A Queens Sorrow

Chapter 32: Causeless Tears

Heather sat in the dining room.
Lights off. Her head spinning. Thoughts of past loves and the way they chastised her. The way their partners belittled her. The way nobody loved her. The way nobody really truly cares about her. It destroys her internally. Flusters her emotionally, crushes her physically.... She slammed her fist on the glass table that sat infront of her. Ruffling the white frilled embroidered tapestry that covered the entirety of the table. Her emotions partially being vented onto the wooden veneer that had shook so violently a few seconds before. The loud crash echoing throughout the practically empty but dark room.

She hated feeling like this. Lonely, alone, broken. All the happiness that was on display for the rest of the country, didn't even compare to the sadness that was on weighing on her soul and etched into her heart. They'd seem her on their television screens, on their phones, giving the most influential talks about recent political matters, her sister being found, (the one thing that actually was a happier surprise in her otherwise doomed life), at the moment she only felt -

Broken and shattered, she stood to her feet. Tears falling from her eyes, ironically for once not because of her missing her beloved mom and once infamously generous Queen, but because she missed him. Missed what they were together. The memories...they haunt her. The reality is like a continuous punch to her well tuned gut. The cruelty of the world wasn't able to be shielded anymore, Heather collapsed to the ground. The world around her spinning around and shaking as she began sobbing, screaming aggressively and slamming her fist onto the ground, asking her god why.

Why is it her that has to feel this way.
Why is it her that has to be alone.
Why is it her that has to feel broken.
Why is it her that has to feel lonely.
Why does she have to feel so infinitely discombobulated.
So eternally ugly...

Heather would lay there. Sobbing for the next two hours, until she would take to her former parents room and to cry once more, this time with her voice now horse, she'd sob weakly into her makeup smeared pillow, until she finally fell asleep..with the hope that she'd wake up tomorrow and the next day would feel and be better. A question filled great doubt before moving back into her comfort space.