Rise Up

Chapter 16: Monza, Italy

"Nonna, how many times do I have to tell you that I can't eat lasagna before the race?" 

"Which race?"

Oh my God. Be patient, she's your old grandma after all.

"No worries nonna, I'm gonna eat Kiara's piece."

And there he was, my cousin, ready to eat everything on the table. 

"Since when you don't eat, huh? You look like you just exited prison." I took joke of him and his hungriness. 

"Shut up!"

"Please, close your mouth when you chew."

Bleah, he was disgusting but also my biggest supporter.

Stef and I started racing on karts when we were younger- he was 11 and I was 10. We were looking for some activities to do during our summer break, as our parents had to work almost all days and the school was over. Out of nowhere we found this kind of summer camp, close to our homes, where we could spend two weeks on the Mugello track, between karts and small helmets. We were already big fans of racing cars but that was the event that made us fall in love with karting ourselves.

Then we started to practice in a small kart team. In a few months we got some better, getting the chance of racing in our city and then region. Growing up, he decided to quit to focusing on school and other hobbies while I kept going increasing my passion and talent. 

When I was 14, I got the second place in the European kart Championship and P3 in the World's one. It was a big success from me, in fact it gave me the opportunity to get promoted to Formula 4 with the Mercedes Junior Academy, after Toto Wolff himself noticed me at one of the last race of the championship, took in Germany.

Since my first race in F4, my family has never left me alone, from my parents to the youngest cousin that desperately looked for an autograph from his idols, that sometimes showed up in the smaller categories as guests.

Now that I was in F1 everything was a bit more complicated: my parents had their job, my cousins and friends their studies, so I was traveling all around the world, mostly alone, while they kept trying their best to support me nevertheless.

This race weekend was in Monza, so almost all of my family was there for me. These past days have been so hard for me. I wasn't able to get any sleep because of the amount of anxiety and nightmares I was having at night. I completely lost the sense of hungriness because of the constant nauseous feeling in my stomach at the only thought of going back on that track.

I was nervous. Too much nervous.

Coming back in Monza meant that I would have to face all my fears, worries, memories and demons from the accident. The bad crash I had in 2019 while racing in F2 happened here, in Italy, at my home race.

After the big lunch at my grandma's with the rest of the family, I jumped back in my car with some of my cousins that insisted to come with me at the track, as it was Thursday and they could have finally the chance to meet all the drivers.

"Wait! Before going out, you have to promise me that you will not mess up everything, ok? You can't go around and doing whatever you want. You will stay with Susanne and follow her directions, nothing more. Was I clear?" I asked once in the car, looking at them through the mirror. 

"Yes sir!" They answered in unison like a bunch of idiots.

"Good, now take your VIP passes and disappear from my sight." They celebrated like little kids even if they were all older than me.

"Hi team. Sorry for being late but, you know, when nonna makes lasagna, you can't just say no."

They greeted me and laughed at my stupid apologies. Then Fred walked up to me.