"Are you sure she's mentally ready come home." Fiona asked the physiatrist
"Yeah she passed all of her tests." She replied bluntly before walking away
"I hate these fucking doctors." Fiona groaned as she walked back in the room "Can you stand up Ror, we gotta get you to the car."
"If not i can always pick you up." Jimmy smiled at me
"I will be okay, i've got to get used to it."
It has been 2 weeks since my expected realse date , i ended up having multiple panic attacks so i had to stay in longer. All i could think about is how shitty it was that the attempt wasn't successful maybe that was selfish after all the pain i have put my family in
We finally got home, a home i haven't been at for 2 months without realising. Me and Carl haven't said a word to eachothers and we both know it is a lot better this way.
One way or another, one of us will get hurt. I cannot handle this right now, not after everything that has happened.
I also found out that Ian is off his medication and has been since my traumatic event. I just remember him holding me begging me not to go, i feel so guilty now.
He really isn't doing well, he isn't sleeping for days on end or sleeping way to much. It is breaking Mickeys heart seeing him like it.
He had lost his 2 favourite people in the space of a few hours, he must of felt like a ghost.
"Come on Rory you have been standing outside the house for 5 minutes, just staring." Carl walked over to me
"Fuck you." I snapped as i continued to stare at the house, i couldn't go in not after what had happened
"Come on Ror let's go." Ian held out his hand as i took it, he dragged me inside
As soon as i stepped in i seen the exact moment all over again
"Hey family." Lip shouted
"It's okay i can go now." Rory smiled at Ian, as Lip ran into the kitchen with horror all over his face
"No way, Fuck off."Lip tried to grasp what was happening, but he couldn't believe that Rory was dying infront of him
"DO SOMETHING." Mickey screamed as Rory blacked out once again, but this time she stopped breathing
—
"She is sobbing, how do we get her out of this." Mickey panicked, waving his hand in my face
"Fuck would i know." Fiona tried to shake me awake "I knew she wasn't ready to come home."
"RORY." Mickey shouted as i finally broke out of it
I looked up at him, unable to form a sentence "I'm sorry."
"What for?" Debbie asked confused
"I still wish that attempt would of been successful." I sighed
The looks of horror over there faces, made me feel so guilty. Guilty that i honestly would rather be dead then be here with my family.
"Why though?" Carl said stupidly
"I don't fucking know, i just hate it here." I raised my voice "Your a prick Carl."
"Rory come back." Fiona told me as i walked up the stairs
"I'm going to see if i still have my job." I shouted, grabbing my coat and walking out the door
"Ror you to weak to go out." Ian told me from outside the window "It's cold come back in."
"For fuck sake ian, leave me alone."
"Fine freeze for all i care." He snapped
~~~
I walked into the coffee shop i worked at 2 months ago, Fiona had told them what happened.
"Hey Martha." I waved to my boss
"Hey Rory, how you feeling?" She smiled, giving me a hug
"Better then i was, i was just wondering when can i start back."
"Hasn't Fiona told you?" She frowned at me
"Told me what?" I knew what was coming after this besides i was away for 2 months
"We can't have someone with scars all over there arms and legs. It's a saftey policy."
Not what i expected
"Please tell me your joking, i did it way before my attempt Martha." I began to raise my voice "You know what fuck you, it was shitty pay anyways."
I stormed out as i ran straight back to the Gallagher house in tears.
I noticed once i walked through the front door that nobody was there. After everything that happened i shouldn't want to pick up that blade again, but everything was tö overwhelming.
I ran the blade across my skin a few times, it hurt a lot more then it did before. I quickly wiped the blood and pulled my sleeves down.
As i walked out the door Mickey was stood there "Oh rory."
"It's nothing." I quickly replied
"Nothing?" He laughed "You have only just got out, your doing it again aren't you?"
"NO." I shouted back at him
"You need help."
"No it was just 1 more time." I turned to him
"But that's a lie isn't it, you can't fight the urges to stop." Mickey was now following me around the house "You did it 2 months ago. This is serious, you have to stop."
"I'm trying, but i can't keep pretending like everything's normal. This morning just after i got out the hospital i went on a walk, and all i could think about what how much i hated my life." I continued "And school work piling up and i've just lost my job because of something i can't control. Having everyone shout at me for something i can't help."
"We need to get you help Ror." He said again "I will try to find you a new job to do. I'm so sorry."
He held me tight as i sobbed in his arms "They won't accept me Mick. I passed all my tests, it will take months to get a refferal."
"Then we hide everything intill we get you that refferal." He smiled holding my face "We can get through this."
"I love you mick."
"Fuck you milkovich." He replied kissing my forehead
"Mickey, Ian's throwing up." Debbie shouted from upstairs
"For fuck sake." He muttered as he ran up the stairs
"Ian you need to start eating, this is why your throwing up." Mickey told him as he picked him up "Come here."
"I just want to sleep." He replied collapsing into Mickeys arms
"You need your pills."
"Leave me alone." He said walking back into the bedroom
"He is the one you need to worry about."
YOU ARE READING
PROMISES - LIES - REGRETS
FanfictionRory Milkovich is the youngest Milkovich in the family. She is 14 years old and completely different to her siblings. She practically lives with the Gallagher family since her dad abused her since she was very young, causing her to even get pregnan...
