Remember What We Were

Sixteen

The rain continued to pour and the thunder once again returned. Anakin shuddered at each crack of electricity as he helped Sola wash the china after breakfast.

"You really say some interesting things when you open your mouth, huh?" she asked as she ran water. Anakin stared down at the stack of plates in his hand. "I... Didn't mean to..."

Sola chuckled. "Didn't mean to make Palo look like a Nerf herder during breakfast? Sure you didn't..." she said, shaking her head. Anakin gave a guilty smile as he handed dishes to Sola.

"So are you going to talk to her?"

Anakin felt his cheeks redden for what seemed like the hundredth time. "I uh..." Sola held her hands out for the pile of used dishes. She raised her eyebrows. "What? You're not saying you actually want to help me scrub dirty dishes?" Anakin fidgeted with the mountain of plates. "Well..."

Sola smiled kindly. "Anakin," she finally said, "Padme cares about you. She may not know it herself, but she does. I see the way you look at her and I see the way she looks back. It's not complicated." Anakin sighed sadly. If only it were as simple as that.

"But we can't..." Anakin stuttered, "I don't think she wants to talk to me right now," he admitted. Sola shrugged and took the plates from him. "Go," she ordered, nudging him forward.

Anakin smiled at Sola. She was a very understanding woman, he decided. She knew what he meant even before he did. But that wouldn't make Anakin dread going to talk to Padme any less.

He found her by the window in her room, watching raindrops run down the glass. A crack of thunder caught his off guard and in turn startled Padme as well. She turned to him, wide-eyed. "What is it?" she asked in irritation. Anakin remained in the hallway outside the room.

"Padme, I just want to know what I did wrong."

Padme turned back to the gray skies. "You didn't do anything wrong. I just don't think we should be..." she said partially to herself. Anakin placed a foot in her room. "I'm not going to deny the way I feel about you!" he began with more eagerness than he intended. Padme sighed. "It won't work, Ani."

Anakin stopped short. Ani? She didn't call him that often. Only when she meant to talk down to him. When she wanted to treat him like the little boy she met on Tatooine. Why did she have to do that?

"Is this because of Palo?" he asked with his head hanging. Padme turned to look at him. He sensed her brown eyes soften. He felt the tormenting feeling of pity from her, like she empathized with him. He hated it.

Padme opened her mouth, but Anakin didn't let her speak. He ran off down the hallway and into the kitchen. Sola watched him push open the door and rush out into the rain.

It was cold as Anakin hugged his tunic closer to him. Wind whipped the rain so that it stung his face and drenched his hair. He felt his chest growing tight. Lightning lit the sky like an explosion and as Anakin blinked away rain and tears, he was transported back to Geonosis.

The rumble of the gunship rattled through his bones as Padme tumbled, over and over, just out of his reach. You could have saved her! You could have done something! But you're too weak!

"No..." Anakin whispered to himself. He was losing Padme all over again. Every memory of their relationship was nothing but lost time to Padme. She wasn't even herself lately. Too busy with Palo...

I'll hit him so hard, he'll be the one with memory loss! Anakin thought menacingly. The jealousy building in him was like a ticking time bomb. The tension only built up the more he watched Palo attempt to win over Padme.

What am I doing? Anakin ran his fingers through his soaked hair. These feelings tortured him. Despite his best efforts to seal them away, they always were festering deep inside, ready to trip him up. His inner demons- while silent- kept a firm hold on his behavior. He was a prisoner to his temper.

Now shivering in his sopping wet clothes, Anakin turned back to the doorway. Another growl of thunder was enough to coax him back indoors and Sola was in the doorway to greet him.

"Taking a shower?" she asked with an amused, and curious stare. Anakin shook his head, shaking water droplets onto the floor. "Just needed to clear my head," he replied quickly before hiding in his room.

After peeling off his wet clothes, Anakin grabbed a pair of black trousers from the dresser.

"Anakin! Did you go swimming?"

"Why don't you ever wear your pants?"

Anakin looked at the door to see Pooja and Ryoo peeking in with angelic smiles. He pulled on the trousers and sighed. "That's it..." With a swift swipe of his hand, Anakin Force pushed the door shut and locked it. From the hall, he heard a muffled giggle. "Anakin come play with us!"

Anakin flopped onto the bed and groaned. "Not this time girls..." A series of displeased cries were heard from behind the door.

"Please Anakin!"

"Pretty please!"

"Pretty please with beeble berries on top?"

Anakin rolled over and covered his ears with a pillow. "Sorry, I can't hear you!" he lied. He heard a loud knocking on the door. "ANAKIN COME PLAY WITH US!" He huffed into the pillow. He just couldn't bring himself to get up. "I can't play right now!"

"Why not?"

"Because I'm... sleeping..."

"But you're still talking."

Anakin grunted as he sat up in bed. Pooja and Ryoo wouldn't go aeay easily it seemed so he opened the door a crack with the Force. Within seconds the girls came sprinting. As they hopped up on his bed, Anakin felt a smile grow in his face.

"Auntie Padme asked us where you were!"

"What? She did?"

"But we didn't know where you went and then Palo walked by."

"Palo? What did he say?"

"I don't know."

"That's when we came to find you!"

Anakin sighed. Palo was probably selling off some sappy apology to Padme. The thought of it made him sick. As Anakin pulled on a fresh white tunic, he headed for the door. Pooja and Ryoo followed close behind. "Anakin, aren't you gonna play with us?" Pooja questioned.

Anakin stopped short. Another idea krept into his brain. He turned back to the girls.

"Actually girls, maybe we should go check on our good friend Palo..."