END GAME | Lewis Hamilton

Chapter 30: Cornelia Street

I was madly stressing out and called Iris on the way to the airport who was able to calm me down. She told me to when I was ready lip sync to Lacy another Olivia Rodrigo song, her and I had a good giggle about that.

I'm not going to lie, coming out to the whole world was not on my 2023 bucket list. But I felted relieved in a way, the feeling of a weight being lifted off of me. I really didn't know what this secret was doing to me until it wasn't one.

I would also be lying if I said I wasn't still freaking out about this and I think that's how I made my decision to own it.

Once Lewis and I had taken off I toke a deep breathe and started explaing, "Ok well when I was like 14 I was a complete mess. One of the girls I went to school with for there for skateboarding, one time me and her went into the city. You're following right?" He nodded. 

"We would go around to all the skateparks and one time we went to one in the hoods. When I say hoods I mean this place had crack heads on every corner with syringes and all that. It was the housing commissions as well, not like the families who can't afford it, it was for the ones fresh out of jail. 

Anyway me and her are mucking about and we end up making friends with this guy called Mikey. He was like a year or two older living with his brother who was fresh out. At some point the girl had stopped coming with me so it was just me and Mikey.

Him and I would get wasted then smoke stuff and try and get high off anything we could get our hands on. At this time in my life I really didn't have anyone. My mom was to focused on my sister and her career and my brother and dad were off in France. It got to the point where I would come home once a week, wasn't going to school or practice.

Word got around and eventually someone snitched to my dad about it and I was grounded for life basically. I never really had any friends in school and I started hanging around this girl, Suki Brown. She really helped me get through that point in my life. I really wasn't happy but she was able to help me see the light. 

I had always know I had liked girls, but I had never told anyone. I was like 11 when I first realised, at first it had felt like a massive secret I was keeping from everyone but slowly it became just another thing about me. She was the first person I told and maybe like a month later she came out to me as well.

I don't really know if I liked her at that point but me and her were best friends so probably. Anyway after I turned 15 I was allowed to leave my house again but I had a curfew and my parents had my location. Me and her and had dinner then had ice cream and sat on the beach. I remember telling her I liked someone and she said same. We ended up dating for like 2 years before I ruined it. I guess she's always held a grudge against me for it."

"Ok but how did the media only just find out?" He asked with a tinge of sass.

"I never really told anyone." I shrugged. "And I would always just laugh and go along with people's jokes about that kind of stuff. Never letting the slightest hint out that I was one of them."

"Estelle..."

"I got use to it."

"But still..." He tried to argue, a concerned look on his face.

"Well now the whole world knows so it's fine." I shrugged it off.

"How'd you ruin it with her?" He asked and I swear he was nervous for my answer.

"Um I had just started F4 for the australian championship and everything was getting a lot... I ended up going back to Mikey one night and he started giving me more drugs as well as vapes. I had never done nicotine before and I got addicted to it so quickly. I kinda just shut myself off from everyone as well. My um... mental health was pretty bad. One night, high and drunk and ended up sleeping around. She found out and tried so hard to fix but I said it was over. I would of been mad as well to be honest. But publicly outing me more than 5 years that was pretty low."

I felt uneasy telling him this, I felt uneasy telling anyone about this part of my life. I look up to him scared for his reaction, "I get it." He started, "When I was little I would sometimes lose my way." 

After that we moved onto some more light hearted topics before landing in LA where we quickly made it to his mansion.

I had messaged Inez knowing she was probably shitting herself right now saying that I've got this and I was going to problem solve on the jay shetty podcast and all she needed to do was to make sure his team could get it up before we raced in Barcelona.

With the puzzle pieces the only thing that would let them fall into place was time. It was around 10pm and both me and him were exhausted. We were quick to order food from a local thai place. 

As we were waiting him and I were laughing in the kitchen as he pretended to be a bartender with his fake tequila brand. He had coated the top of my glass in sugar before pouring the drink and putting some fancy garnish on the top.

"Cheers to your podium!" I knocked my glass with his.

"Cheers!" 

I brought the glass to my lips taking a gulp of it. It tasted like actually tequila... I took another sip of it.

"You like it?" He watched me.

"Yeah... I'm just a little confused."

"You can't tell the difference can you?" He smirked crossing his arms, knowing he was right.

"Yeah... but what's the fun in no alcohol?"

"Ah come here!" He laughed pretending to be mad.

I giggled like a little girl running down the hallway but slide all over the place with my socks on. He caught up to me throwing me over his shoulders making his way back to the living room where he launched me onto the couch.

He kissed my lips as I was still laughing hysterically, he pulled away an inch, "You wouldn't be able to remember that if you were drunk?"

I pulled him back in but before I could kiss him again the doorbell rang. He ticked his tongue, "I'll get it."

I watched him walk away and that's when I realised, I was drunk but not on alcohol. I was drunk in love with him. I laughed to myself in disbelief. 

He came in skipping with with the food humming a song.

***

so much estelle lore. im aware there are many plot hole and going back and fixing this is on my to do list. I'm thinking to republish 5 chapters at a time.