Epilogue: Wanderer

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The space between the stars was beautiful, it went beyond words. All of the other side did. You could watch the entire world without ever moving, or focus on one person to watch their lives like a movie. There wasn't much else you could do however. Watching, that was all I could do. I couldn't comfort the men and women who cried out for help. I couldn't save Adrian as he screamed in agony as Finistère killed him just as it had me.

I was merely an observer as governments fell, and people rebelled bringing anarchy. The disease spread faster than anyone could have dreamed possible, it wiped out an entire country in a day, a continent in a week. Billions died. Millions died cursing my name. I watched as they burned my body. As crowds celebrated in the streets singing the praises of my demise.

They had every right too. I deserved it, every trace of pain I had suffered when before I had passed on had been deserved too.

Only one person died with love in their hearts for me: Adrian. Even as he thrashed and cried out while Davina tended him he held the letter I had scowled out for him before I had left. I had watched him read it so many times I could have recited it by heart even if I hadn't written it.

Adrian,

I had written.

There are not enough ways to apologize for what I have done, for what will happen to you. I could spend a lifetime apologizing and it still wouldn't be enough. You loved me when you knew you shouldn't have, and for that I'll be forever grateful. I wish I had gotten the chance to return that love- to lower my walls and let you in, but that won't happen. As you read this I will probably be taking my last breath. My mother used to talk about a place called Heaven where we would see all our loved ones again when we die, I hope that someday I'll see you there and be worthy of you and your forgiveness.

Hopefully Yours,
Neoma Casimir

When he had passed into the void I'd heard him whisper "I'm coming Neoma." Just as he drifted of into eternity. His soul had flown straight past me sailing straight for Heaven as he was welcomed through those golden gates that had scorned me.

I was trapped here on Earth to observe what I had done, the gates of Heaven were locked shut and the pits of Hell were all filled up. I was what was known as a Wanderer of the Between. I could see the spirit world, but I could never fully enter it, the same as it was with Earth. I was stuck in between the two.

Sometimes I watched as the final few remaining governments fell, as the world erupted into chaos. Buildings, towns, and entire countries burned leaving nothing, but ashes in their wake. People turned on one another fighting for food, for shelter, water, anything that might help them survive.

But mostly I watched them.

Davina and Dimitri had found each other, and what had formed between the two was breathtaking. Never had I imagined such a love like the one they shared. No matter what happened they got through it, survived and helped who they could. The cure had made them absolutely immune, Finistère couldn't touch them.

Occasionally I would try to stray from them and go closer to the golden gates in the stars above me, but I always felt more solid around them, needed.

It was like a tether attached me to them never letting me cross over to the other side. I could try, but the furthest I ever got was the edge of the starry sea that separated Earth from the other side. Sometimes I saw Adrian waiting at the gates looking for me, hoping that I would be granted entrance, but I know that won't happen for a while. My work here isn't finished, not by a long shot.

There's still something holding me here, or someone. So I will stay and fight to right the wrongs I have caused, to protect my loved ones. My body may be long gone; burned to ash, but my spirit has never been more alive.

Adrian and I will have to wait to have our reunion, and the golden gates in the clouds above will remain shut, but they will open one day. So I content myself to smile and wave at Adrian each day as I watch over those I care about.

Because I know that someday when I have atoned my sins I'll be welcome on the other side, and he'll be waiting.

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