Affinity (RDJ) - 1st person

Chapter 16 - Tomorrow

That night, I toss and turn as I always do. Except it's not the same. My mind is racing with thoughts about him. I find myself drifting off into a dream about him, about his lips on mine and his hand in my hair.

I wake up with a gasp, my heart pounding.

Expecting to see something sinister from my nightmares again, I flick my bedside light on quickly and peer around my room. Nothing. I sigh in relief and lie back onto my pillows, basking in the warm glow of the lamp.

This is the first time I've felt sure about something in 6 months. I think I know how he feels for me. And I'm definitely sure about how I feel for him.

It physically aches to know I've got a full weekend to bear before I see him again. A full weekend of the same old mundane routine. I don't want to sound selfish or ungrateful for any time that I have; it's just that time with him feels like I finally have a reason in life for the first time since everything happened. A purpose. I take a deep breath - I can do this.

I spend the morning studying, not able to resist googling Robert's name. I'm in disbelief at how well known he is on the surgical forums and get so engrossed in the hundreds of glowing news reports written about him from when he won his Harper Avery. He's a 'surgical god' as Lexi would say, and I can't believe he has an interest in me.

I'm snapped out of my thoughts by the sound of my phone vibrating on the table. It's a message from George, and after reading it, my eyes are drawn to the time. 2:03 pm. Jumping up, not having realized how late it is, I slip on my shoes and run out to the bus stop. I'm usually at the hospital by now on a Saturday.

I spend the rest of the afternoon there with dad, and it's nice when Dr. Shepherd drops by to update me on mom's condition, although not a lot has really changed. I'm just glad to have something to take my mind off things for a while, to pass the time.

After a couple of hours, I head back home, and the second I step into the house, I go straight to my room and collapse onto my bed.

Sunday is a long day and I don't even bother getting properly dressed. My old Guns n Roses t-shirt drapes over me, with a pair of grey jersey shorts and white sports socks completing the look. The hours crawl by and I feel like I'm going insane. Why is it that time always goes slower when you're waiting for something?

At around 5 pm, I hear a knock at the door. 'Hey, Rem can you get that please? I'm just getting dressed!' Rex yells from his bedroom. Rolling my eyes, I slouch off the sofa and to the front door. I pull it open to reveal Robert on the other side, hands shoved into the pockets of his jeans, shoulders back. I feel my heart flutter at the sight of him, and I try not to think about the complete mess I look when he's standing there looking like that.

He looks straight at me, clearly surprised to see me answering the door. Noticing that signature grin spreading across his face, I can't help but mirror his expression. 'Hey, you,' he says through his grin. Any worry I had about my appearance fades away under his gaze.

'Hey... what are you...' I'm trying to get words out but my heart is thumping ten to the dozen at the sight of him.

'Rex and I are going for a drink tonight at Joe's,' he explains, eyes still locked on mine.

'I'm surprised they're having you back after your little performance on Friday,' I tease, biting my lip to try and suppress my smile.

His eyes glint with amusement. 'I promised him an influx of custom from my students in return for the overlooking of my drunkenness. He's a good guy.'

He pauses, considering. 'Hey, I'm sorry about my... demeanor. On Friday. It wasn't my best look, I imagine...' he trails off, grin faltering slightly.

'Turned out pretty well in the end... for me anyways,' I say quietly, looking shyly up at him through my eyelashes. For the first time, I see him blush and that dimple appears on his cheek as he half-grins.

'Yeah... it did didn't it?' I feel heat pool in my stomach at the thought of Friday night, and I can't help but notice the effect it's having on him as well.

I'm so attracted to him. I just want him to pull me in and to feel his lips on mine again...

'Hey, sorry man I was just getting ready!' my brother announces, bursting out of his room and shattering the tension that had been building in the doorway. 'You could've asked the man inside, Remy, jeez,' he jokes, pulling on his coat as he approaches the front door.

'Yeah, sorry...' I mutter, feeling my face redden.

Robert shakes his head. 'Don't worry about it. You ready pretty boy?' he quips, patting Rex on the shoulder and making me smirk to myself.

'Let's go, old man,' Rex jokes back.

Robert holds his hand to his heart despairingly. 'I'm wounded. Truly.'

I chuckle at them as Rex leads the way to the main exit. 'See ya later, sis!' he calls back. Robert rotates away to follow him, turning back only to grin in my direction, mouthing 'tomorrow,' as he walks away.

I feel a flutter in my stomach at the thought of it and can only manage one shaky nod back to him before he's gone.

Tomorrow.