25. Care and Cure

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After listening to her guilt washed over me

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After listening to her guilt washed over me. I felt like someone dumped a bucket of cold water on me. I am blameworthy and culpable. Anger blinded me to notice her pain.

When she said ‘ you're no different from my family ‘ they may be the mere words of frustration but they held the depth of her past. Now that comparison is heavy on my heart after knowing what she went through.

I wish to rewind the past and slaughter the reasons for her misery. I feel like carnaging her family members for treating her this way and giving her a traumatic past.

But you're not less than them Arjun. Even though you didn't try to comprehend her pain, instead you questioned her.  It's you who triggered her to pass out. My mind mocked me.

“ Manvika, I am regretting every word I spoke. I can't change it but I am repetencing it. Never I would be pointing you out. Please forgive me.” She deserves everything after what she has been through. I should be the one apologizing her not just sorry but correcting my blunder.

“ you don't have to feel contrite about it. Anyone in your place would react the same way as you. I know your intentions behind your anger.” She is quite mature to think that way.

“ Are you mad at me?” I couldn't stop myself from asking. She can fight with me, can do anything but cannot leave me.

“ Why would I be? You are unaware of the reasons. I was full of myself to ignore your feelings that moment. I should be the one who is apologizing.” She is not at fault but she is sorry. Shaking my head I kissed her forehead and made her lay comfortably, covered with a duvet.

“Manvika, promise me one thing, never hesitate to use my money , no our money. It is your right as my wife. Whatever belongs to me is rightfully yours. Act like you own me.” I want to assure her and she has to claim her rights.

“ I can't do that. Maybe in the future I may. I need some time to adjust to new changes.” She said by loosening the hold on my hand.

Soon she dozed into sleep, her breath became even. I adjusted myself beside her and cuddled her. The moment she passed out I was scared to hell. I have never seen her in a vulnerable state. Her palms were sweating badly and her body was cold. Her lovely face turned pale and expressionless.

I was scared of losing her. Never in my life I am going to question her because she might be having her reasons. I can't even imagine what a 15 year teenage Manvika might have gone through.

I have been rightfully claiming my rights on Papa's money using them like water. Never papa or maa restricted me. But what she might be feeling makes me restless.

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