The 8th Sparrow

Amish Klaus

We pulled up to what looked like a village of pilgrims. I looked around excitedly at the cows and wonderful structures. I rolled down the window slightly to get a good sniff of the air. It felt so fresh, so happy. 

"Son of a bitch! Klaus is Amish." Five exclaimed as if he'd just figured out an equation.

"Oh my gosh! It makes so much sense!" I added, laughing uncontrollably.

"This explains everything."

"How does this explain anything?" Five asked confused.

"Because look! Look at this place! This is everything my childhood was missing."

"Same.." I mumbled.

"Hey, uh, Klaus?" Five paused him.

"Yeah?"

"Wait up a minute. Doppelgänger check. You feel anything strange? Uh, itching, sweats, gas, anything like that?" Five asked seriously to Klaus.

"Yeah we don't want any Paradox Psychosis happening, especially with him." I chuckled.

"No. No, I feel great. Apart from the old rash on the tackle, but what can you do?" I cringed as Klaus happily said with a little bit of over sharing.

"All right, good luck." Five said, trying to send him off.

"What? Wait, you guys aren't coming?" Klaus said nervously.

"This one you gotta do alone." Five gave him a reassuring pat on the back.

'Alone? Yeah, okay. Yeah, I can do that, sure." Klaus said, acting like a kid on the first day of school.

Klaus walked away as me and Five got back in the car. He turned the radio on and played old music. Oh how I enjoyed old music. I missed it.

"You have good music taste." I randomly say when Five sits back, grabbing the map.

"Well thank you Devon." Five raises his eyebrows. "No one else seems to think so." 

I reached down at the airplane bottle in the floor and read the label which read 'Four Roses'. I took a sip and was shocked at the strength. I smacked my lips and sighed, feeling the whiskey burn my throat a little. 

"Whoa this shit's strong, Five." I looked at the boy with sunglasses on as he's circling places on the map.

"No way, you're just a pussy." Five scoffed, grabbing the bottle and placing it to his lips. He took a sip and widened his eyes. "Well it's definitely stronger than I thought it'd be, I'll admit that." He chuckled, looking into my eyes.

We sat for a bit and I closed my eyes and listened to the music. I had my hands behind my head and Five started singing to the music. It was very peaceful, listening to music, nature, and Five singing. I could smell the grass, the trees, and the crops. 

"So.." Five cleared his throat, turning down the radio. "How'd you end up like.. that?" He circled his hands in the air at me.

"Oh uh.. Shadow realms, time travel, the Commission, and stuff." I rolled my eyes.

"Wait.. The Commission!?" He widened his eyes in surprise.

"Yeah..?" I looked at him confused before I realized the very little space between us.

"I uhm.." He started, backing up a bit, then grabbing my hand, intertwining his fingers with my own. "I worked there too. For many years.." I looked down at our hands. I blushed as he lifted my face and leaned in, kissing me. I kissed back passionately, getting on top of him, and grinding my hips on him. We were interrupted by a wave which took away all of the cows from the field. 

"What the--" Five muttered, stepping out of the car, hands in mine still. He looked around and noticed the missing cows.

"Weren't there.. cows..?" I said, pausing.

"Oh, can't I get one fucking day off?" Five threw his arms and shoulders down.

We started grabbing two markers and writing equations, figuring out what was going on. I learned about all kinds of stuff like this in the Commission so I had an idea. 

"So you were in the Commission too?" Five asked over from the other side of the car.

"Yeah, a long time." I sighed. 

"I hated that hell-hole.." He chuckled awkwardly, pausing for a few moments. "That uh.. kiss.." He started. "It was nice.." He lowered his voice. 

"Yeah, it was." I smiled to myself.

"Hey uh.. Devon?" He asked.

"Yeah?" I looked over the car at his smiley self. 

"Will you be my girlfriend?" He looked over at me.

"Sure, why not." I walked over to him to look at his equations, then kissed him on the cheek. I looked over them for a bit until I heard Klaus in the distance. Five was too focused on his equations to notice. I just stared as Klaus yelled and ran towards us. 

"Five! Five! Start the car, would ya?" Klaus yelled as he ran. I poked Five and snapped him out of his thoughts. "Oh my... shit, shit, shit! Five! Start the car! Five! Start the car! Hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry!" 

I ran to the backseat and Five ran to the driver's seat.

"Why can't you just get along with people?" Five yelled in frustration at him.

"I tried. Really, I did. I tried!" Klaus screeched.

"Wait, wait, wait!" An Amish woman stopped him, handing him a book. 

"Klaus, it's now or never! Klaus!"

"Go, go!" I shouted.

"This whole timeline's chock-full of riddles. Get this. My mom died here before I was even born!"

"What did you just say?" Five said after slamming on the brakes. I hit my head so I was rubbing it in pain.