Strings (Ryan Gosling × Reader)

Chapter 3 - Routine

I park close to my apartment building, and once I get out the car, I drag myself up to the entrance. In a tired and careless manner, I pull out my house keys from my bag, and I open the heavy glass door, pushing it with my entire body weight since my arms can't muster up the strength at this hour.

My feet are heavy as they land on each step of the staircase. I pull myself up by the handrail, and when I finally reach my apartment, I once again I use my jingling keys to open the wooden door. Once I'm inside, a sense of ease washes over me. Home.

I drop my bag on the dining table that I mostly use to work, hang my jacket next to the door, and walk towards my room.

I've started living in a routine I made subconsciously. I guess tricking your brain into thinking you're organized really makes it do stuff for you.

I pick out pijamas for me to wear later, setting them on my bed, and I have everything: shirt, sweatpants, socks, underwear and a hoodie for the possibility of being cold. I have to have it all set so I don't have any setbacks.

I grab my towel and walk to my bathroom and reach to the collar of my white button down, undoing all the buttons until it was open. I take it off, then unzip the side of my skirt, pushing it down and letting it fall on the floor. I step out of it and pick it up, setting it over the shirt. I strip myself down to my bare skin, and run a warm shower.

Once I got under the water, I felt it run the marathon down my body as I just marinated in the warmth. I washed my hair, my body, shaved my legs and my armpits, and when I was entirely cleansed from the dirt and grimes of the day, I turned off the water and stepped out, drying off my hair before wrapping the towel around me.

When I finish drying my hair with a blowdrier, I put on the clothes I sorted out earlier and head to the kitchen, getting a plate of leftovers from yesterday, heating it up, fetching a drink from the fridge and then bringing it all to the dining table in front of my computer. I set all the paperwork in the radius of the table I will be using. When I sit down, I get to work and eat my dinner at the same time.

Even though I'm working, I can relax now, I'm eating my good food, sitting at my comfy chair at my table in my home. And, of course, with the invasive company of my cat, who tries to eat my food, walk over my keyboard, or just sit on my paperwork. I get him to calm down eventually.

I hear the polite ring of a facetime call from my computer. It reads "From Sally". She's the kind of person that I can just stay in facetime for hours without saying a word, as if we're roomates.

I answer the call.

"Y/N! How are you doing??" She smiled through the screen.

"Oh, you know.. same old, same old.. I got paperwork, busy day, just like everyday." I sigh, showing her the papers on my table.

"You have to introduce me to him one day, you know." She gave me a sly smile.

"Sally, you know I can't. Not just like that."

"Why not? He's in your life, you're friends, you can bring him around, you know?"

"That's.. not how it works." I chuckle "Yes, he's in my life in general, but not.. he's not in my life, you know? I mean... I don't even know if we are friends. I just work for him. It would be unprofessional if I just started spilling my life onto his."

"Okay, okay. I get it. But, Y/N, you don't have days off, you are working your ass off more than I've ever seen you do."

"This is a once in a lifetime opportunity, I took it, I have it, I gotta do it right."

"He offered you a day off! Why didn't you take it?"

"I can't get side-tracked, Sal, I need to be perfect, I have to give it my best, I can't risk losing this job. This is all I ever wanted."

"That's not true. All you ever wanted was to be a filmmaker, an actress, you wanted to be someone."

"Yeah, I know. But we have to live in reality, Sally. This is what I get and it already is a lot more than what you usually get. I should be grateful to have gotten here."

"Okay, maybe. But Y/N... A day off doesn't make you a bad employee. Working everyday is gonna cause you to overwork and.. you will break down at some point."

"No, I can handle it. I'm almost three months in, and I'm fine."

"If you say so." Sally shrugged and walked around in her kitchen, making her late might ramen "But you better get sleep."

"I get eight hours of sleep everyday." I answer, my eyes scanning documents.

"You sound like a robot." She chuckled "What would happen if you slept for seven hours instead of eight? Your battery wouldn't last all day?"

"Maybe. I don't know. I don't wanna find out the bad way." I sigh "This job.. means a lot to me."

"I know, honey." Sally nods "And you're great at it."

"Thanks..." I smile softly.

"Since you don't have days off, maybe one day I'll pay you a visit."

"As long as you don't try to sabotage anything, then it's fine." I jokingly say.

"Your precious routine is safe from me, darling, trust me. I just miss you."

"Yeah, I miss you too."

-

At 8pm, I wash the dishes I used and I brush my teeth. Once I get in bed, like half an hour later, I stare at the ceiling.

This job means everything to me. This is my life. Even if I have to give up some dreams and all my free hours. To be able to work in this space is more than I could ask for. And even better.. to be able to work for The Ryan Gosling, the actor I always had such a crush on. To ruin anything about this would be devastating.

Around 9pm, I fall asleep, sinking into my subconscious.

I haven't dreamt in a long time.