Worth the Wait (Robert Downey , Jr. Fanfic)

CHAPTER 36 : Doubts

Nathalie's POV :

I woke up the following morning with a warm arm enveloped on my waist. I turn to my right and saw Robert still sleeping. I admire his beautiful face, the strong jaws and amazingly chiselled nose. I touched his face gently, caressing his stubbles before I turned to my other side again and looked at my phone from my side table. I checked the time, it's already 9am. We must've slept that long because of the very tiring day yesterday. I decided to have my usual morning shower. I got up slowly but my head is still throbbing with pain.

I slowly got up from the bed only to be stopped by Robert.

"Honey, where are you going? Stay here and cuddle with me. It's too early." - Robert said

"I'm going to take my shower, Rob. I'll cuddle with you after. I just needed it badly. I want to relax. My head is aching like hell. I need to take my aspirin." - I stood up again trying to gain my balance but I guess I'm too weak to stand up and fell on the floor. Luckily, Robert was able to grab my arms right away.

"Honey? Are you okay? Come here." - Rob worriedly grab me from the edge of the bed towards his side. He made me lie down on his arms. He gently caressed by head with his soft hands.

It feels odd, I can feel it from his touch. I face him and looked him in his eyes.

"Rob, are you okay? Is there something wrong?" - I asked him while looking intently in his eyes.

"Nothing, honey." - he is trying to conceal it but I know him very well

"Come on! I know you too well" - I try to search for a legit answer from him. I know there is something wrong.

"Honey, the divorce papers were out. We are legally "done". I am free. " - he told me this but he doesn't look happy. Oh-uh... this is odd.

"Really? I am sorry it has to be like this. I hope you are happy with getting what you want. " - I am testing him, trying to search his feelings with the situation.

Silence.

It pains me. I don't know what goes through his mind. But I let him be and stay on his personal space. I did not bother to invade his privacy. After all, it is none of my damn business, it is not? I got up from the bed without saying a word. Roberts tried to stop me by holding me on my wrist but I just gently shove it. Then I went straight to the bathroom.

I looked at myself in the mirror. I look pale and sickly. I strip my clothes off and took my shower. I brushed my teeth and blow dried my hair. I went to the closet and put on my sweat pants and my casual polo shirt which Rob bought me when we went shopping for clothes and shoes before my birthday. He is still in the bed, taking a nap. I just walk passed him and I went straight to the living room. I decided to just watch a movie on HBO. Spiderman re-run. Good. I was laying on the couch when I heard the bedroom door open. Robert went out then sat on the couch. He placed my head on his lap. And he kissed my forehead while caressing my hair. I just continue to watch the movie.

"Honey, I'm sorry." - Why is he saying sorry? What's this all about?

I got the TV remote and turn it off. I think we need to talk about it. I want to know how he feels and what his plans are for the two of us. I am not going to pressure him but I need to hear what his thoughts are. After all, we are in a relationship and he has to be honest.

I just slowly got up and face him still without saying a word. I just look at him, then he begin...

"This past months that we have been together, since I met you I felt that everything is falling into its place. I am happy despite of what is happening with my family, between me and Susan. I even thought that you are sent to do divine intervention. I was at lost when my situation with Susan became worst. Then you came. You made everything perfect. But honey, with the divorce and this whole fiasco? I suddenly feel empty. I am very sure that I love you, I really do! But honey I have doubts. Doubts to myself! I am sorry. I am doubting myself if I can make you happy. If I am really over Susan. I think of my kids, and I think of you then I think of Susan again. I don't know. Please forgive me, honey but I am confused as to how I will face this. It's not that I am new to divorce but damn! It has been f**ckin' 13 years with her! " - I can feel that Robert will break into tears any moment.

It shattered me. He is confused. Maybe he just needs space or more time alone to deal with this and 13 years of being married with her, the one person who straightened his life and put into the winning direction. Unfortunately is the same person who broke his heart. I don't know, I am confused now. I love Robert but I don't know what happens next.

"Honey? Say something please? You are scaring me!" - Robert now hugs me very tight, planting small kisses on my head and in my face. I still don't say a word. My eyes suddenly began to water and tears fall from my eyes. I tried to hold back but I can't. I can feel sharp pain again in my chest but I just ignored it. Maybe we need to take our time out.

I pull away from Robert's embrace. I look at him with tears in my eyes. I said softly :

"Let's take a time out. I think we just need to figure out what we need to do. I am sorry Rob. Maybe, we being away from each other for a while will let us think of "us" moving forward. I just don't want us to be hurt both. I'll stay here and finish my 2 weeks' vacation. I'll let you know if I am ready to go back. You are also free to get my replacement as your assistant. I know that you really need one and I can't be the cause of your job's delay. Sorry Rob if you are feeling this right now. I wish I could do something about it but unfortunately, you are the only one who can fix it." - tears continue to stream down my face.

"Are you breaking up with me? " -Robert now has tears in his eyes as well.

I honestly don't know the answer. I don't want to answer.

I just stood up and walk away towards the bedroom.

XO