The Healing Project

Ice-cream, gelato, мороженое

You know,
Healing isn't just about reflecting
On the actions of the past,
And the consequences it has now.

The aim, yes,
Is reflection,
Giving closure,
And making peace.

But it's also about happiness.
So I'm not going to focus
Only on the negative feelings.
I'm going to write about the positive as well.

I helped a girl today,
By translating ice-cream flavors
From Italian to English.
And it made me feel better.

English is my mother tongue.
Yes, my parents are Italian,
But I grew up mainly speaking it
Because of where we lived.

Now that we've moved back to Italy,
My English is going quite unused
And it makes me really sad,
Like I'm not using a crucial part of me.

So being able to use my English,
Also to help someone else out,
Really made me feel good.

You speak English extremely well
(Although sometimes you didn't
Believe me when I'd say it).

It helped enormously
That you let me speak my native language,
And you were able to easily respond.
I'm not really myself without my English.

I don't think I ever could have
Really gotten properly close to you
If you didn't speak English well.

English is more meaningful to me.
I can express myself truly through it,
And anything said in English
Resonates with me better.

You always spoke to me in English
Even with the serious things,
And that, to me,
Made us more serious than ever.

Because "ti amo" seems more
Romantic or fancy to non-Italian speakers usually,
But I much preferred to hear you say it in English.
To know you put effort into my comfort.

I wanted to learn your language too.
I loved hearing your Russian,
Listening to the sounds
Even though I didn't know the meaning.

I remember the sound of
"I love you" in Russian.
You said it to me twice.

I actually tried learning the language.
Started one of those Duolingo courses.
I loved the alphabet and shape of the letters,
And spent hours trying to get the sounds right.

I've always had a fascination
For foreign languages and people.
Serbian, Slovakian, Latvian, Spanish,
I knew some basics in those.

But I was really studying Russian,
Because you love your grandma,
And I wanted to speak the language
That you both shared.

That course is abandoned now.
I might pick it up again one day,
Who knows.
I did really like the language.