When the Ash Fades (Fortalejo Series #2)

Chapter 23

Deserving

"Kyer, bumalik na tayo roon. Our families are waiting for us." Tanging nasabi ko matapos ang ilang sandaling nakabibinging katahimikan.

He didn't respond. I tried to remove his arms around me but it only tightened. Napasinghap ako, nalilito na sa kung anong dapat na gawin. Sa huli ay tumigil ako at hinayaan na lang muna ang sarili. Napayuko ako habang kinakagat ang labi. I watched my hands on his veiny arms. My long fingers with bare nails looked odd now that they're resting on his skin.

"I missed you," I can feel his hot breath near my neck. I couldn't help but let out a small sigh. Hindi ko kasi alam kung anong dapat na sabihin ko. "A lot."

I cleared my throat. Ramdam ko kasi ang panunuyo ng lalamunan ko dahil sa sinabi niya. Hindi ko alam kung maniniwala ba ako o ano. Hindi niya ako pinahanap. He confirmed it earlier. But then, he also told me that his words a while ago are only lies. Kasama kaya iyon doon?

"Those three years have been the hardest years of my life. You left me. I tried to find you but your father is hiding you. He gave me the wrong leads. Huli na nang malaman kong inililigaw niya ang paghahanap ko sa iyo. Nagkaroon ng problema sa pamilya ko kaya hindi ko na napagtuonan ng pansin ang paghahanap sa'yo. My cousin was almost killed at his own wedding. There's a threat to our family and that time... I need to be there for them a hundred percent."

My lips parted for words. Pero sa huli ay itinikom ko lang din ito dahil wala akong mahagilap na salita. Hindi ko alam na may nangyaring ganoon. At muntik nang mamatay ang pinsan niya sa araw mismo ng kasal nito? Sinong pinsan niya kaya?

"Is... your cousin okay now?" Maingat na tanong ko.

Bahagya niya akong niyugyog. He murmured something I didn't hear. Pumihit ako para magkaharap kami at sinalubong ako ng mga mata niyang may bahid ng pagtatampo. It was as if my question offended him.

"Bakit parang mas concern ka pa sa pinsan ko kaysa sa akin?" Ramdam ko ang hinanakit sa tanong niya.

I wanted to immediately deny his accusation but there's something that caught my curiosity.

"Bakit? Did something happen to you too at his wedding?" Medyo naalarma ako. Ang isiping ganoon nga ay nagbigay ng kirot sa puso ko. I couldn't imagine it. The mighty Kyer Fortalejo hurt and fighting for his own life? It will wreck me for sure.

"Kailangan ko pa bang mabaril para mag-alala ka rin sa akin—"

"Kyer!" saway ko sa kanya. I don't want to hear it. Damn.

He sighed and looked away. "Yovin is okay now."

Muli niya akong niyakap. He crouched and buried his face on my nape. Halos magtago siya roon. At hindi ko maintindihan kung bakit hinahayaan ko siya. Hindi naging kami noon. At wala rin kaming relasyon ngayon. Kaya... bakit ganito?

"Kyer, hindi pa ba tayo babalik?"

Naramdaman ko ang pag-iling niya. "Dito lang muna tayo, please? Let's talk more. I want you close to me like this. I want to hear your voice more."

Natigilan ako. Bakit pakiramdam ko ay natatakot siya na umalis na naman ako?

"I'm not going anywhere..." I said.

"Of course. Hindi na ako papayag."

Napairap ako. "What I mean is, pwedi naman tayong bumalik na roon. Hindi naman ako uuwi kaagad. I will wait until the dinner is finished. And, right, Apollo told me that there's a welcome party for me?"

Kyer snorted. "Apollo is just creating stories. Dinner lang ipinahanda ko—"

"But he told me na meron!"