56. Redemption

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Phoenix:


When you live longer like I do, grief gets harder to deal with, because you spend more time missing those you lost. 

I loved Freya. When I found her dead, something in me broke and died with her. She was an amazing girl. Kind, funny, and always smiling, lighting up the dark world we lived in among the walls of the palace.

I never forgave myself for not being there to protect her, but I also was angry at her for a decade or so for leaving me alone to deal with our parents. My love for her and her love for me wasn't enough to keep her alive, and I resented her for that. Now, after so many years have passed, I am at peace.

If I hadn't failed her, she would be an adult now, and who knows, maybe a mother. Brax would have an aunt. She would love Lilly, they would be best of friends. But because of my parents, she didn't get to live.

When I killed my father, and later my mother followed him, a chain broke around my neck and extremities, and I was able to finally breathe and savor freedom. Sadly, Freya wasn't there to taste freedom too.

I regretted not challenging my father sooner. I thought that doing it would make things worse in case I lost. He was a brute man, and sometimes I wonder if I would have been able to kill him if he wasn't drunk.

Now, thinking about her didn't hurt anymore, but I still missed her, wondering what would she have become if she was still alive.

What hadn't changed was the anger and resentment I felt toward my brothers.

If they had come to me, maybe we would have made a plan, maybe we could have challenged father together, but no, they decided to abandon me and Freya to our luck and save their own asses. I admit that I have always been closer to Freya, feeling like it was my duty to protect her as the youngest and only girl, while Lief would often spend more time with Tarek, and helping him after a beating. Nevertheless, we were siblings, we were supposed to be a team against our father's abuse.

I guess they thought of us differently.

One would think that I made peace with what my brothers had done

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One would think that I made peace with what my brothers had done. I thought so too, since I barely thought about them, and when they came to mind on that odd occasion, I felt nothing, just indifference. But after they came here, uninvited, claiming to want to meet my son, I lost it.

Now they appeared! The bastards! Why now? It's been almost two months since Brax was back in the kingdom, so why did they bother coming now? This wasn't their home anymore, they don't have a place here.

Whatever, I plan on knowing what made them think that coming here was a good idea, and then I'll kick them out.

My men have told me they were seen in the family cabin that I would use when I wanted to hunt deep in the woods of Elythia, where the wildlife was abundant with a rich ecosystem due to the humid climate.

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