Born To Die | Vanessa Afton

10

Your leg trembled nervously, bouncing up and down in the chair you were sitting in. It was obvious you were nervous, you hated the idea of going alone on your usual night shift, it absolutely terrified you. Whether it was what happened the other night with the children or just the mere fact that you would be leaving Vanessa. 

Before this whole situation, you had never even seen her, you were pretty sure she had never even walked past you, you had only heard of her name being mentioned a few times by coworkers who clearly didn't trust her. You were always early to your shifts and Vanessa always arrived on the dot after picking you up so you were convinced that you would hardly see her, especially if you do the same shifts as before. It was embarrassing sitting here with her next to you. Everyone knew that if you were on those chairs, you were in trouble of some sort. You looked to her, she seemed so normal.

You were so wrong, inside, Vanessa was panicking. She had just about gotten through to you and she somewhat trusted you and you hoped you trusted her (despite the many lies she told you) so leaving you all alone was going to be hard. However, she had to remind herself that you were no child, you were pretty much her age. She thought that you had already gotten bored of her, that you were glad that you could finally go alone. It reminded herself of when she first met you. You weren't hostile but you weren't necessarily nice. It was clear you were frustrated. 

She had tried to get you to talk multiple times that first shift by asking questions but you would normally immediately reply with one word answers and tried to shut down the conversation as soon as possible. She was glad you had warmed up to her to some extent. Obviously, she saw you as quite a close friend, something she never really had. Then again, if she got rid of you, it would make her 'jobs' a lot easier. Her father wasn't fond of you, of course, you didn't know and Vanessa didn't want you to know.

"Are you two doing alright?" And there she was standing, your boss. You had just nodded as you stood up, Vanessa quickly followed suit as Roberts, Vanessa only knew this now because of the massive badge on her jacket, led you both to her office. Sitting down, you were almost immediately fidgeting and looking down, away from the other two. "Well, Shelly, how has everything been?"

Vanessa had almost forgotten her last name, she had been so focused on what was going on her head instead of what was happening in the real world. She woke up out of her state after about two seconds when you had looked to her curiously to why she wasn't talking. She cleared her throat hastily. "Yeah. She's been fine. I... I mean I do most of the talking so if you wanted to I could get her to take lead for a week or so?"

"Well... Has she been rude in any way to anyone? Including you?" She had asked, scribbling something down on a sticky note, tilting it up so neither of you could see what she was writing. To be honest, it wasn't like you could read her handwriting anyway. You were initially shocked that Vanessa had suggested you staying with her for another week, you just hoped Roberts would approve but she wasn't one to keep officers together. She had looked between the two of you suspiciously as Vanessa stayed quiet, as if she was thinking about it.

"No... As I said, I do most of the talking." Vanessa said, reiterating her point from before. She had hummed, writing something else down.

"That's fine, Shelly, your dismissed, wait in the office please." Vanessa only nodded, walking out of the room without looking back. When she closed the door, you immediately met eyes with Roberts. Her eyes narrowed at you.

"What would you call you and her?" She asked at out the blue. You sat there, half confused, trying to figure out what she was referring to. She sighed, her elbows reaching the tables as she leant forward to get a better look at your expression. "Alright, I'll be straight forward. Are you dating her?"

"W-Well! That is- no. No we are not, she's just a coworker." You said, trying not to exaggerate anything. Yeah... She's just a coworker, one that you really didn't want to leave, one that made your heart flutter whenever she did anything. God, what were you thinking? Even though you weren't dating her, actually far from it, you still had difficulty saying you weren't as if you had to lie. At the very most, you had some feelings for her. Even then, you doubted it, you just hadn't been in a relationship for a while, maybe that's why all these thoughts are rushing through your head.

"Okay, just needed to make sure. You do know that if you don't go alone, the board will force me to fire you." She said. Her expression was plain, one with almost no emotion, she didn't care, you could tell. Well, you had caused her a lot of stress by just basically being a nuisance. Your eyes widened at her statement once it had fully sunk in. 

"What? Why!" You asked. Roberts was clearly somewhat confused. You were silent when with Vanessa but suddenly once she's gone, you were loud like before. For a moment, she thought Vanessa had done something to make you like this and to be honest, she probably would have praised her for it. A hefty sigh came out this time, replacing the soft one. You should know why.

"Your practically useless with Vanessa. Plus you know the board doesn't like you. You had to stay before because of your dad but now he's gone, well, it's our choice." She said, with a small shrug. Your face scrunched up at the sound of his name. He had saved up a large sum of money to keep you in the police force as long as he's around, and he left. Your mother left with him to a different country, they said that Utah was cursed. They hadn't even offered for you to come. In a letter that came days after, they said you were the source of their unhappiness, like you had caused this whole town to be known for kidnapping and murders.

You hadn't said anything in reply, surprising Roberts. You always had something to say, even if it was unnecessary and unimportant. This was the woman who had also hired you all those years ago, She sighed, not believing what she was about to say. "Two weeks." You looked up to her, your eyebrows furrowing. "Two more weeks with Shelly before you need to go alone. I suggest you start talking. Your dismissed."

Nodding, you had left before she could change her mind. Escaping her office made you take a deep, grateful breath. You walked up to Vanessa, who was talking to the lady at the front office. She turned to you once the lady had turned away to do more work. "Apparently that was all that we had to do today. So, what did she say."

"Two weeks with you." You had mumbled, "I'm going to go home." Vanessa had watched you walk away. You were fine this morning, chatty to an extent, of course you were worried. Was two weeks too long for you? Had she made a mistake by saying you weren't exactly perfect. You hadn't made it clear to her whether you wanted to stay or not. All she wanted to do was make you happy.