out of the shade

i'm the only one at the finish line

Riki's chest heaves as he sobs into his pillow, every anxious thought eating away at him. After everything, his secret ruined the best thing he's had in a long time. Sunghoon didn't want to be around him; he probably hated him. Riki always felt like Sunghoon liked him for him and that he would accept all of him even if he was initially freaked out by the truth.

Riki didn't expect him to run away.

He didn't even get a chance to explain and any semblance of acceptance he thought he gained felt like it was lost. His mind helpfully supplied that the rest of his friends probably know now too, Sunghoon shared everything with those guys and they'd all known each other for years. Riki feels sick at the thought he might lose the only people he's been able to call friends in a long time because of course people don't just accept vampires. They don't just accept some creature that they think isn't real and for so long have been depicted and described as monsters.

Maybe that's what Sunghoon thinks of him now too. He believes the very thing that killed his dad was a monster; why wouldn't he think that Riki is one too?

He doesn't hear the door open through his cries but when he looks up he sees his oldest sister

"Oh Riki..." Konon sighs sympathetically as she shuts the door and comes over to the bed to hug her little brother

Riki snuggles against the warmth of his sister, resting his head against his shoulder which at least brought some relief as he felt Konon start rubbing his back.

"I'm sorry I took so long to come. Mom and dad and Sola are worried but we didn't want to overwhelm you." Konon tells him softly, "What happened, Ki? You were gone for barely even two hours."

Riki can only cry harder at that as the feeling that he exposed his secret and his family and the community again just crushes down on him. He knows how much stress his dad went through to deal with things the first time, making so many calls and going to meetings with the counsel to ensure them that no harm would come to anyone as their secret had been exposed yet again. He knows that deep down, none of his friends? Maybe soon to be former friends will say anything but he'll feel so awful to put his dad under that strain again.

"I-I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I-I didn't mean for anything to happen. I didn't m-mean for it to h-happen a-again." Riki rambles out almost nonsensically through his cries.

He feels Konon still for a moment beside him and that tells him that she knows and she understands but Riki still says it anyway.

"S-Sunghoon found out. H-He found out I'm a vampire and he told m-me to get away from him. H-His voice was so c-cold and he was glaring at me like he h-hated me." Riki sobs out against his sister's neck, "I-I don't think he wants to be around me anymore."

"Riki..." Konon breathes out, her voice laced with pity as she tries to console him, "I doubt that. Sunghoon likes you so much, I can feel it almost every time he's outside of the house. He cares about you but he was probably just freaked out and in shock. People react differently and say things they don't mean sometimes. But that doesn't mean he hates you; I really don't think he does." Konon gently assures him.

"R-Really?" Riki stutters out as he looks up at Konon with big, trusting eyes. Through all his doubts, Konon has always been the one who could assure him, the one person that Riki could always trust to be honest with what she's saying. He knows that she means it but he's just not sure how much he believes that Sunghoon really doesn't hate him right now and that he hasn't lost the relationships he's built over the past couple of months.

Konon's heart clenches in her chest as she gently pats Riki's soft hair, "Yeah really. And you have nothing to be sorry for Ki; just like last time : it's not your fault. Do you want me to keep it a secret for you?"