There is No Epic Loot Here, Only Puns

4: The Piggy in the Middle

Delta didn't have to wait long for Hob and Gob.

They announced themselves with a screech and an oink as they barrelled into the dungeon.

Delta's mouth dropped open as they carried a rather large pig into the tunnel, the animal squirming and squealing just as loudly as the goblins.

"Mans!" Hob warned. Gob just screamed as the pig bit him.

Fran stood with a sharp look and rushed off towards the entrance, turning the corner in the new tunnel.

Gob threw the pig down and Delta closed her eyes for the next part but soon felt mana flow towards her.

It was plump and calm. Delta enjoyed the feeling, this feeling was much better than-She gagged and her sight shot open as Hob dropped the dreaded mushrooms all over the dungeon floor. Delta bent over and felt winded as the vile taste of mushrooms overwhelmed her senses.

"Man!" Gob shouted again and Delta tried to inhale as she watched her mana number grow.

From a measly six all the way to twenty.

The pig just gave her 15 mana in a single pop. The remaining mushrooms pushed past her limit and struggled to reach a number beyond her max.

Twenty-five.

Then it began to trickle down as the excess mana seemed to leak away.

That was enough for her new monster if she hurried! Delta stumbled to her feet and to the first bend in her dungeon. She picked a spot close to the wall as the three goblins made warning noises at the person approaching the dungeon entrance.

Delta focused.

"Mushroom Spitter!" she ordered, and she saw her orb pulse once. Then from the ground, a cap appeared, it grew rapidly until Delta was staring at a mushroom almost as big as a child and firmly anchored in the ground. Then the living fungus wriggled and the stalk split apart horizontally to reveal a big toothy maw filled with some vicious green liquid, she would later deny having squealed in fright in any way, shape or form.

It gurgled at the dungeon as it blinked its two beady glowing eyes. It seemed to send some mental 'I live to serve' feeling at her before it focused intently on the corner where her goblins seemed to roar.

Delta ordered them all back, curious to see what her new mushroom could do.

The grey flesh and dark cap made it blend well into the dungeon. It was then that Delta finally noticed that her dungeon was almost pitch black beyond the first turn. Didn't dungeons have eternal torches or glow bugs?

Did she see in some... UV or night vision? Mana vision?

Mushy, she deemed him, wriggled as the goblins ran past, understanding them as 'Dungeon', letting them past albeit with a sense of annoyance to him.

Delta knew, just knew, if one of them had bumped into it, it would have chomped down with a vengeance. It didn't seem to really like anything other than its damp wall.

"Blasted gobs! Just get back here and give me back my pig!" a man shouted, his voice more angry than afraid. He turned the corner and Delta blinked as the man held a small... gun?

Delta came closer, nervous but the man didn't seem to sense her. The 'gun' was a stone device held in two hands, a small red crystal plugged into the handle and the wide muzzle of the gun had an almost cartoonish iron-sight.

Delta goggled at it, trying to understand what she was looking at. The crystal glowed orange and Delta tried to see inside but the man moved through her. As the man drew neared too close Mushy did what Delta guessed was what Mushy would do in any circumstance.