The Beloved

Insomnia

Arohi jumped out of her bed sweating profusely. She was breathing heavily. She wiped the sweat off her forehead. Phewww.... It was just a nightmare. Yet again! She grabbed her phone from the side table. It was 2am. She sighed heavily. Yet another sleepless night. She plopped her head back to the pillow, looking up at the ceiling. She could not go back to sleep now. She had been suffering from insomnia for a while now. The pills that she was taking wasn't working anymore. She made a quick mental note to make an appointment with her Doctor/Friend Aisha. She definitely needed something more but Arohi did not like the idea of being dependent on pills. There has to be a better way. She tried to close her eyes only to be awakened by the sound of an ambulance, bringing back memories of rushing her mother to the hospital.

She looked at the phone again and it was 4 now. She decided to get off the bed. She freshen up and changed into her tracks to get her cardio work out on the treadmill. That, somehow, seemed to help with her panic attacks. Of late, the attacks had been happening more often, possibly because her mother's birthday was coming up in a few weeks. It had been 8 years since the incident but it was still fresh in her memory as if it was yesterday. She increased the speed on her treadmill. She wanted to feel the physical aches and pains, may be, that will help reduce the pain she felt within. Finally, when she could hardly breathe anymore, she started to slow down.

She wiped her face with her towel and sat on the chair until her breathing was back to normal. She then stood up and grabbed her phone. She went to her messages and typed "Ais" and messaged her, "Good morning Aishu. Need to see you today. I need help. TTYL." She placed the phone back on to the end table and went for a nice cold shower. She stepped out in her towel and ran her schedule for the day, in her mind. She had a meeting with a banker at 10 but other than that she really did not have to see anyone until a team meeting at 2pm. She browsed through her closet. She decided to go with the green and black suit. She looked at her face in the mirror and rolled her eyes. There were evident dark circles around her eyes. She looked for the concealer. That would do the trick, she hoped. Once she was satisfied with the way she looked, she went to her kitchen and grabbed a large mug of black coffee, no sugar, no milk. She then dropped a slice of toast on a plate and spread some peanut butter. She took a quick bite without even relishing it.

She then went up to her shoe closet and selected the black high heels. Arohi's chauffer was waiting for her. He opened the back door of the car for her to step in, which she did, without looking at his face or acknowledging his, "Good morning Ma'am". Just went they started driving, she got a message from Aisha, "I have a 11am if you want to and we can grab lunch?" Arohi looked at her calendar again. Her meeting with the banker would be a quick one. She would still be able to make it on time. Well, she had no choice. She quickly responded, "Works for me." Then she put her phone away.

She was in her office by 7am. She was the only one walking on those tiles and the sound of her heels echoed as she walked into her office. She was engrossed in work and lost track of time but it was past 10 and the banker had not showed up. Arohi was always very punctual and she hated it when people did not respect her time. She would give 5 minutes grace time but not more than that. She felt that was grace enough for someone who needed her help. At 10:15 she buzzed her secretary Joe, "Joe please cancel the appointment with Mr. Gupta. If he isn't here yet then he doesn't need out help. We cannot help him with his mortgage issues. Also I will be away from the office for a couple of hours. Please take messages for me."

Arohi walked straight to Aisha's posh office. Aisha quickly shut the door behind Arohi and the women hugged, "Hi Arohi it is so good to see you. How are you? I was a little concerned when I saw your message. It wasn't about the content of your message but the time at which you sent it. Are you still having trouble sleeping?" Arohi sighed, "Aisha please give me something stronger. I barely get a couple of hours and then I wake up sweating and panting. The nightmares are back. Please help me Aish." Aisha smiled sadly, "Arohi I have given you the strongest sleeping pill. I cannot, as a medical practitioner, give you anything more than this. Like I have mentioned to you before, you need to consider therapy. Yup cannot go on like this dear." Arohi started nodding her head, "No Aish. I am not seeing some weird shrink. You know how are feel about them." Aisha held Arohi's hand and said, "Come on Arohi, give it a try. Therapy has really helped a lot of people, including me and you know that. See, why don't you just try one session and if you still feel the same way, you don't have to do it again and we will think of something else. Trust me darling, please. I can set up your appointment with Dr. Sudhanshu. You will like him because he is as grumpy as you so you guys will gel well." She chuckled.

Arohi glared at her but she knew she needed help so she, reluctantly agreed.

Brinda Subramanian