III. In Her Head (Bada POV)

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Life has a way of staying out of reach when we hold too tightly to our expectations.

After class, she had expected things to progress. Maybe he'd stay for her class more regularly, they'd talk after and get into deeper conversations. Eventually go out for nearby drinks or food.

However, the next weeks, he seemed always on the go. He'd leave soon after his class, cutting short even small talk with his students. During the few Just Jerk socials, he was noticeably absent. When she passed him at the Academy, they'd greet each other, but she sensed more politeness than warmth.

She's not one to dwell on guys nor did she have idle time to fantasize. Her work projects have been taking off, and her schedule is packed. SM liked her recent Aespa choreography and immediately requested her for more work. She is teaching across two studios and guesting regularly at training camps.

Still, in the quiet of night when the adrenaline wound down, her thoughts would stray to him. She replayed their interactions, the signs she thought he gave. But the last weeks made her doubt if it were all in her head. Perhaps she read too much into the sweetness of his words, the directness of his gaze. She had thought they were in a pas de deux, but her real partner seemed her own imagination.

She rolls onto her side, wrapping her hand under her pillow. A sense of dread grips her: that history is repeating itself.

During her early dance career, it happened often. Given her dance style, she often danced in mostly male crews, and most of her friend circles consisted of guys. There was one, Jaejoong, whom she got along with, and they'd often choreograph together for showcases. People constantly asked if they were dating. She was convinced they were building towards something, albeit slowly.

One night after rehearsal, as they stopped by their usual kimbap stall, he asked her to introduce him to one of her female friends, who was relatively reserved with stunning model looks. Bada still remembers the sinking in her heart. Of course that's the type guys go for.

Over recent years, she build a growing number of fans. People were drawn to her, some complained, even when she did nothing. She easily attracted admirers, but being admired was not the same as being connected.

She exhales softly. No, history wouldn't repeat itself.

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