think I'll be fine here. The horse is as quiet as a lamb. You do what you have to do." He looked up at me, his anger seemed to fizzle away.

"I promised to stay with you." He places one of his hands on my knee and squeezes it gently.

"I know and I'm grateful but I'm fine now. Go." He smiles and heads off in Vincy's direction no doubt about to give him an earful.

"Let's go." I motioned Kelly's Rock forward and off we went down the road.

Returning to the house for lunch I was greeted by the smell of...burning? Immediately I flung open the door to see a bewildered Peter swatting away smoke from the little cooker with a tea towel.

"Stupid fire. Stupid paper. For God's sake!" He began shouting a string of profanities before chucking the tea towel on a nearby chair.

I opened the front and back windows in the small kitchen. Trying to let the smoke escape. "What in the Lord's name happened here?" I asked. Peter looked at me sheepishly.

"It was a recipe I saw in the Racing Post for jockeys. Everything was going smoothly until the newspaper caught on fire and I threw it into the pot. It's completely ruined." He collapsed on one of the chairs clearly deflated and defeated.

"Oh I'm sure it's not so bad." I leaned over to look into the pot. "Yeah nevermind." How could one do so much damage following a recipe? "How about I do lunch? How does pasta salad sound?" I raised an eyebrow at Peter.

"I owe you one Molly. Thanks." He smiled genuinely at me. I smiled back glad to be getting along well with him.

"What in the world happened here?!" Jack came bustling into the kitchen. He examined the smokey room, Peter's face and the burnt pot and scratched his head. "You know what? I actually don't want to know." He shook his head and came over to me. "How did it go?" He whispered into my ear snaking his hands around me as I began to clean the pot. A smile immediately crept onto my face.

"It was really good. Really really good. It was as if he was looking after me. Like someone else I know." I hinted at him. "I couldn't and wouldn't have done it without you." I said and it was true. I probably wouldn't have even thought about getting up on a horse again had it not been for Jack.

"We make a good team don't we?"