Crimson [Completed]

Nori 'y Presa 36

Chapter 36

I am now looking for a dress na aakma sa kung anong meron. I want to wear a black dress tonight. I am not ready yet to see her inside her coffin , maging sa ngayon ay hindi ko parin tanggap na wala na pala talaga siya.

Yes, they say I should accept her death for her to rest in peace but how can I accept it kung ako mismo hindi ko malaman kung mag kakaroon ba ako ng peace knowing that she's gone.

This is my first heart break and it's not just a simple pain. It's like my world turns upside down because of mixed emotions and confusion.

Dahil kung ano man ang ipinaramdam saakin ni Noris last week, ramdam kong totoo iyon, call me crazy I don't care. Basta ang alam ko it was real, my love for her is real kahit pa never ko siyang nakita in person with flesh and blood.

"Presa? Tara na". My mom called me and I immediately grabbed my purse. Hindi na ako nag make up pa masyado dahil alam kong iiyak lang ako.

May nag hihintay na yate sa pampang at doon kami ulit sasakay. My parents decided to get home early kanina at sumunod lang ako. Kagagaling ko lang sa hospital, nagalit saakin si mama and dad but this time ayaw kong sumunod. 

I am mourning, at takang taka ang mga magulang ko kung bakit ganito ang ikinikilos ko, lalo na si dad na walang alam sa connection namin ni Noris.

I told mom about our little moments and she's fine with that, but she feels sorry about her death. Ganyan daw talaga, depression can kill, depression is a serious problem that people should know. 

Habang papalapit ng papalapit ang yate sa isla ay nag babadya nang tumulo ang mga luha ko. Dapat nga ay nasa acceptance stage na ako but I can't. 

Ricky also told me that his sister's body is still intact. Hindi pa ito nag liquified because of the embalming process. Medyo natuwa sila dahil makikita pa nila ang buong katawan niya.

At masaya din ako dahil buo pa siyang makikita ko. But I am afraid to even look at her face. Takot ako na baka hindi ko na maiwan ang lugar kung saan siya nakahiga.

My love for her is too powerful, I want to embrace and kiss her dead body but I know they would not let me.  

"Careful sweetheart". My father said and he hold my hand.

Nauna nang nag lakad papasok sila mama at ang kasama niya, habang kami ni dad ay nag lalakad ng dahan dahan. Sumasabay siya saakin, alam kong ramdam niya na hesitant akong pumasok sa loob.

"Why are you so affected with the death of your fiance's sister honey?". He asked me. Natigil ako sa pag lalakad.

"He's still not my fiance dad". I whispered.

"Answer my question anak. I never want to see you like this, your eyes are telling me you're tired and you're in a deep sadness. You know I am here". He said while caressing my face.

"I'm fine dad. His sister is very special to me. We had a great connection and the world connected me to her".  Pahayag ko.

"So you're friends with Noris Majed? I remember her honey. She was the girl who was lucky enough to accept the little girl's heart". Kumunot ang noo ko. I faced dad and I am so eager to listen to him.

"What do you mean dad?". I asked him seriously.

"Remember your invisible friend, Charlie?". He asked and I suddenly remembered my best friend, the one who died a year ago when I was a little at naging kaibigan ko ang ghost niya. 

"She's the reason why Noris Majed survived. But I am sad that she just wasted the life that the little Charlie gave her.". My heartbeat became abnormal because of what he just revealed. 

"Charlie and I save her life, Charlie gave her another chance to live but she just throw it away by killing herself because of depression. Depression is really a serious case. And I pity her for not having the support she needs from her family.".  He looked at me and he wiped my tears.

"Now tell me why are you like this? You looked miserable?". He asked. I shook my head.

"It happened again dad, but with Noris Majed. I spend my three days with her, believing that she's real, with flesh and blood. It hurts me to know that I was just enjoying the ghost of her. And you just told me that she has Charlie's heart. It pains me more dad". I cried.

"The reason why Ricky's parents and I are close. I saved their daughter from death at an early age". He whispered. 

I close my eyes and think for a second.

After mag sink in lahat sa isip ko ay mas lalo akong nasasaktan. Pumasok kami ng sabay ni dad sa loob ng funeral house, at habang nag lalakad papalapit sa kabaong ay agad akong napaupo.

My dad immediately hold me and he supports my weight. Tinulungan niya akong makalapit kung nasaan si Noris. 

When I see her face napapikit nalang ako ng madiin because of so much hurt inside my chest. How can she be like this! 

"Noris! Noris naman oh! Parang awa mo na. Gisingin mo na ako kung panaginip lang ang lahat ng ito. Because look at me babe, I am in so much pain". Bulong ko habang nakayuko sa glass ng coffin.

Nag bago ng kunti ang shape ng mukha niya but she's still handsome. Her tattoos are visible, lalo na ang dragonfly sa leeg niya mismo. 

I want to touch her face, her nose, her lips and her cheeks. I want to embrace her so much. 

"Noris please love. Wake up. Wake me up from this nightmare. Please tell me you love me. I miss your voice so much". Bulong ko.

I was trying my best na hindi mapatakan ng luha ang kabaong niya. Masama daw iyon.

Naramdaman ko nalang na mayroong yumakap saakin mula sa likod, and It's her mother, sa gilid ay si Ricky.

Alam kong confused pa si Ricky kung bakit ako sobrang affected sa pagkawala ng kapatid niya pero maiintindihan din niya sa huli. 

"We have to let her go Iha."  Bulong ng mama niya. Umiling ako at patuloy na umiiyak. 

"Please. Dalawin mo akong muli at nais kong sabihin mo ang lahat ng nararamdaman mo. I will wait for you Noris. Palagi kitang aabangan. Mag pakita kanang muli". Daing ko. 

Pinapatahan ako nila mama pero hindi ko talaga mapigilan. Tomorrow is her burial, at mas lalo akong napang hihinaan dahil tuluyan na siyang mawawala saakin bukas.

It hurts.