Hate yourself [mlm]

Once in a lifetime moment

[Vincent's pov]

I shyly look away from Mitchell but he gets the feeling that this isn't over

He has the right idea

He grabs at my shirt and kisses me hard

He straddles me on the mattress and I hug him tightly

It only takes a few seconds before we have to separate our lips and gasp for air

He smiles at me, still above me and holding onto the fabric of my shirt

"Maybe..  I do wanna go too far with you.."

He says breathily,  my heartbeat speeds up a little

I swallow hard  "you're terrible"

He grins and runs his fingers through my hair

His hand runs down my neck and down to my chest..

Then down to my hip..

He hesitates before moving my shirt up a little..  exposing the skin of my abdomen

He looks at me for any sign of approval..

God he's so cute

I smile nervously at him and rest my hands on his thighs,  moving him down so that he's pretty much sitting on me in a compromising position

It is strangely comfortable though..

He lifts my shirt up over my head to take it off and I feel the urge to cover myself,  but I don't want to take my hands off his thighs..

"Are you okay?"  His voice lowers to a soothing tone

I nod  "yeah..  I'm fine..  just feel a bit awkward.."

"Hey..  we don't have to do this is you're uncomfortable..  I understand completely..  I'd never force you to do anything.. I care about you"

...

I stay silent for a moment before answering..  he hasn't made any further moves this entire time

"What?"  He asks,  arms retreating to his sides 

"Well..  you seem really hesitant about this whole thing..  I'm more concerned about whether you wanna do this or not.."

He doesn't answer,  he gets off me and throws my shirt at me

"I do wanna do this..  this is about you..  I swear.."

I put my shirt on  "I know it's not..  I just have a question for you..  if you don't wanna be intimate like that..  why did you kiss me?  Why did you get on top of me like that?  I didn't tell you to do any of that.."

He sighs  "I..  I did enjoy doing those things..  and..  that's because I love you..  I really do.  This isn't experimental to me..  this is genuinely what I wanna do with you.."

"Then..  why were you so uncomfortable all of a sudden?"

He refuses to make eye contact now..  I can tell he's not feeling the best..

"I can't tell you.  There is a reason,  but..  I don't think you should know."

I decide not to push him for answers..  I'm curious..  of course I am..  but..  I care about him..  and his feelings come first..

"That's okay.."

...

[Mitchell's pov]

It's been a couple hours since Vincent left..

I was so close to having the best experience of my entire life but..

I had to ruin it somehow

He's probably never gonna try anything like that with me ever again..

...

☆彡
Note: dw guys he probably will