chapter 17: a fine line

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2022
Seoul, South Korea
24th of December



"Hyung, we're going to take a group photo," Jungwon elbows Jake to get his attention.

"Oh," Jake's interrupted from his thoughts as he nods and follows the leader.

They're backstage at the SBS Gayo Daejun festival, after having finished their performance. In addition to performing their own song, ParadoXXX Invasion, they've also covered BTS's Dope. The past month and a half has been a busy one because as soon as they finished their Japan tour, they began preparing for the end of the year award shows and festivals.

"Our Gayo Daejun stage has come to an end, but Sunghoon hyung still has his special performance left," Jungwon speaks to the camera filming them.

"We'll be watching," Heeseung, who's still in a lower posing position at the front next to Jake, looks up at Sunghoon.

"I feel nervous without you guys," says Sunghoon and Jake slightly turns around to tap his arm in encouragement.

"We'll be monitoring and cheering you on," Jungwon assures Sunghoon, who smiles.

Sunghoon will be dancing to BTS's Black Swan with his childhood friend and fellow figure skater, Cha Jun Hwan. The week leading up to this, Jun Hwan has been coming to Hybe to learn the choreography with Sunghoon, but Jake hasn't had the chance to see any of their practice sessions due to separate schedules.

"Are you okay, Jake hyung?" Jungwon arches his eyebrows when Jake realizes that the cameras are no longer filming them and everyone's moved a few steps, except for him.

"You're spacing out a lot lately, even more than Sunghoon hyung, who's typically like that," he remarks and Jake's eyes widen.

"N-no, I'm not," Jake tries to deny it, but Jungwon looks unconvinced. The latter doesn't insist though, because they're ushered by the staff back to their green room.

However, Jake is aware that recently, he's been zoning out frequently and he only has Sunoo to blame for it. If Sunoo hadn't suggested that he might have feelings for his best friend, maybe Jake wouldn't be losing focus on a daily basis when people are talking to him or he needs to do something. As if his dream wasn't enough to deal with, Sunoo just had to make Jake question some of his real life interactions with Sunghoon.
It seems like no matter how much Jake wants to forget, it all circles back to that one summer night after that party. Sure, ending up on top of Sunghoon was a slip, but Jake's heart rate shouldn't have quickened the way it did. The same applies to when they were ice skating together and Jake dragged his best friend down on purpose, for what he called fun. He should've definitely refrained from doing that.

And then, there are the minor, trivial things that Jake's never really paid attention to, before. How Sunghoon always helps him put on and take out his contact lenses gently or offers him extra food. How Sunghoon instantly manages to calm him down by holding his hand when he's nervous or how he stepped out of his comfort zone to attend a party just so Jake wouldn't be alone.

Jake has always believed that there is an invisible yet defined line between being friends with someone and liking them romantically. A line that's easy to distinguish between. But now, that line has suddenly become blurry in regards to Sunghoon...

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