JORDAN

TWENTY TWO; A STAT

He handed me another sheet, his voice going on and on - in horrendous detail about the level of cuttings.

I felt like he was pouring acid directly into my soul, reliving the betrayal, hurt and confusion the people I trusted most in this world put me through.

"Sometimes women run into complications because they're sewn so much, they can have urinary problems, does it hurt when you pee?"

He paused to look at me and I'm not sure what my face conveyed to him in that moment because he skipped over his question and carried on talking.

I knew all of this. When I first got my period I had difficulties passing blood, I went to a doctor without my mom knowing and got cut open. I count my blessings for that complication because otherwise loosing my virginity would've been excruciating.

"People are literally slicing these kids up because it's the 'normal thing to do' in their society. Your crazy ass family believed if they cut you it would lower your sex drive, a way to keep you a virgin until marriage. A way to prevent infidelity when you are married. Thats why you were cut, can you believe that?"

He gave me another piece of paper, this time pointing out things on the sheet. I looked down, morphing the pictures and text into blurred passages because I couldn't focus.

"Makes perfect sense why you can't orgasm now, it's all linked. The clitoris is probably what gives you the most intense sensations. Did you know only 18% of women can reach orgasm through penetrative sex alone?"

I'm a stat. I'm 18% of women.

"Throw in the combination of fucking a stranger who doesn't know your body and the alcohol consumption - which naturally dehydrates your body so it's leaving less lubrication down there, it's no surprise the odds aren't in your favour. Do you normally do foreplay? How are these guys stimulating you? How are you stimulating yourself?"

He handed me another sheet and tapped his fingers on the stack of paper in my hand.

"I told you that you were going about this in the wrong way and that was before I knew all of the facts, the proof is right here in the pudding Tia. Read it for yourself."

I threw the paper stack at him and he lifted his hands to shield himself from the rainfall.

"How dare you?!" I spoke through my teeth, releasing my anger and frustrations out on him.

"What?!" He yelled in a high pitched squeal of surprise. He watched me stand up and shake the bedsheets away from me.

I was ready to exit, without looking back. I was ready to leave and never speak to this asshole ever again.

"You don't bother to do your own college assignments but you can sit there and do this much research on me like I'm a gerbil trapped in a cage waiting to be experimented on?"

"I was trying to help you and you literally throw it back in my face! What the fuck?"

"This!" I picked up a sheet of paper and waved it at him. "This isn't helping. I'm not an abnormally that you should be researching. What happened, happened. It's done. You can't change that. It can't be fixed. All of this—" I waved my hand over the mess of research, "your idea of help is so cold. I didn't tell you what happened because I wanted to know facts and see scientific diagrams, Jordan. I just wanted you to be there. I woke up from a nightmare upset, I wanted comforting and support."

He didn't say anything.

"I was stupid for thinking I could ever get that from you. All I got out of this was you slating my family and telling me 'I told you so.' That procedure was done on me out of love. My family had my best interests at heart. They didn't want society to view me as some cheap, dirty whore. They didn't want me to struggle finding a good, respectable husband."

He started shaking his head, "no Tia, that's not—"

"Were you circumcised at birth?"

"Of course but that's not the same."

"And I'm assuming you don't think your family are crazy abusive cunts for allowing a newborn baby to go through that?"

"There are beneficial reasons for a male circumcision, it's not the same."

"Like?"

"Well for one - it helps keep everything clean."

"No Jordan, soap does that." I laughed cynically. "So you don't even know the reasons why a part of your dick is missing? But you're coming at me and my family for the procedures upheld in my home country for centuries?"

He looked confused.

"There has to be reason, my mom and dad wouldn't agree to—"

"It's not a common procedure in Europe, you know that? Unless medically or religiously necessary, men in Europe don't typically get circumcised. It's only done here because it's the society norm, I've been with men who still have their foreskin and let me tell you something, that little shield of skin protects the nerves. When that skin is removed those nerves toughen up so you loose around 50% of sensation. You can never enjoy sex to the same levels a British man can purely down to a decision your parents made for you at birth."

Now he looked mortified, I'd usually find that funny but on this occasion I was far too upset to see the humour in anything.

"I wasn't born here Jordan. Things are different back home. How they parent, different laws, different norms. I was just looking for a friend in the moment I felt like I needed one the most. Instead I got a pompous ass who rounded up his lecture with 'I told you so.'"

"I wanted to help you. I called my family doctor for you. I set you up an appointment, told him everything and he was going to see what help he could offer you. You're an ungrateful bitch."

I paced the room, pulling on my own hair in frustration.

"You completely overstepped! Doctors, lawyers, support groups, fact sheets? Why would you think I wanted any of that?"

I stopped pacing and paused to look at him, "You know what Jordan?"

"What?"

"I was stupid to come here for many reasons. I can't hide from my parents forever. I realise everything they do or have done has come from a place of love. They discipline me out of love, they cut me because they care about my integrity and public image. They raised me to be respectful, to have morals and be upstanding. I shouldn't have walked away from that, especially not to here.

I was stupid to think we could ever see eye to eye for longer than five minutes. I was stupid to hope there was more between us than just disagreements and feuding all the time. You're Jordan Peers and I'm Tia Adeniji, we don't gel well together.

I promised Caoihme I'd watch her debut at cotillion tomorrow night, so if it's okay with you, I'll stay here one more night. I doubt we'll have to bother with each other much after that, my parents will make me leave college so I won't need a ride back."

"If that's what you want, I'm not going to stop you." He folded his arms childishly.

"That's what I want."

"Fine." He was mad.

"Fine." So was I.