In Over His Head

Chapter 23 - Present Day

Present Day

The late afternoon light was stretching across the office, pushing the shadows of the furniture out long and lean. Staffers were leaving for the day, random goodbyes and laughter echoing in from the courtyard. Rupert trundled by the gate in one of the ATVs, various plants bouncing about in the back. The hum of activity around him hadn't been unwelcome. He liked the way it felt here, as opposed to the city. No one hurried as much. Activity felt purposeful.

Kevin stretched. He'd worked out hard that morning, the pull of tired muscles not unpleasant and he stood, leaving his desk to stand at the window and take in the bustle, regretting not going for a walk on his lunch.

Across the office, Sharla was curled up in her giant office chair, a pen between her teeth, as usual, her messy bun slowly falling apart to send tendrils spiralling down. He itched to touch them, push them aside and feel the smooth skin of her neck under his fingers. When she was in her zone like this, he was drawn to her like a moth to flame, craving the burn.

Making fists to quell that urge, he wondered if he would ever find his way out of how he felt for her. It had been a few months since the last time they'd... Well, since he'd said what he said.

Maybe he was restless. They were due to head for Toronto in three days and he wasn't entirely sure he was ready to travel with her again. Whenever they travelled for more than a few days together, they ended up in bed. How he was going to be with her on the plane, and in the same hotel was beyond him. He was also debating whether to be fool enough to try once more to convince her she was worthy, to shove all her reasons into the dustbin, and let him love her.

Then they'd figure out the rest of it, the parts she was afraid of.

It was madness, honestly, to think after all this she'd change her mind. She was as stubborn as they came. Then again, so was he, because here he was, staring at her, wishing he could quit the emotions he rolled himself into anew every day when he sat down opposite her. But being beside her, he felt complete. He hated that and loved it in the same breath.

"I'm headed into London, did you want to come with?" Kevin asked spontaneously. She didn't respond, so he got up and walked over to her, tapping her shoulder. She shrieked and jumped, an earbud flying out of her ear to dangle on its cord.

"Oh my God, you nearly gave me a heart attack!" she breathed, and shot to her feet.

As she did, she bumped into him, and for a moment, neither of them moved. Kevin's heart was thudding right along with hers, because she hadn't moved away, balancing precariously on her toes for a moment. He wanted to kiss her so badly, the blush stealing across her cheeks and ears a telltale sign she was reacting to him being so close to her, his thoughts only a moment before driving that want.

"What's up?" she asked when he didn't respond, tugging on the oversized blouse she was wearing. An empty sleeve of Hobnobs was on the far side of the desk, and she frowned and brushed some errant crumbs off her breasts, which Kevin couldn't help but fixate on. When he looked back up into her face, he noticed some crumbs on her cheek as well, and before he could stop himself, reached out and brushed them off gently.

"You've got crumbs on your—" he murmured as his thumb grazed the side of her mouth. She leaned ever so slightly into his touch, her lips parting as her eyes snapped to his. He froze, trying to figure out if this meant he could lean in and kiss her.

In the next heartbeat, she jerked away and froze. "Don't," she whispered, giving him his answer.

"Sorry," he mumbled back and stepped further away, putting space between them. What the hell was he thinking? "I have to go to London tomorrow for the last of the Fellowes Trust meetings. Want to come along? Any last minute shopping you need to do?"

The awkwardness spilled between them and he could see her weighing it in her mind. She shook off his intrusion with a quick breath. "I suppose I could. When?" she asked.

"First thing. Is seven too early? We'll drive," he replied.

"No. Sounds good," she said and plonked back into her chair, putting the desk between them, not looking at him at all. The conversation was done, and bereft of what to do, Kevin walked out of the office, riled up and frustrated.

He paced into the backyard, and sank to one of the deck chairs around the square pond, resting his head in his hands. He was an idiot for touching her, it had been stupidly impulsive. "Fuck," he muttered. A frog croaked nearby in response, then splashed into the pond, floating away without a care in the world.

He pulled out his phone, clicking aimlessly around on it, checking his email. A text from Cressida popped up.

"Your mum says you are in town tomorrow. Me too. Meet up?"

He looked over at the Grange, finding the glass panelled walls of the office. Sharla was scowling at her screen, her pen back in her mouth, one shoe dangling off her foot. She wouldn't want to eat with him. Not now. It would be nice to see Cressy, and have some company that wasn't so complicated.

He typed "Sure, Oyster Shed for lunch?" and got back a thumbs up with a "noon" beside it. He thumbs-upped back. At least he'd get a chance to relax between Trust meetings. Why they couldn't be done over Zoom, he never knew.

They could talk about the wedding and maybe he could plead with Cressy to join the organising committee for the UNICEF Children's Gala. He needed someone to run interference with his mother or it would take over his life. He updated his calendar in his phone with "Lunch @ Oyster Shed" and blocked the time off as busy.

He could always count on Cressida to be there when he needed a friend. Including at a wedding where they'd be the odd ones out. Well, not really, he knew the bride and groom, got on quite well with Josh. Despite the knowledge he could very much handle whatever social situation a wedding handed him, it wouldn't be easy.

Because the woman currently swearing at her laptop in the office behind him loud enough to hear from where he was would be there too. In a beautiful dress, sparkling and radiant... and as always... Not his.