Harry POV: Moments like this
“Harry…can I talk to you for a minute?”
I turned my head towards the sound of the quiet, overly polite – yet familiar – voice. I smiled at Jay, and gestured for her to enter my bedroom. She sat on the edge of the freshly made bed, which I presumed, my mother had made not long before. “What’s going on?” I asked casually, adjusting my hair in the mirror by the nightstand.
She coughed, tapping her leg nervously. My eyes narrowed as I watched her in the reflection. I turned, eyeing her cautiously. “Is everything alright Jay?”
Her gaze met mine, and she weakly smiled, but then nodded without any hesitation. “Yes, Dear, everything’s perfect…it’s just…”
I stopped what I was doing, and went and sat beside her on the bed. “Jay…talk to me. What’s wrong?” She flicked her eyes towards mine, and they seemed to be suddenly reassured with something – confidence maybe?
Whatever it was, she began to answer me. “I know what happened between you and Louis.”
I lost control of my eyes, and they widened into green sorcerers with eyebrows at the hairline. “Uhh…” I began, but she stopped me with her hand.
“I don’t care…honestly, I was expecting it. Which I’m sure you were seeing coming too. I always knew there was something between you two, but that’s not what the problem is…there are a few issues, ones that I’m sure are resolvable, but others that I’m pretty sure aren’t…”
I nodded at her, cheeks red and embarrassed. “And what are the ones that can be resolved?”
She smiled at me, emotionless but comforting. “Well, the boys don’t know – but I’m sure they can be told within the next twenty-four hours, yes?” I nodded, cheeks burning a deeper crimson then before. “Secondly, your mother doesn’t know – she can be informed also? I don’t think it’s fair on her if I have to tell her.”
I nodded again, but this time I added: “no, I’ll tell her. She’d…want that of me.”
She smiled at me, “Harry, you have to remember…Louis is my son. And no matter what he does, I’m going to love him always. And it’s hard to see him with someone that he loves because I’m scared they’re going to take him away from me. I understand he loves me, not romantically, so it’s different, but ever since my divorce…I’m scared he feels that love is…not real, or not achievable anymore. But when he’s with you Harry, I see everything I wanted him to be: happy, carefree, joyous…but when the hate – which there will be plenty of, by the way – starts…I’m not really sure how he’ll cope.”
I lowered my head, glancing down at the floor. I knew what she was saying, I understood it very clearly. She wanted it a secret. I didn’t know how long for, but that wasn’t what bothered me. How was I going to handle not being romantic towards him in public? It was a challenge, I knew that already.
“How long for?” I asked her ominously.
She sniffed, biting her lip, thinking hard. After a moment of silence, she spoke hesitantly. “For however long…I’m sorry Harry, I can’t see him hurt like that! It’s just I know it will hurt–”
I interjected her. “Me as well, yeah. I know.” She cocked her head to the side, sympathy shown through stress lines on her forehead and around her lips. “What are the things that can’t be resolved?”
Her pleasant expression fell into a pit of morose. “Ahh…”
“What?” I asked, voice suddenly lingering with strong concern for something I wasn’t going to like – I knew I’d hate what was about to escape her lips.
“Management…” I groaned, falling onto the mattress, staring up to the ceiling with red-fury. She sighed beside me, and patted my knee with her comforting, motherly hand. “Harry, I understand what this means, and I’m sure you do as well. But you’re a strong boy, always have been. And no matter what people say, or what people do, I know you’ll find a way to make everything okay. There’s a saying, Harry – I heard it in a movie when I was really young, and I’ve loved it ever since. ‘If it is not yet perfect, then it is not yet the end.’ So Harry…if your life isn’t the way you want it to be, it isn’t peaceful, it isn’t right – it is not yet over, the end is not yet near. Only you and Louis can make it through – please don’t ever give up!”
Louis POV: moments like this
If I had to be totally honest with myself, I would say I was scared utterly shitless.
I had never been so petrified – mainly because I had never taken a whole lot of risks – but because I was frightened of what they were going to think. ‘They’ as in the pride, ‘they’ as in the army, ‘they’ as in the lovers, and ‘they’ as in whatever they call themselves. ‘They’ as in the fans. I wasn’t worried to tell the boys as much as I was scared to tell the fans – but I was still determined to do it, whatever I get from it and/or what the consequences are.
I trotted down the stairs, and into the kitchen, opening the fridge. My arms were bare, and the cool temperature from the inside made me shiver. I grabbed the milk, and opened the carton, took a slug, before shutting the door again. My TOMS made no sound on the tiles as I made my way to the breakfast bar stools. I plonked into one, letting out a sigh of exhaustion.
I had been thinking too much recently, instead of just ‘doing’. I was hoping to change that, but I knew it wouldn’t really last all that long because we were telling the boys today. This…this was going to be difficult, because they were like my brothers – and now I’m ‘dating’ one of them! It’s bound to be awkward, but Harry was the love of my life (I was sure of it) and I didn’t want to hide it from them any longer.
I lifted my head when I heard fast footsteps down the stairs, and I smiled when Harry entered. He grinned back, coming over and pecking my forehead. “Hey Lou!” He greeted cheerily, grabbing the milk from the fridge and pouring himself a glass. Harry has better manners than I do.
“Hey Haz,” I said back, flashing my teeth. “Are we telling the boys today?”
He paused, taking the cup away from his lips, and I clearly saw the proud, kid-like smile on his lips. “Yes.”
I chuckled. “I’m scared to tell the fans…don’t even get me started on management.” Harry bit the edge of the cup, and his smile faded.
“Louis…about that.”
I groaned, letting my head fall into my hands. I knew there would be something. “…What?”
He sniffed, placing the empty cup on the bench. “I was talking to your mum…and she thinks it would be best to not tell management for the time being. I mean, we can tell the boys, just not anyone like that – yet. We will, I promise! Just not now…”
I looked at him expressionlessly, although my eyes still felt wary. I guessed what he meant made perfect sense, but that didn’t mean I liked it. Yes, if we didn’t tall management we would get to be together, but secretly. But if we did tell them, we wouldn’t be allowed to be together at all. But…for some reason, I wanted the world to know that Harry was taken and that I was his. But I knew things that were difficult couldn’t always end up the way you wanted them to…sometimes things end ways you don’t want.
“Its fine Haz…what time do we meet the boys?”
