Fly Away - a fighter pilot story

Chapter 28 - Survivor

"It has come to my attention that you are flying again.", I hear a familiar neutral voice behind me. Why now? Why on fucking earth does he think just because he is here, he could talk to me? I don't turn around to my father and keep looking into the dark.

Currently I am standing outside the huge white tent in which the reception is held, because I needed some air. Seeing everyone in there laughing, dancing and enjoying themselves made me miss my friends. Would my own weeding with Liam have been similar to it? Not the venue or the guests, but the easiness of it. Celebrating two people who love each other and promise to do so until death would part them.

"And I heard that you impressed Lt. Colonel Colton. I could put in a good word for you, if you really want to join the Thunderbirds.", he continues after a few moments when I don't say anything to him.

Involuntarily my head snaps where he is now standing right beside me. He looks up to the stars. His face is dimly lit, but I can see a slight smile on his lips for the first time in years. My father has always been composed. Rarely he showed his emotions.

"I don't need your help nor anymore interference from your part in my career. If I want to become a member of that squadron, I can achieve that on my own.", I hiss at him.

I don't exactly know what it is, that makes my blood boil every single time I see him. Maybe it is his neglect. His neglect of taking care of me when I was younger. His neglect when my mother died and he didn't show up to her funeral, even though she was his wife. His neglect of showing any kind of emotion.

"Not everything is as it seems. You should have learned that by now.", my father says, and I hear him taking a deep breath. Does he really dare to insult me right now? I want to turn away and go inside, but he stops me by grabbing my wrist.

"We should have had the conversation ahead of us sooner.", he tells me and looks me right in the eyes. Even in the dim light I see determination in them.

"I don't think that there will be any conversation between the two of us. Everything out of your mouth is just a lie. Didn't I express myself well enough back then when I told you that I didn't want you in my life?", I ask him as I turn to him. Sighing, he lets go of my wrist. I instantly pull my arm to my chest.

"I know you hate me for many things that you think I have done. I know that you think that I constantly interfere with your career and your life. But the truth is, that I only did it three times. If you can actually call it interference.", he huffs and he clasps his hands behind his back.
"If you want to know them, stay. If you don't, you can join them inside and forget that we ever talked.", he continues in a civil tone.

It is the first time in years that he gives me the possibility to choose. I weigh my options. Do I want to know it? Do I want to know what he did? And if so, could I really believe anything he says? I remember the night I told Dave about what happened and the conversation afterwards. Maybe listening to him will get me some answers. But am I ready to hear them?

Taking a deep breath, I face him, and I indicate to him with my hand that he should continue.

"The first time I tried to interfere was the flight you had with the Thunderbirds after graduation. It was a gift from Wifi, that I told him not to give you. Not because I didn't want you to get on a plane, but because I was afraid you would fall in love with flying again.", he says, and confused I draw my eyebrows together. What does he mean with falling in love with flying again?

That flight made me fall in love with aviation.
That flight showed me what I was meant to do in my life.
That flight put me on a path that led right here.

"You probably don't remember as you were still too young to understand everything around you. Your mother always tried to travel with me to the air shows when I was part of the Blue Angels as their narrator. I still remember you watching the planes in awe and when we were back home, you ran around as fast as your little legs could carry you. You had your hands outstretched and tried to copy the sounds of the jets. Right then and there I knew you were destinated to become a fighter pilot.", he says with a nostalgic tone in his voice.