Naruto Oneshots + Imagines

Stupid (Kakashi Hatake x Anko Mitarashi)

~

On top of being stupid, Kakashi Hatake is also busy. Too busy. Unlike most of the Jonin in the village who take weeks off after going on a long mission, Kakashi insists on keeping himself busy. It's odd to her that such a lackadaisical man can't seem to sit still; to find someone to settle down with, to build a family, to live a normal life. Perhaps it's from being on that strict Anbu regimen for so long, or perhaps he's just trying to run from his problems like she does.

Anko doesn't understand it. She has people who want her, sure. There are some crazy ninja in the village who stare at her with unmistakable lust in their eyes, who want to land her in bed for the sake of being able to say they fucked the crazy snake lady. But none of them love her. Anko doesn't have any living family, or really any friends aside from Shizune and Ibiki, both of whom she keeps at a comfortable distance. Kakashi, on the other hand, has plenty of people who love him; his three students, Lady Tsunade, Jiraiya, and his many close friends and admirers. Kakashi has everything that Anko wants and he squanders it by risking his life more often than he needs to and refusing to spend enough time with those who love him.

Anko finds herself uneasy when Kakashi is out of town for A-Rank missions, which is all the time now that all of his students are being trained by the legendary Sannin. So, thanks to the friend-killing bastard, she's uneasy all the time . Part of her wants the opportunity to beat the shit out of him for making her feel this way. The other part of her wants nothing more than to kiss away the problems he's so obviously running from by overworking himself.

A terrible habit that Anko has developed is sitting atop the tree branches just outside of the village gates to watch for the other Jonin when she hears he's supposed to return soon. It's five in the morning, far too early for her to be up. Neither of the Chunin at the gate have noticed her- a tad embarrassing and concerning considering that they're the village's first defense against anyone trying to come in. Then again, if she were them, she wouldn't expect her to be up there waiting for Kakashi either.

Eventually, she sees Kakashi start to come through. The older Jonin's silver hair is crusted in blood that Anko isn't sure whose it is, his uniform is all sorts of torn, and his empty backpack is almost completely shredded, barely hanging onto his back by a single strap. The way he walks is weird, too, and that's when the realization hits her.

Kakashi has been poisoned. That explains the lethargic, stumbly way he puts one foot in front of the other along with the far-off look in his eye. He suddenly sits on the dirt ground and stares up at the trees.

"Waiting for me to come home again, hm, Anko?" At that, Anko jumps down from her hiding spot. It doesn't surprise her that Kakashi already knew, though she does wonder why he hasn't said anything until now. Anko rushes to sit next to Kakashi and inspect his body to see where the poison was forced in. They're just far enough from the village gates that neither Kotetsu nor Izumo see them. "You know, it's too early to be out. Why not sleep if you have the day off?"

"Idiot, you're hurt!" Anko exclaims with a red face as she finds what she suspects to be the cut that Kakashi's enemy dealt to poison him. It's a gash on his palm that appears to be from blocking a kunai. "The hell were you thinking coming back to the village without contacting a medical nin first if you knew you were poisoned? Don't tell me they actually sent you alone!"

"Heh, I knew you'd be here for me..." Kakashi, clearly out of it, laughs. Then, he offers Anko his hand. "You always are."

Kakashi is a fool who doesn't mind throwing his life away for the sake of the village. Anko is no better, but it's something she hates about Kakashi, as she hates it about herself, too. Just another quality for the list of reasons she doesn't love Kakashi Hatake.