During the week Elda had spent in Sweden she had finished and recorded a song collab, performed at a festival (where she met a really sweet girl who made Elda sign her tote bag) and done many interviews with countless interviewers asking about Jan and her life outside of Sweden. Her answer had been mostly true as she said she preferred to live where no one recognised her, yet she could still continue her Swedish career. She simply left out the part about never being able to leave Jan, never wanting to be away from him for too long.
As she got back to Jan, where he now was in London, someone she didn't expect reached out though. It was Ivy. And it wasn't that weird per se that she had reached out, they were still friendly with each other even if they weren't as close as before. What was weird was what she had wrote in her text. "Do you ever miss us?" It read. And that was not a conversation Elda wanted to have through text, it left too many opportunities for misunderstanding. So, the next day before they first lesson Elda pulled Ivy from the classroom to a more secluded place to try to talk to her.
"I think we need to talk" Elda said, trying to approach her carefully. She had trouble interpreting the expression on Ivy's face, but it seemed to at least convey emotions of desire, cautiousness and some guilt as well. Ivy seemed to go over some thoughts in her head before she finally spoke up. "I have a feeling we want to talk about different things" she finally said, in a weak tone Elda had never heard her use before. "But I need to tell you how I feel no matter what you have to say, is that alright?" she said with a bit more confidence, sounding more like herself. Elda simply nodded softly as an answer.
"You're something special Elda. I wasn't toying around with you like I know I've done with other people, what I felt for you was real. It is still true. You can't deny that we weren't something special." Ivy said, engaged in her opinion. This particular thing was hard for Elda to hear, because she could deny it, she was doing it in fact. Elda knew she had to tell Ivy that, and she knew it would hurt her.
"Ivy" she started slowly, taking a breath to prepare for what she had to say. "You know I would never wish to hurt you, and you are special to me, I won't deny that, but it has never been in any romantic way." A look of irritation crossed Ivy's face at that statement. "Don't deny what you felt just because you for some reason regret it now Elda, will you please tell me I wasn't hallucinating" she said exasperated. Elda looked at Ivy with pity in her eyes before she uttered her response. "I can't do that Ivy" she said quietly, the pity in her eyes being conveyed in her voice as well. "I'm sorry to admit I never had any feelings for you, they were always strictly platonic. Perhaps sexual at some point but never romantic. You must have seen that Ivy". She continued. Ivy's face twisted but she stayed silent for a moment. "Stop that" Ivy said quickly in a quiet voice. "Don't do that to me."
"Ivy, I had a great time with you, and I did enjoy it, but I was forcing something that weren't meant to be. I won't go back to something like that." She said, starting to get a bit annoyed at Ivy's constant insistent behaviour.
"So, what about us then? You'll just forget and deny what we had?" Ivy said, getting annoyed as well. They could both feel an argument incoming, and although none of them wanted it they didn't try to stop it coming either. "There is no us anymore Ivy, you're you and I'm me. And I thought we already agreed we could stay friends, that we weren't meant to be more."
"You're the one who said that Elda, I simply agreed because I didn't know what to do at the time."
Det finns en plats som ingen annan har
Tomrummet som blivit kvar
Jag kan inte fylla de än
Nej för jag minns i varje andetag
Stunderna som du och jag
Aldrig kommer dela igen
(There's a place that no one else has
the empty space that's left
I can't fill it yet
No, because I remember in every breath
The moments you and I
Will never share again)
YOU ARE READING
You put me on fire || Jan. R. (Discontinued)
Fanfiction"The polish representant for this year's Eurovision will be...Three, two, one...BLANKA" And right there, at that moment, was where Elda's anger became too big to control and the thought of her actions having consequences didn't even cross her mind a...
