The most beautiful flower | Shuca

The truth

~before you read this i would like to inform you that in this chapter the topic of self harm will be mentioned for a few sentences but nobody will actively do it. just in case some people get triggered by this. thank you for reading💜🫂~

"Bye guys, I'll make sure he gets home safely."
Waving to Mysta, Ike and Vox, Luca walked away from Vox's home with Shu, making sure to hold hid hand tightly so he couldn't get away from him.
"Luca, come on. I can get home on my own."
"No, you have to explain some things to me. But we can do that once we are in your room. For now focus ongetting home safely with me."
Walking home silently beside Luca for the whole walk, Shu was already thinking about what Luca could possibly ask him. Did Vox tell him about what he accidentally told him? Did Luca notice on his own? What was going on? It was honestly scaring him.

Arriving in front of his door, Shu was fumbling around with the keys, his hands shaking so much he accidentally let go of it and it fell down. He tried to bow down at the same time as Luca and they hit their heads on accident.
"Ow. Sorry Shu, I just wanted to get you your key. You seem really shaky, are you okay? You're not that sick, are you? Here, let me get your temperature."
He placed his hand on Shu's forehead and just like Vox before, immediatly looked concerned.
"Shu you have a fever and also a bad one. Why didn't you tell me, I would've gotten the car instead of making you walk home."
"No need to, I'm alright. Doesn't matter anyway."

The last part was just mumbled so Luca wouldn't understand it but Shu was underestimating him.
"What do you mean it doesn't matter anyway? Shu, are you really okay?"
The blonde looked way more concerned than before now, his eyes meeting with Shu's who looked away since he was going to lie to Luca.
"Yes, I'm fine. I think I may be just a bit tired."
Turning thr key around in the keyhole to finally get into his home, Shu signed for Luca to go in first and came after him, turning the key around again and then hanging it on the holder.

Luca already walking into Shu's room and sitting down on the bed looked around a bit. It looked just the same as the last time he was here, just a few more bloody tissues in the trash. And the computer- wait. Bloody tissues? Luca went over to the trashcan and looked at the interior with a worried expression.
As soon as Shu stepped into the room, he let go of the bottle in his hand and it fell down to the floor, rolling over to where Luca was standing. Both looked at each other and Luca pointed at the trashcan.
"Shu.. what is that?"
"Luca, listen. It isn't what you think."
"I don't even know what to think. What is this?!"

"It's nothing, I promise."
"Shu stop. It's not nothing, it's blood. Where is that from? What are you doing to yourself Shu?"
"No, don't think I am doing anything, here look. I am not harming myself or anything, I'm over that since many years now so I'll be fine."
Showing Luca his arms and wrists, Shu came closer to him, reaching for his hands and gently squeezing them. He had a kind look in his eyes, reassuring Luca that everything was alright.
"No, Shu. If it's not this then what happened? Also what do you mean you're over that? You used to do that?"
"See Luca, that was when I was 14, that's long ago so don't worry about it, okay? Just please don't be like the girlfriend I once had and abandon me because of that, you know since it's past and I won't to it ever again."

Luca grabbed Shu and hugged him tightly.
"I would never abandon you, even if it was recent or you would still do this. But I am glad and proud that that's not the case anymore."
Letting go of him to smile a bit but still look at Shu with sad eyes, Luca took his hand and sat down on the bed with him, pulling him close and resting his hand on Shu's back.
"So, what was that in your trash then? It looked a bit too much for you only getting a nosebleed since there are ones that looked fresher and others that looked at least a week old. Did you hurt yourself somewhere in the kitchen when cutting food?"

"No Luca, it's not this. Listen. Promise me that whatever I tell you, you will stay the same cheerful Luca I love so much."
He held up his pinky finger, wanting for Luca to promise him this way.
"I, Luca Kaneshiro hereby pinky promise to Shu that I'll stay the same, no matter what he will tell me."
Trying to act all serious to lighten up the mood, Luca intertwined his finger with Shu's and promised him what he wanted to hear.
"Thank you Luca."
Shu smiled in a weak way and took Luca's hand in his, squeezing it before he started to speak.

"Listen, when I didn't respond to your messages and calls these past days, I was actually in the hospital. I wish I could say it's nothing serious but in my case it sadly is."
Luca's grip on Shu's hand tightened.
"See, I have this illness which should usually be okay to deal with and not cause too many problems if treated in the right way but in my case it somehow got worse than any doctor expected. It has gotten to a point where they can't cure it any longer."
Luca wanted to open his mouth to say womething but Shu covered it with his hand, smiling at him.
"Let me finish telling you first. "
Luca nodded, keeping quiet and just listening to what Shu had to say.
"Okay wo it has gotten to the point where this sickness is uncurable now. I have been to the hospital many times lately and they all say the same: there is no way I will be able to overcome this. Look, I started coughing up blood every day, that's why there are so many bloody tissues in my trash. I also started losing sleep over this sickness and I lost much weight. I don't know how noticable it is since it's only about 15 kilograms so far but it is getting worse every day. Luca, you know I love you and I am sorry but this won't be my choice; I will probably die soon."

Total silence. Luca was looking at Shu and Shu at him. Nobody said a word. They both had no idea on how to talk about this and nobody broke the silence. A small tear rolled down Luca's cheek and Shu just gently wiped it away, his cold hand brushing against the warm skin. Luca took his hand and pressed it against his lips, trying to forget all sorrow and hatred he was feeling right now. He hated the world for doing this to him. They would take away his only love, how was this even fair. How could they do this to him. Who 'they' even were, Luca didn't know but he knew he hated them. He hated those people who decided that Shu would have to get this disease and one day die way too soon.

"Luca.. are you oka- ow"
Luca had bitten into Shu's hand gently, leaving a small bitemark behind which soon turned red. Something inside of Shu's stomach dropped as he saw the expression in Luca's eyes now. It looked so full of hatred but at the same time seemed to soft and fragile, as if something was messing with him internally.
"I love you Shu."
With that, Luca pulled Shu onto his lap and immediatly started to leave a trace of kisses on his neck.
"Luca what are you doi- ah"
Luca's hands had slid underneath Shu's shirt, the cold sensation making Shu feel weird inside. They were drawing small circles on his back and Shu's face started to get all flushed.
"Luca stop. What happened to you that you're suddenly.. this aggressive."
Luca not listening to what Shu was saying, continued to do what he had started, trying to blend out the fact that he would soon not be able to do this anymore.

"Luca.. what are you doing."
Luca gently bit into Shu's neck and mumbled something that Shu could only understand halfway.
"I wam o orize ... body"
Wanting to know what Luca said, Shu was poking Luca's sides so he would snap back and laugh since he was ticklish there but somehow today it wasn't working. The blonde boy was just continuing on with doing what he wanted right now, his hands now on Shu's hips instead of his back. He lifted Shu off of himself and gently layed him down on the bed, looking at his hair spreading around everywhere since it hadn't been tied together today.

"Luca.."
Shu covered his face with one of his hands, trying to hide the blush forming on his cheeks from Luca.
"Don't cover your face Shu, I want to memorize every single part of your body."
That just sent Shu's heartrate through the roof with how flustered he had suddenly gotten after this comment. He got his hand away from in front of his face now, looking into Luca's eyes which now seemed to be filled with desire for him. He wanted Shu so bad he couldn't even hide it any longer.
"I love you.."
Shu's hand was slowly going up to touch Luca's cheek and cup his cheek, which made the expression of the blonde shortly soften, before it got back to the expression full of desire. Just for a split second, Luca looked like the most fragile person on this planet but soon after the passion came back to him and he couldn't control himself any longer.

(words:1651)