ꁞℒℴ𝓈𝓉 𝒷ℴ𝓎ꁞ⁠

I

|| my first i love you was something more than i made it out to be||

°°°°°

A promise, this is something people don't believe something i definitely should but when he pulled out that finger i just couldn't help but curl it with trust, and i can fearfully say i trust him, even when i shouldn't have.

I always saw him over there but he wasn't there tonight and that was impossible to me when many people would call that abnormal, i was scared..... terrified.

That Soo much i told her, i told her and she looked at me frightened too probably like she knew i was telling the truth, nope i later understand the meaning of that look, she was scared for me.

And the second i blinked the night before i lost him, a stranger in my mind.

But not in my heart.

my stomach was in a twist everynight because of something, someone who shouldn't have existed,
She always blamed it on letting me watch Peter pan but i blamed it then and now on the truth,

You.

°°°°°

age<14>

Another summer, another reason to close my window shut.

This might be a weird reason but leaving my window open is never the answer.

I refuse to because of the strange dreams but tonight will be different from last night because hopefully my mum has gotten my ac fixed.

My mum hates me, she loathes me and that's why she forgets me, and truthfully i can't stand it when she forgets me because it hurts,

I mean she's always been forgetful,at least when it came to me, is it weird to be tired of it ?

I can't say i blame her, i just don't want to feel that way.

i'm not that much of a sad person i just mostly feel numb, i feel nothing.

My life is normal soo i shouldn't complain right ? i have an house but it isn't an home, i'm apart of a family almost barely because she never even tried, i burnt down a house in return i have a family i wish would just burn, too bad it wouldn't.

my father isn't alive soo why do i have to call a random stranger father ?

I still remember when I first met him i regret that day i regretted ever knowing my mum, she disappointed me and it hurt me, alot.

i always had a strange dream, it felt real i'd be up talking to him all night but for once never felt tired at night, i remembered one day when i was little i went out with my mum and arrived home really late, the saddest part was i wouldn't get to talk to him that day, as the foolish fire my mum calls me i went straight to my room to talk to him the lost boy who always wondered to me.

He's the only friend i actually still care for, i miss him.

i never deared to call him lost boy to his face he'd probably yank my ponytailed red hair with a little side smile and always use it to laugh at me, he thought me many things i didn't know.

Like he never is predictable, especially surprising me with his old trick when i called him lost boy

i didn't know a lot and i probably still don't but remembering him makes me feel less numb, i'm probably just one silly lost girl like he'd call me whenever my mind wondered too far,

°°°

"Rose" he speaks and i hope into the bed next to his side on my bed my window widely open letting the cool cold wind in,

"You never ever close my window now do you ?" i wonder out then i remember why i'm crying,

"dumb girls do that" i spoke with tears in my eyes, and then he'd reply with

"saying that makes you look dumb" he spoke rolling his eyes giving me Soo much peace but i just couldn't help but feel more dumb,

"my mum said so, b-but it's my fault i shouldn't have asked her such a question" i spoke my voice sounding more sickly than nice,

"What did you ask, because only someone dumb would call you that, you're too smart to believe that coming from someone who acts the way she does" he spoke with a serious face,

"really ?" i spoke, and he replied with a nod making me feel better,

"i asked her, how did he die" i speak and lost boy guesses the person was my father since i already told him,

"She's dumb, you aren't never believe the words she throughs at you, you're worth more than that" he speaks "promise ellie-rose ?" He asks me making my smile widing and i grin,

"i promise lost-" and i immediately cut myself off, and he smiles at me softly making me smile in relief, 5 seconds later i cover my face groaning hiding my smile more-like large grin trying to not look down as he drops me off the balcony,

"this joke is getting old lost boy" i scream giggling as he grabs me quickly before i fall far enough to be seen,

"i love you" i speak staring straight at him my red face smiling like an emoji,

"Really ?" he asks with his raised eyebrow, and i nod my red face,

"You're my only family, who i actually like"

"Then i love you too Wendy, you're lucky i got lost that day" and i smile nodding at my lost friend,

I love him.

°°°

I wasn't not meant to be awake that night yet i was, i never feel bad when he's here, even when i have a cold.

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Chapter 1 of lost boy out, i hope you liked it,

⑅ her nicknames are cute aren't they ?⑅