Daylight

6

Oh, I love it and I hate it at the same time

Hidin' all of our sins from the daylight

Stepping off the bus I see Teresa running towards me as she does every morning "Morning y/n" she wraps an arm around my neck pulling me into a hug causing my head to start throbbing "Too rough T" I say freeing myself from her grasp, we push past the year 7's in front of us rolling down our skirts as we enter the school. "You alright y/n? you look rough" Teresa asks rolling her skirt back up, "Um, yeah I'm just little hungover" I whisper as we walk into form, other than a few randoms and the form teacher we're the first there, we make our way to the back to take our seats. "So, care to tell me why you're hungover on a Tuesday?" Teresa turned to me, "Cus I was drunk last night" I reply sarcastically, she gives me a look as if to say 'very funny' "Plus why I was drinking isn't whats relevant, I've got stuff to tell you about what happened while I was drinking" Teresa's face lights "Spill now."

The classroom door open, Thomas and Minho walk in followed by Newt, we lock eyes for a split second before Teresa shakes my shoulder "Y/n? tell me" I look back to her "I'll tell you at break I can't right now" she looks over my shoulder "Oh my fuck it's about Newt, isn't it? That's why he's staring at you" she squeals "He what?" I spin around, looking directly at Newt, our eyes lock again before he turns back to his friends, I look back at Teresa "What a freak" I mutter "Yeah but you still kissed him" Teresa looks at me and the look of regret on my face "What did you do y/n?" "Twice" I mumble "What?" she moves closer to me "I kissed him twice" she leans back, looks over my shoulder, then back at me, over my shoulder, back at me. "You fucking idiot y/n" she slaps my head causing my headache to worsen "Ow T, what the fuck was that for" I say raising my hand to my head "Don't make me say it y/n, I thought you hated him" "I do hate him." The bell starts to ring, "Clearly" Teresa says picking up her bag, "tell me everything at break ok" she says walking off to her lesson, I nod back, turning and walking away from her.

After an hour of English, followed by another hour of physics, I was already exhausted, picking up my bag I left the science, walking straight into Fry in my hurry. "Shit sorry, y/n?" he faces me "Oh hey Fry, you good?" I say pulling my bag strap back over my shoulder, "Yeah I was just finding somewhere to eat" he says as we start walking towards the canteen "You can sit with Teresa and me if you want?" I offer as we turn towards the canteen exit, "You sure? Teresa won't mind?" "What won't I mean?" Teresa emerges from the doorway, bacon roll in her hand. "T this is Fry, he's cool to sit with us?" we start walking towards our table by the lockers, "Yeah he's cool, just as long as you tell me everything that happened last night" she says squeezing herself in the small gap between the table and bench. "What happened last night?" Fry asks sitting next to her, I let out a sigh and begin to explain the situation to Fry.

"The guy I was telling you about on the balcony" Fry nods "Well after you left, he kinda showed up and kinda, sorta started kissing me" a look of shock crosses his face "And you told him to stop right?" silence. "Right y/n?" I keep my gaze on the table "No, I kinda kissed him back" I admit quietly. "Why the fuck would you do that" "I know right" Teresa interrupts, mouth full of bread "Look at her fucking neck" she leans over pulling down my shirt collar "You said you hated him" Fry says as Teresa lets go of my shirt "I do, but... I don't know ok it just felt right when I was drunk" they both look at me like I'm crazy "Anyway" I carry on "Last night I was bored and my parents weren't home so I decide to drink a bit and kinda ended up getting drunk" I say, lying about the real reason for my actions, Teresa scoffs "Should've invited me" I roll my eyes "And then there was this knock on my window and it was Newt" "Why was he at your house?" Fry asks "How does he even know where you live?" Teresa adds "I don't know he was high and he was saying how he couldn't go home cus of his sister" "And he couldn't have gone to Thomas's or Minho's?" Teresa asks. I think back to what he said, what he told me, what I promised him, but I hate him I don't have to keep his secret. He kept mine though. "I don't know he didn't say" I reply "Next thing I knew he'd pinned me to my bed and was kissing me." "And you let him?" Fry exclaimed "Yes" I say weakly.

The bell rings, calling us back to lessons "Ugh no fun" Teresa sighs "What do you guys have?" "Textiles" I respond "I've got Spanish" Fry says "I've got French we can walk together" Teresa smiles. "I'll see you guys at lunch" I wave back at them as we go off in opposite directions.

Entering the classroom, I see Alby in the corner by himself, he's the only guy who picked textiles and gets so much shit for it from his mates but he's genuinely one of the loveliest people I know. Apart from the fact that he's besties with Newt, he even made him vice president of the year which sucks. "Hey Alby" I call over to him, he looks up for half a second and nods back to me before going straight back to his sewing. I place my bag at my seat before grabbing my sketchbook and fabric bag from the cupboard.  My half-finished dress is pinned to the mannequin behind me, carefully I lift it down and put it on the floor, it's a pale pink dress with a corset bodice and full circle skirt, at least it's meant to be. The corset is too loose and doesn't fit properly and the skirts not even hemmed yet. I grab a machine and get to work.

The clock turns to eleven thirty two, I put my skirt down and walk up to the teacher's desk. "Miss" she turns to me "Can I please go to the toilet?" "Yes, go ahead" she replies, I turn around and walk out of the classroom and make my way down the hall towards the stairs. The door creaks open as I walk into the secluded space, I start walking down the steps hearing someone below me climbing up them.

Turning the corner, I almost walk into the other person "Sorry" I mumble trying to move out of their way. "Y/n can we talk?"  I take my eyes off of the floor and look at the person in front of me, "What now Newt?" he takes a step up to the one I'm standing on "Listen about last night" he begins "It's fine let's just not talk about it ok?" I interrupt him "No, y/n it can't happen again got it? I hate you and you hate me, I don't need people knowing I kissed you let alone it happening multiple times" he says angrily "Do you think I want people knowing either? Maybe next time don't climb through my fucking window and start making out with me. I get it, you weren't doing well but if you don't want it happening again then don't start it" I snap back "I was high and depressed sorry if I wasn't thinking straight, if you didn't want me there why the fuck did you let me in?" he takes a step towards me causing me to take one back "Like you said, you were high and depressed, sorry I didn't want you to kill yourself maybe next time I'll just let you. I'm sure Lizzy would love that wouldn't she? Or maybe she'd enjoy finding out her brother gets high and sneaks into people's rooms so he doesn't start slitting his fucking wrists" his face falls, I took it too far "You know, I was beginning to forget why I hated you, thanks for reminding me" he shoves past me and walks up the stairs.

"Y/n" I turn around looking up at him "I hope when you cut yourself tonight it makes you feel better, or maybe do us all a favour and jump off a bridge because nothing will ever fix you or the problems you cause by just existing" he spat turning around and walking out of the door leaving me alone on the stairs.