My Heart Bleeds Blue (Eremin)

9

"Hey, Armin?" Eren asked as they walked through the hospital doors. "I'm so glad I found you." He finished, stopping the chair on the crosswalk to give his lover a hug from behind. "While I love your hugs, can we move out of the way of traffic?" Armin said looking to his right seeing cars waiting on them to move. Eren took the hint, or more of the direction, and they finished crossing the road. 

Once at the car Armin got out of his chair and sat himself in the passenger seat of their shared Honda Civic. Eren went to put the wheelchair back inside, walking through the maze of a parking deck and back into the smell of antiseptic. He reached the return and read over, for the last time, My Heart Bleeds Blue. The brunette started walking back to the car and immediately knew which one was his from the lyrics escaping the open passenger seat window 'No one can leave once they merge.' Since the release of the new Melanie album, it's all the pair have been listening too. Eren opened the car door and put it in reverse, backing from their spot and entering the highway. With their newfound happiness and sense of accomplishment, they rode with all the windows down and radio on full blast, Singing along to their shared playlist. "Eren this is the happiest I've felt in a long time, thank you for this!" Armin had to scream over the music so his partner could hear. "I'm glad, love!" Eren screamed back looking at Armins beautifully shaped face, now with color, before turning back to the road and pure terror settling onto his features. 

A drunk driver on the wrong side of the road, barreling towards them, Eren swerved the car in a futile attempt to avoid the car, but only placing himself in the line of impact. 

Bang. 

-----

The car hardly looked like a car when Armin awoke from unconsciousness. Eren, please God, anyone, let him be ok. Armin pulled himself from the rubble of their car stumbling around until he saw Eren.  About fifty feet or so from the wreck, lied an unconscious and bleeding figure, too mangled to see the face, but he knew it was Eren. Examining his wounds and holding pressure on the major ones, He called nine-one-one. "Nine-one-one, what's your emergency" the operator spoke in an unenthusiastic voice. "Yes, I'm on the highway a mile or so out of Concord. My boyfriend and I have been in a wreck and he's bleeding badly, please send an ambulance." Armin replied, you could feel him shaking through the phone, "Yes sir, they're on their way right now, about seven minutes out. Can you describe his injuries?" Armin set his phone on the blood-soaked pavement, and said "Femoral fracture, looks like some broken ribs, bleeding from the chest, face and arms, and my guess is internal bleeding." "Alright, can you check his eyes, see if they're responsive." Armin waved his phone flashlight over Eren's bright green eyes, looking for any sign of cognitive function. Nothing. He didn't have time to cry or mourn, right now he had to hope, hope his brain function would come back. Ambulance sirens blessed his ears, as he flagged them down. A man stepped out of the vehicle and ran over to where they were. "Sir, I'm going to need you to leave, we've got it from here." A bald man said pushing past him to get to Eren. A woman with a high ponytail, finished her snack and ran from the back of the ambulance with a stretcher.

Why? Why couldn't they have one nice thing. Why did it have to be him, WHY God damn it! Hot tears rushed down Armins face, as he watched his lover be loaded onto the gurney and rushed to the ambulance. The woman with the ponytail approached slowly, like a person trying to pet a stray cat, scared it would run. She introduced herself as 'Sasha' and she asked him to get into the ambulance so they could bring the pair to the hospital. 

On the way back to the dreaded place, Questions were asked, not the get to know you kind, but the macabre ones. "This is going to be a lot, but please answer to the best of your ability." She paused and swallowed a lump in her throat. "Do you know his blood type?" Armin, responded in a weak voice, "B positive." "Thats great, thank you and how old he is?" "Twenty-nine." "And this one's the hard one," she placed her hand on his and spoke the last words anyone would want to hear about their loved one. 

"Is he an organ donor?" 

Armins face went pale, tears streaming down his cheeks, "Yes."

-----

"What do we have!" A familiar voice called, only for tears to fall out of her brown doe-like eyes. The doors to the ambulance opened to reveal an emotionless Armin and a man, too bruised and covered in blood to recognize.  She rushed to his side to see his wounds, and how severe they were. "Alright, take him to trauma three." Hange said lowering the gurney from the ambulance. They pushed him through the door and into his designated room. Armin tried to enter but was shut out, leaving him to slide down the wall onto the floor. He could hear shouts from inside, and the smell of hospital level alcohol overpowered whatever thought could enter his mind.

 About half an hour passed, the nurses left the room and Hange called Armin and Mikasa in, given they were the closest thing to family he had. "I'm so sorry." Hange's voice cracked and she physically strained to stop herself from crying. After she calmed herself, she looked at the two and spoke. "He's technically alive, but... He isn't." Armin and Mikasa looked confused, so Hange clarified. "Erens, braindead." The last part made her erupt into tears, soon followed by Armin and Mikasa.  Armin dropped to his knees, held Erens road-rashed hand and cried into it for what seemed like hours. Mikasa stayed standing, no emotion on her face only small tears rolling down her cheeks, eventually being caught by her scarf. "I understand this is a tough time, but he is an organ donor, correct." Asked Hange. "Yes, how long do we have... Before you have to take him?" Mikasa questioned because Armin was too hysterical to form any kind of word. "I would have to take him now, so say your goodbyes." She hated saying those words to families, it was the worst part about working in trauma, giving what she was trying to prevent, to others. 

Mikasa and Hange exited the room, to give Armin the first turn at 'goodbye.' The blonde stood up and held both of Erens hands in his own. He leaned down and gave a quick kiss to the lifeless lips on the table. "It should have been me. I was already going to die eventually, and I wouldn't have created anything meaningful. You, you would have given the world the gift of passion, love, courage, and well, a pretty face to look at." Armin laughed and rubbed the tears from his eyes. "I love you, Eren Jaeger, I always have and always will, I know you're waiting for me on the other side, so I'll wait for you on this side too. They're going to give a piece of you to multiple different people, so at least a sliver of you is still alive." Armin took a deep breath and looked at Erens peacefully resting eyes, and uttered "Goodbye, Eren." With that Armin left the room and Mikasa entered.

Once in the room Mikasa stared at Eren, tears falling rapidly, but still no emotion. Questioning what to say she couldn't muster up anything deeper than "Goodbye, Eren." That was it, she left and Hange, along with a few transplant surgeons came back in to harvest his organs.

There was nothing, nothing worth doing or living for anymore, the apartment was lost, the car totaled, and his hope for humanity in rubble. Armin Arlet was lost, for the first time since he found Eren, he didn't know what to do with himself. He was stranded in the forest without any direction on where to go. 

A/N love me a plot twist, anyway I cried writing this so someone else could cry reading this. The next chapter will be the last, the after that I'll write an epilogue. Sad to see my spring break project end but, I'm glad I created something decent and rekindled my love for writing. 

word count: 1441