HARRY POV: An unfortunately situation
Dry, cracked lips pressed against my cheek in a desperate triumph of opening my eyes, but the pursuer failed.
My eyes stayed shut; the green hating the idea of the light seeking them. I didn’t want to find the light as such – I wasn’t dying, no; not physically – but the overwhelming sense of the pain bombarding my system and body was unbearably sore.
I knew what was wrong; I didn’t really have to over-think the situation. Nor did I want or need to over-think the outcome, since I didn’t have one and right in this moment, I didn’t need to have one. I was just going to lie here, and hope that everything bad will go away. But, like many people say, you have to face the bad if you want to face the good.
I never knew love could feel this way. Actually, at first, I wasn’t even sure it existed. But now I’m positive. Because what else could these feelings be? Hate, no. Anger, definitely not. Admiration…yes…I suppose, but that comes under love, doesn’t it? Well, I’m not sure. Then again, I’m not real sure of anything anymore. Except one thing, of cause. I was sure I was in love.
The pursuer – Louis – had their arm slung low around my hips, resting heavily on my lower abdomen, feeling closer to my manhood than it actually appeared. His other arm was wound around my neck, cool fingertips massaging the relaxing skin below my hairline. I smiled, eyes still closed, and I sighed into the feathery-light kiss that Louis gave me. Louis hummed in pleasure as I pressed back with a little more force.
From that point, the kiss escalated into something more passionate and urgent, but never did it go from loving to unloving. It was always loving – they always were. No matter how hard, or forceful or painful Louis and I kissed, they were never not going to be full of pure adulation or love.
That had to be one of my favourite things about us being in a relationship. We didn’t have to change much. Yes, we changed in the way that we express our romantic love for each other (far differently than before might I add, I much prefer showing it then hiding it) but no, we never had to change the way we were best friends. Louis will always be my best mate, and that won’t change now and I hope it never will. As long as I’m dating him, I know we’ll be together friendship-wise eternally.
I sat up, holding onto Louis’ waist so he wouldn’t tip backwards roughly. I kept pushing forceful kisses onto his lips, enjoying the moment, keeping them elongated so I could savour the deliciously beautiful taste that I was scared of never tasting again.
What Simon had said to us scared me. I’m sorry, but I can’t let you to be together publically. At least, not yet. Those are words no one wants to hear, especially if you’re in a relationship with the person you want to be with for the rest of your life.
It’s also something I wouldn’t wish on anyone else. I can’t see myself hating someone so much that you’d wish the punishment of not being able to love who you want, when you want – and how you want. I find that utterly heart-breaking, and disastrous to think about. I couldn’t imagine it. But if everything goes wrong, I will be living it and I won’t have to try and imagine what it’d be like.
Pulling away, I pressed a kiss to the yellowish love-bite on Lou’s neck, and I heard a faint, muffled groan slips between his dry lips. Despite their dryness, they still held the same glorious feel. If anything, they added more feeling and emotion to the rawness of where the skin had been gnawed away at by his own teeth. It was depressing to think he’d chewed his lips away whilst he was deep in thought – most likely about our meeting with Simon – and I wasn’t there to stop him.
I hadn’t managed to sleep well last night, but when I had, I slept soundly and without nightmares. Perhaps that’s where I went wrong. That was possibly the moment where Louis hadn’t fallen asleep, and he began thinking about what we would do, what would happen, and/or how we’re going to hide this if we do continue it. The thing that made me fear, and made me tremble was a simple question that I don’t think I could ever answer without guidance:
How am I going to love him?
It was a simple, short – particularly basic – question, yet it held answers which are beyond this world, beyond lovable proportions. They were beyond human life – any life! I hated the unfortunate situation we were in, and it killed me to think that when we leave the building today, we’re going to have to be even more careful. Frankly, one look at each other may cause Simon to freak and question our status.
Saying I was scared was a underestimate. There was no going back from here. Only forward. There is no point at looking at what we could have been doing – it’s only what we must be doing.
Whether we use our strength to do that is the real thing to ponder about.
I pressed my lips back to Louis’ harshly, tugging him down onto my chest, ripping his shirt overhead. Hastily, he followed suit, and eventually his hands found the front of my boxers, as did mine.
LOUIS POV: the unfortunate situation
I wretched my lips away from Harry’s as I cried his name into the air.
Earlier it had just been our pants, sometimes silent groans and loud everlasting moans mixing together in the once quiet and harmonious, but now it was cries and yells of names and breaths soaring higher and higher until our chests nearly gave out.
Miraculously, we both settled safely down from our highs, and lapsed back into the solid silence, only now bothered by heavy breathing and the smell of sweat.
A moment passed without any of us talking, but then Harry breathed in, and released it slowly. “I love you Lou,” he said, dazed, before adding “I’m going to fix our problem, okay? I promise.”
Somehow, my giddiness of what we had just done hadn’t altered. Maybe it was because my love for Harry was too strong, or because I may have imagined the words inside my head and my emotions hadn’t actually reacted because they weren’t there. Either way, I wasn’t alarmed or emotionally changed.
But the things that went through my head after a second’s silence was loud and ear-piercing. I’m sorry, but I can’t let you to be together publically. At least, not yet. Then, suddenly, something inside my head clicked at those words. Not yet.
I looked at Harry, immediately excited and exuberant. “Not yet Harry, not yet!”
“…What am I missing here? Did I make a move on you again, because I swear, I had no intention on having se–”
I slapped him around the back of the head – playfully – and silenced him with an elongated kiss which I soaked into. “Simon had said ‘at least, not yet’. Not yet…that doesn’t mean we can’t! Or, we can take his words differently and think he meant ‘just not publically’?” Realisation crossed Harry’s green eyes, and I smiled upon seeing his own pearly whites, and he threw his arms around me, hugging me till I fell forwards onto him.
The silence didn’t come back, because I began yelling “I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU” repetitively.
