Lost In Her Mind

14. Gone for Good

       The bright moon poured in through the window and managed to light up the dark room. With his back towards me I was able to admire the tensed muscles underneath, his steady breathing the only sound in the room. 

   His intoxicating scent the only thing calming me over what had just taken place.

    " Did you want it to happen?" He asked, I watched his body tense even more. Part of me wanted to reach out and trace his shoulder blades with my fingertips.

     "No." I answered. I watched his body relax as his fists began to unravel.

      "So, what, you were planning on just lying there and not defending yourself?"

    I sat in silence, not knowing how to answer his question, how to be able to try and make him understand because truth was, there was no way to understand me. Not even I understood myself, I didn't understand my own mind, it was lost quite a while ago.

 His body began to turn, and he came face to face with my own, and for once my stomach didn't twist as I watched the moonlight dance throughout his hair, highlighting his features. 

He looked at me for a moment before turning his head towards the open door.

 "Your family will be leaving the day after tomorrow; I think it's best you leave with them." He muttered as he stroked his hand through his hair and with that he exited without another word, leaving me standing there alone.

  I managed to walk to the door and close it. Turning around I pressed my back against the hard wood and dropped down to the floor. I stared out the window upon the bright half-moon and starry sky left alone in my own thoughts.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

   It was the day to finally leave. Not once had I layed my eyes upon Alpha Jax or Alpha Zine since the other night. Part of me both relieved and another part of couldn't help but look for Alpha Zine in every place I went just hoping to be able to steal a glance.

Yet here I was standing next to my father's vehicle ready to depart.

    "Are you ready to leave?" Xavier asked as he walked up to me. 

    "As much as I will ever be." I managed to mutter. Xavier placed his hand on top of my head and leaned down a little to meet me in my eyes.

     "It will be ok." Was all he said, and yet for once his words gave me no comfort.

    I felt a pair of arms wrap around me as my father's scent erupted through my nose.

   "It will be alright darling; you will have another chance to find your mate. Until then your still all mines." He smiled. Little did he know. Little did they all know.

  I was the first to notice his presence as the smell of oak began to choke me. Turning I saw Alpha Zine and Beta William make their way up to us.

"It was very nice to have you guys here, we will have to do this another time." Alpha Zine held out his arm as my father gripped his forearm.

"We very much appreciate everything; we are grateful for your hospitality."  

"Do we really have to go?" Andrew wined as he bounced over with a group of boys his own age. At least someone got to enjoy their time here.

My father laughed.

"I'm afraid so, it's time to go." With that we all began piling into the car. My father driving, Xavier in the passenger seat and Andrew and I in the back. Apparently, Vince would be driving a separate car with Alice. Part of their "bonding." 

As the car began to drive, I couldn't help it as I turned around in my seat peeking out the back window. Beta William and Alpha Zine stood in the center of the road watching us go. If I looked hard enough, I could still see the blueness of Alphas Zine's eyes. As I turned back forward a large lump began to form in the back of my throat.

I've never felt this way before, and I didn't understand it.

Xavier peeked into the backseat for a moment, his own eyes meeting mine. And I knew, he understood.

----------------------------------------------------------------

Zine's Pov.

 As the car slowly began to drive away, I stood in the road along with William. My body felt sick, almost like I wanted to run to the side and let go of everything inside of my stomach.

  I watched as she turned around in the seat and looked at me through the blackness of the back window, I swallowed down the lump that was forming in my throat as I looked at the beauty of her face one last time.

This was for the best. It had to be.

And yet, as she turned back around it made me want to chase after the car and rip her right out of the seat.

Do it. My wolf whined.

We can't.

"You're going to regret this." William said.

I already was, and yet, I couldn't stop that it was for the best. For both her and I. It was the only way to protect us both.

I turned and began my walk towards the open woods, desperately needing to release my wolf, knowing this would be the last time I would see those green eyes.