The Deal

Fourteen-Bernadette

Since I decided not to waste time falling in between sleep by going into another trance, I Uber'd myself back home to think of my next plan. What I didn't expect to find during the ride home was the dozens of notifications on my phone saying I have ten missed calls from Yvonne. I relax, realizing they popped up a couple of hours before I woke up at the clinic. Five text messages included as well; 'I heard what happened!' 'Is your head okay? Please, tell me you're alright.' 'I understand if you can't reply, so I'll give you the time you need.'

The other two are sent recently. It's so good to have someone care about you that much. When I get home, I brace myself. Reflecting on all the things I want to tell my best friend, be it good or bad. I scan the contact list, and my God, do I have lots of friends. How did I get to know so many of these people? Did they care about me? It's obvious they were living perfect lives by the time I got stuck on coma. My husband and Yvonne were the only people I saw and heard beside my bed. My pulse rate quickens when I dial Yvonne, and its followed by an instant response.

"Bee! Oh, thank the heavens. Please tell me yuh okay. I couldn't sleep last night because I had some form of sixth sense. I had a feeling something was wrong with yuh."

I sigh, climbing the stairs to head to my room. "It's only a bump to the head. I'll live. I saw your earlier missed calls. What was it you-"

"Oh, yeah. I....I was going to talk to you about the situation last night. I just wanted to say I'm sorry if the news came so sudden. l didn't mean to catch yuh by surprise like that."

"I perfectly understand your fears, Yvonne." I hurl one of my wardrobes open, and scan through the lines of colorful wigs resting on plastic dummy-heads. "I admit I may not be mentally prepared for acting as of now, but if you throw me out of the cast, think of the ratings we would lose. I'm the one carrying the show. Please, let do this for you."

Yvonne groans. "Bee. You were found unconscious hours ago. Please, don't get yourself worked up over this."

"Hey, you remember when you told me you went through hell to get the TV networks to pitch this show? Remember what you said when we were in college? Remember the real reason why you wanted me to be the lead in Bad Habits?"

"Oh, Blurtnawt!" Yvonne curses, her Jamaican Patwah getting stronger now she's in distress. "Don't yuh dare use this to talk me out of it."

"A couple of days after coma, you said my role as Aneska changed my life. The random DM's I got from men, telling me about their dirty fantasies of me as the character. You told me the role in the sitcom would set me free from the Soap Opera controversies." I grab the purple wig and test it on my head. "I'm not doing this for my career, I'm doing this for you. Back in film school, you'd always tell me,' Bee, one day I'm gon' produce meh own sitcom and meh show gon' top Fresh Prince o' Bel Air'."

Yvonne bursts into a forced chuckle. "I never sounded like that."

"Whatever. Remember the countless times you had to pitch Bad Habits to networks? This project has been your baby, and now look, you've finally achieved your dream. I'll finish this till the last season, no matter what shit I'm going through. Because I'm doing it for my true friend."

"For God sake, Bee. This dumb show could get cancelled right this minute as we speak. Bad Habits is irrelevant. You're the one I care about the most."

"Well, this dumb show is important to me, because of you. So, I'm telling you, you'd have to kill me if you don't want me to keep playing Puleng."

Yvonne grunts as I catch my reflection on the mirror. I slowly rip the bandage off the wound on my left-side forehead. "Bee, let's sleep on this, alright? We'll discuss later."

"Wait. Can you please give me Jabar's address?" I rush to the desk and grab pen and a paper pad.

"Uh, okay." I jot it down as she spills it to me, then memorize it at the back of my head.

"Why? You planning on seeing him?"

"Do you remember Bill?" Silence radiates for a couple of seconds.

"Who's Bill?"

I nudge my jacket off and strip from my trousers. "I haven't told you about my stalker, have I?" Was the question directed to her or myself, I don't know.

"Bee, what the hell are yuh saying? Yuh not making sense right now. Who is Bill, and when did you have a stalker?"

Thabo did say that I didn't want my best friend knowing about the occurring Bill incidents, all because I didn't want to stress her out. I guess the old me was very complicated. Finally coming out to tell her has caused a sudden tension to lift itself from my shoulders. "Yvonne, I'm sorry but I kept some secrets from you...before the crash. A fan of mine, named Bill, used to send me letters to my mail, because in his deranged mind, I was the promiscuous seventeen-year-old, Aneska. He grew obsessed when I refused to reply him back, and then one night, he even attacked me. But when I stabbed him in self-defense, he got away. I think he had something to do with the accident."

A silence echoes for a while, and I wonder if this big reveal has caused her to pass out. "Yvonne," I call out. There's no reply. I pause for a second. "Please talk to me."

"Why are you now telling me this? Yuh chose to tell me this after yuh almost died?" She scoffs. "I don't believe yuh, Bee. You're obviously confused or mixing up memories."

I sigh. "Yvonne, I'm serious. I knew the right thing to do was to tell you but I didn't want you involved. I'm so sorry. He knows I'm alive and now he's taunting me."

"Are yuh fucking kidding me?! You know what? You're lucky yuh memories are not intact cause I would have marched over to yuh house and deal with yuh." Yvonne pauses. "Bee, don't do anything that will get you hurt,' she says, anger slowly dissipating in her voice. "Stay home and be careful. I'll come over to you in an hours time and then we're having a really long talk."

"Okay. I promise I'll stay put. I'll wait for you."

"Yuh better." When the call cuts, I head to the cabinet in the bathroom and grab my bottle of pills. After chugging two down with a glass of tap water, I undress fully, wondering how I'll sneak past the officer that's watching over my house in order to get to Jabar.