Here We Go Again

Part 37

"Is it bad?" Carina asked as Maya grabbed her wife's hand desperately, feeling her anxiety soaring.

"I am not going to say it is bad," Amelia said, "Because that isn't true. Let me show you."

Amelia pulled out her tablet, quickly getting into Lia's chart and showing Maya and Carina the images, "So, you see this area here? This is where she had the bleed and it has mostly cleared now which is great. However, there are some small changes to the brain around that area."

"What does that mean?" Maya asked, feeling nauseous as she listened to their friend talk about their daughter's brain.

"It could mean nothing," Amelia said, "But it does put her at an increased risk for cerebral palsy or cognitive delays. None of the changes are severe, but we won't know what they mean for Lia for a while, months or potentially even years. We are going to be watching her development very closely for the next couple of years to see and get her into interventions as needed. I will get you set up with a great pediatric neurologist before you leave and make sure you guys have all the support you need, ok?"

"What is the likelihood of her having something seriously wrong?" Maya asked, trying really hard not to let the tears she was fighting fall.

"I don't know," Amelia said honestly, "I can tell you that it is not a large area of abnormality which is good. And from what I have seen with all the time I have spent with her, she is developing pretty well."

"Have you noticed anything?" Carina asked, voice shaking, "When you spend time with her, do you see any signs of things being wrong?"

"She does have some hypertonia I've noticed," Amelia said, hating to tell her friends this but knowing they needed to know, "It's not overly severe, but it is there for sure. You have probably seen it too, you just don't realize. You know how her arms are a little bit stiff and so are her legs? That's what I'm talking about. It's mild though. And she is eating well and tracking with her eyes as well as any baby her age and starting to make sounds. Those are all good signs. It's next to impossible to diagnose anything when they are this small if the issue is not severe. And as soon as they see issues, interventions will start. You know she gets PT and OT here and they will likely send you home with those services which will help catch anything going on early too."

The three of them were silent for a moment, Maya and Carina just staring at Lia as Amelia gave them the space they needed.

"Do you have any questions for me?" Amelia asked after a minute.

"I...not right now," Carina said, Maya shaking her head, "Thank you."

"I'm so sorry to be the one to have to tell you guys all of this," Amelia said, "If you have any questions, please let me know ok?"

"Thank you," Maya mumbled as Amelia squeezed both of their shoulders before leaving the NICU.

They sat there for a few minutes, just staring at their daughter, feeling like their entire world had just been flipped on its head.

"I...I am going to go to the bathroom," Maya said, abruptly standing up and bolting from the NICU, leaving Carina alone holding a sleeping Lia.

The Italian knew that her wife wasn't going to the bathroom, deciding to go make sure she was ok. She carefully settled Lia in her crib, making sure the baby had her pacifier, rubbing her back to fully lull her back to sleep before heading to find Maya.

She had no idea where her wife went, but she decided to try the bathroom first since that was where Maya said she went. She walked over to the family bathrooms, knocking on the door of the locked one, hearing a croaking "Occupied" that she knew belonged to her wife.